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Meet your community champions!

replies: 10

Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

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Back at the start again and reaching out

replies: 7

I started seeing a therapist a few months ago to manage a bad period of anxiety which spiralled out of my control. She helped me through it and now I'm past that initial stage, now my immediate symptoms are back under control, I'm staring at the numb, meaningless void of depression. That's terrifying. I've made such an effort to function and now I might not for a while. I might fall over. And I'm so angry about that. There's an odd sense of sadness, too, that I might grow to hate my therapist. I like her. She's patient and warm and genuine and fosters such a wonderful sense of safety. But I don't want to talk to her. I don't want her to know what I think and why I think it. I don't want to shift that sensible, reliable, functional mask. It feels like it's all I have to stitch my life together and keep me going to work, walking my dogs, speaking to my friends and distracting myself from the pointless recycling of time that I feel my life has become. It's also a container. Some days it feels like my grim reality is a toxic sludge I don't want other people to have to think about. I like hiding it. I like knowing that the people around me are happy and comfortable because I can share in that comfort. If the people I love are happy then hiding all of this horrid crap inside my head is worth it. But it's so exhausting. And it leeches energy from all the other parts of my life. It's hard to keep up the front when the energy you need to build and maintain it keeps collapsing in on itself. Small setbacks become the emotional Himalayas. Even my stores of anger - a place of false control and a useful substitute for motivation when I can't muster any - are waning. I feel like a light bulb dimming in a dark room. My therapist suggested group therapy at the start and I so forcefully rejected it that I was surprised to discover how frightening I found the prospect. Reaching out here because it's anonymous and safe and hopefully I won't be quite so scared about sharing stuff if I can do it here. Small steps. I hate all of this. I hate it so much. But I don't feel quite so lonely after reading some of your posts today so thanks for being open and brave.

War paint

replies: 1

Im a 34 yr old male, and have lived with a social anixiety dissorder for as long as i can remember. I have never spoken about my anixiety, and have been battling it for 36 years. Every day i put on my war paint, walk outside and face the world as best i can. Those close to me see me live my busy life, and always happy, but i spend my time living in fear of dealing with my worst fear. People I wish i could have had a normal fear like of spiders or snakes. But instead i live in fear of humans. As with some of you who also live with anxiety , you know the feeling of how much it wears you down trying to deal with it alone, every day but dealing with it since every day of your life, is an experience on its own. Today is the first day i admit my weakness and disply my white flag, and say im tired of anxiety. My name is gypsy soul, i want to say hello, and i know how it feels to be your worst own enermy

First discovering depression

replies: 1

Hi, recently I have been feeling very down and have thoughts of suicide most nights when I am alone. I am a very shy and reserved person which means that I find it hard to open up to doctors and I find it even harder to tell my parents that I am having these thoughts of suicide. Does anyone know how I can gain the confidence to reach out. Does anyone have a good way of coping with these feelings, just before bed when I am alone is the worst of them where I constantly feel as if I want to take my life but I’m too scared to go through with it, how can I get myself out of these thoughts? Usually I try to go to sleep but that leads me to having horrible dreams and a disrupted sleep. School is great for taking my mind off of things but I hate being around so many people that seem so happy when I don’t feel happy at all. The thing that’s getting me through is that I have plans for my life and wish to pursue them but I just keep on getting caught up in bad thoughts and it feels as if it’s 1 step forward and 2 steps back.

Hello

replies: 3

Hello everyone, I'm new here

New. Husband has chronic pain.

replies: 1

Hi everyone. New to posting a thread here. It's abit nervewrecking to admit. Like a can of worms you don't want to open. Im a mum of 2 (8 & 11). They're old enough to pick up when things aren't right. You can't pretend to them that things are ok. They know you're lying and so they ask you more questions. They're behaviours change when things at home aren't right. My defacto husband has a back pain and other health conditions. I've fully supported him for over 10 years now. It's been a long time that my life has revolved around how he is going. We moved to a rural property. It's off grid so we don't have alot of financial burden. But it is a lifestyle that has its own challenges. Many might think we're lucky. Yes, but it is very isolating. I guess I'm just recognising that life isn't going how I thought it would be. I feel like a whinging ungrateful b**ch but for a long time I've been on a slow downward spiral. Most days I can't connect with my husband. I don't know how to enjoy my life anymore. I can't seem to think straight anymore. I just keep pushing my feelings aside and getting on with getting through each day. Is anyone else here a carer or a supportive partner to someone who has chronic pain? I have seen a psychologist before. But I didn't feel like it really helped. I feel so alone and that no one really understands what I'm dealing with. Thanks for listening.

Newbie post

replies: 2

Hello! New here. My anxiety is at the worst it’s ever been. I’ve suffered from anxiety off and on for as long as I can remember. The last 3 months have worn me down to the lowest I’ve been, struggling with a mix of anxiety, depression and burnout. I’m starting a mental heath plan, and have been working really closely with my GP. Stepping out of my comfort zone to join this forum and speak to others who know how it is and how to deal with the really bad anxiety days.

Quitting job because of anxiety

replies: 5

First time poster. I want to quit my job because it’s the main contributor to my anxiety. I earn good money but I feel like taking a lesser paid job with less responsibility. Has anyone experienced this? How did it work out? Am I attaching too much importance to money? I just really feel I want to be responsible for myself. My job now I’m responsible for the performance of others and I really don’t want that at this time in my life.

How my life spiralled out of control

replies: 1

I have always struggled with mental health but between 2015-2018 it was the best it had been. In the last 15 months it has been an all time low and my whole life has spiralled out of control. In March 2018 I started to experience knee pain. It existed literally all day every day and not one pain killer would touch it. It was severe majority of the time for 12 months. I saw 15 different "specialists" and not one could work out the problem. I was told it was a mystery pain and I would have to learn to live with the pain. I was 29 years old at the time. My life became unbearable. Chronic pain sucked the life out of me and removed any enjoyment. I would have liked my life if it wasn't for the pain. I felt like I was going through something which no one understood and no one could help me. This wasn't acceptable so I dedicated my life to researching and getting out of pain. I worked out the answer when everyone else failed two months ago. I have started my self devised rehab program and complete it every day. I am seeing results slowly and confident in enough time the pain will be gone. The experience has changed me forever. I can no longer trust anyone and I feel so alone. The chronic pain issue meant I left my job last November. I couldn't physically get to the office because driving worsened my pain. I couldn't get there by public transport because of my anxiety. I couldn't focus on work and became unproductive. I knew I was likely to be fired so left first. This was a high paying job which would have set me up for life. I studied three degrees to get it. Now I am unemployed and struggling financially. We run out of money every pay cycle, have no savings and can barely pay the bills. I feel angry that the negligence of the medical profession caused me to be in this situation. I never liked work but without it my life is a meaningless day to day existence. It feels strange to have no higher purpose. My days are empty and nothing is worth it. The isolation and spending all day every day alone is driving me nuts. I have no where to go and nothing to do. I feel so alone. The only thing saving me this last year is running. It is the only point to my life and my only social interaction. This week I injured my calf and the thought of not running is unbearable. My whole world has fallen apart and it's attached to my mental health. I go to worse case scenario because of my knee experience. I wish I didn't have to continue living.

New to this

replies: 4

Hi, I am 47 and just feel numb like I’m standing still and life is going on around me. My childhood wasn’t great I haven’t had contact with my mother since I left home at 15. Since then I have always lived my life by if anyone does me wrong I just walk away cut them out completely. I met my husband when I was 18 got married and started a family I was determined to create a life and family I had always dreamt of. I had 3 amazing kids and a great husband don’t get me wrong life was tuff financially and raising 3 kids but I felt my life was complete the in 2013 I found my husband whilst working overseas had been cheating for over 2 years was living a completely other life. That moment my world opened up right under my feet and I was completely gutted I was treading water with life I always imagined that if that happened to me I would leave but at that time I couldn’t cope with anything let alone starting life again we went to marriage counseling. Anyway 6 months into that when I was trying to find my feet we were told my 20 yr old son had a brain tumour the marriage was put on the back burning and now I had to find the strength to get through this with my son. In October 2014 we were told they could do no more and my son passed away in December I thought what was going in my marriage was the worst thing but No this was my worst nightmare. So today 6 yrs after my world came crashing down and 4 yrs after my son passed away I find my self wondering why I am here wondering how I am suppose to be happy or what would even make me happy I have withdrawn myself from the outside world completely I very really leave the house or see anyone. I just don’t want to live like this but my anxiety is so great I can’t change it.i often wonder why life would deal me 2 terrible things at once

Poor choices

replies: 5

Hello there I have recently made some very poor choices with my life and have destroyed all trust my wife had in me. I have been hurting for some time with our own issues and struggling to understand how we got to this situation but more recently I have engaged in an emotional connection with someone that is now over but the lies I told in that moment are going to continue to haunt me I feel forever I am a lousy person and a lousy husband and been a big disappointment to my kids as I have hurt their mum in such a way that it will affect them so much more than I could imagine I feel so remorseful but don’t have any clue on what to do next as this is all we do keep going over the same things and feeling more pain . My family really did deserve better than what I have done just not sure on what to do with myself at the moment

Meet your community champions! replies: 10

HELP..Am I posting in the right section? replies: 10

Back at the start again and reaching out replies: 7

War paint replies: 1

First discovering depression replies: 1

Hello replies: 3

New. Husband has chronic pain. replies: 1

Newbie post replies: 2

Quitting job because of anxiety replies: 5

How my life spiralled out of control replies: 1

New to this replies: 4

Poor choices replies: 5