Welcome and Orientation

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Meet your community champions!

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Hi everyone, We wanted to share with you the way that our wonderful Community Champions are here to support you. You may have noticed that a few of our Forums members are labelled ‘Community Champion’. Community Champions are volunteers within the Beyond Blue Forums who: have the time, skills and empathy to support other members regularly; help to welcome new members; are actively engaged members that help set the tone of our community. Our Community Champions are regular contributors to many conversations across the forums. They are a consistent and friendly voice that have committed to sharing their experience and expertise with this community. They are not health care professionals or clinicians. Like you, they have an experience with a mental health challenge or diagnosis – either for themselves or someone they care for. This forum is for people who understand what it feels like and have a lived and living experience of mental health challenges. Our Community Champions help everyone feel comfortable and confident by demonstrating what excellent peer support is all about. Click here to find out more about how you can become a Community Champion! This incredible team are excited to introduce themselves below, and we are sure you’ll see them around the forums in conversations important to you.

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10

Welcome to those who are considering posting for the very first time, welcome. Thought I would repost part of the words that Chris B posted awhile ago, (2014) as I can hear that people are unsure if they are posting in the right section or worried that they are posting "the wrong thing". 1.A good title makes the difference Just like a headline in a newspaper, when scanning the dozens of threads to click into, it’s only natural that people will choose the ones that resonate with them most. A title that entices the reader, or asks a question, is likely to get a better result than something non-descriptive like “Depression” or “I don't know what to do”. If you think you’re not good at choosing titles, leave it till last. Spend time writing your post, then perhaps choose a sentence from what you’ve written as the title. 2.Join in threads that have already been posted We all have our own unique stories, but part of the reason for joining a forum like this one is because you know that you will have a lot in common with others who are posting. Before starting a new thread, have a look through the current topics being discussed and see if there’s a conversation you can join in with. It can be quite common to have a handful of very similar threads happening at any one time, with members seemingly unaware that there are others right there who are going through the same thing. Talking to other members on their threads is a great way of getting yourself known so that when you post a thread of your own, people may respond quicker because they recognize your name. 3.Choose the most appropriate section for your post Many people browse the forums looking for stories specifically to do with pregnancy and parenting, employment, grief, loss, separation etc. Going straight for the “Depression” section may seem like the easiest option, but this section is often the busiest, so your post is more likely to get lost among the threads. Making good use of the different forum sections not only helps keep the forum relevant, but you’re more likely to find others who are going through the same experiences as you. Also, if you're wanting to discuss issues of trauma, abuse, suicidal thoughts or self-harm, it's really important you post in the designated section to avoid triggering others who may not wish to read about these topics. Mostly..just come and chat, we are here for you. Our amazing wizards in the background will see your message ends up in the right spot. Sarah

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Hi everyone!

replies: 3

Hi everyone! I just joined this today mainly just hoping for some support. lately I’ve been feeling symptoms of Depersonalisation and social anxiety. I didn’t think much of it earlier, since I’ve always been very introverted and quiet. But It’s just gotten worse. It’s really hard to explain. I feel like I can’t really talk to any of my family, I know they would just tell me to brush it off and stop asking for attention. Though I’m really not, I can’t go out in public without thinking “are they looking at me?” “I’m doing something wrong” “it’s too crowded, I’m suffocating” at school I panic if something so much talk to me. Worried I’ll say something wrong, or their only talking to me because they feel forced. I wear baggy clothes to cover up my body worried someone will judge. I find it impossible to connect to people. I would love to see a gp, to see if I really have social anxiety. But I can’t with my parents hovering around me. thanks to anyone who actually reads my ranting

Feeling a little lost...

replies: 8

Hey all, Not sure what I expect from here but thought it worth a shot. I live alone and have no friends and am finding being in lock down and not seeing or speaking to anyone for days on end is really getting me down. I'm a 54 year old shy introvert, who has always had trouble keeping friends. They always seem to just use me to get what they want and then I never hear from them again. Never had a real girlfriend as I was hurt so often in my youth that it was just easier to give up but really need someone to share my life with. I've tried dating apps for the last 18 months and been on three dates but never get to a second. The last lady was keen on the second date but after she had cancelled the night before on three occasions I gave up on her as it hurt every time she cancelled when I was so looking forward to meeting her again. I think what's getting to me now is I had a neighbour who would visit me daily as soon as I'd get home from work and we would spend the nights watching TV. I thought I'd found 'the one' and was so happy for a little while there. Things didn't work out romantically though as we each discovered the others age. I look younger than my 54 years (I was actually 53 when we met) and she looked older than her age (she's 29) I thought she was in her mid 30's and she thought I was in my mid 40s so I just had to be content to be happy to have as my only friend outside of work. Now that she has moved interstate (luckily moved a week before these lock downs), she seems too busy to reply to my texts or phone calls. She has lots of friends her own age so I don't expect to be a priority but it still hurts. Maybe it's best I just forget all about her. So basically, I'm not sure how to get out of this rut. Always have negative thoughts, always thought of myself as an outsider just watching everyone else enjoy life and don't feel like I fit in anywhere. Finding it very hard to eat and sleep, always feel sick in the stomach and just basically terribly lonely and feel like crying sometimes. What a man Thanks for spending the time to read and I'm open to suggestions.

New and....erm, feeling a bit nervous

replies: 27

Hey all - new around here. Just realised my handle probably isn't the best for these forums - but it's literally a Doctor Who reference as I love that show!. Hope everyone is ok , especially any Sydney friends that read this - it'll get better!!! Had a long battle with anxiety and confidence issues. Still going. Tried counselling, worked for a while until my partner and I lost 2 babies back to back, then I kinda shut down. Used to drink too much in my teens/twenties. Son of an ex junkie (i saved his life by being born essentially). I have same personality traits as my old man so i have removed booze from my life and never touched recreational drugs (except weed as a youngster). That's the short story lol. Oh and I love Doctor Who, Wrestling (watching not doing lol), Music, Rick and Morty and Gaming. Why am I here? Well, I always like to invest time to help others, sometimes to a fault lol. I want to get involved, I want to see if I can help people, make people feel more positive, give them advice or just make em laugh. I'm no expert but I thoughtful and wise beyond my 41 years, plus my wife always says I'm really good at this kind of thing and she's usually right haha. Thanks for reading !!

Hello :)

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Hi - I'm new to this forum and I'm looking forward to catching up on all the past threads. Thank you Beyond Blue and all the amazing volunteers who strive to support people in times of need. Have a great day everyone

Hi

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Hi there, I don’t know how to start. It has been hard few years. A lot has happened. A family member attempted suicide. A family member died. A family member got in lots of life issues. I am the “rock”of the family and I have been the responser to all this. I have been having panic attacks for over a year. I can’t sleep well I started having thoughts a few months back. I just want it to stop

Resources for young children living with an adult suffering extreme mental health conditions

replies: 1

Help! I am new to this forum and this is my first post. I am seeking any resources that can help build understanding and resilience in young children who witness extreme behaviour from a familiar adult who is diagnosed with a mental health condition. I work in a number of overlapping community groups and want to share any resources recommended with the teams supporting these children. Although I have created an account with Beyond Blue, there may be other organisations that could support this query also?

Unbalanced by name - unbalanced by nature?

replies: 2

Hi all, I don't know if this will help me or help others, but I am going to give it a shot. Hope so.. I haven't been diagnosed with a disorder, but know i am not not right mentally. i can't seem to find a balance in my life - I consider myself to be an intelligent, skilled and creative person, with a loving partner and, a home and property - that i think most people would find desirable. That said, no matter how much i achieve it never seems to be enough. I have anguished thoughts that I don't do enough, and that i am a consent disappointment to my partner, myself and my colleagues. As you can see I can tend to have a high opinion of myself, which then metamorphoses into a spiralling state of anxiousness, resulting in thoughts that i am actually a selfish idiot and that all would be better off without me. I do have thoughts of self harm - but don't see how this would help anyone other than myself - again selfishness. I seem to want to destroy all that I that I have built. My thoughts always seem to turn negative. Why? There is a lot of i's in this monologue - I haven't built everything I have by myself - but the dark fog that descends on me seems to alienate me from reality, and i sometimes feel as if i am losing my mind. I am not a substance abuser - I have had episodes of mental illness in the past where this has been the case, but have worked hard over the last 10 years to recognise when enjoyment turns to wanton annihilation & self destruction. I love my partner with all my heart, but want to push her away emotionally - I want companionship and love, but then reject it..Why? I am generally a very active person- physically and mentally, I like to create and build, but then have these thoughts of 'whats the point / why am i doing this' and fail to see any future benefit in it, and the project then becomes a burden. Why? I struggle to find any enjoyment in life - even though I don't actually have anything to complain about. Why? I really want to find a way to clear and balance the thoughts in my head, but have episodes - weeks/months where i feel completely off kilter & the smallest things seem to tip me back over the edge, into a sea of self loathing and irrational thoughts, and a want for isolation and to distance myself from those i love and who i know love me. Why? I have heard some mental illness is like a long dark tunnel - often i literally just walk or drive with no focused destination in mind. But i don't know what i am running from or too.

First Time Poster - Long Time Sufferer

replies: 9

Hi All, thought it was time to reach out, put my hand up and say 'I'm tired, I'm not coping and I'm scared'. I have been diagnosed with major depression and just recently added anxiety to the list, I've been on different medications for 10 years but still struggle. I recently started a new job that is slowly progressing well, I have moved away from a farm that I thought was home for 11 years and I feel like my relationship has come to a natural end. I sent my partner a message early this morning, after not speaking to each other for over a week, I reached out to him and said that I was struggling and not coping - but got nothing back. In my head that tells me he just doesn't care. I am struggling financially and truth be told I have always struggled with money and not been smart over the years. I don't want much I just want security and contentment. I am just so tired, I have no energy or drive to do anything and I know that is part of depression but it's killing me inside. I want to active I want to move and I want to feel happy, I just don't know what to do to feel that way again. I guessed this was a good place to start. Thanks for listening/reading

Monthly Forums Update: Reflecting Back on June

replies: 0

Hi Everyone We appreciate all who have dropped by the forums and welcome those who may have written their first post, as well as members of the community who may have just started reading along. We hope you feel a sense of connection and belonging by navigating the different forums here and know that you are not alone in your journey. At this time we also acknowledge members of the community that may be currently impacted by recent COVID-19 restrictions. The Coronavirus Mental Wellbeing Support Service continues to provide up to date information and resources or call 1800 512 348 check in with our trained counsellors who are available 24/7. Community Voices: What are people talking about? Struggling with self-worth I had an entire 24 hours filled with shear panic and tears and I didn’t think any of my friends could understand what’s happening..In those moments I fail to see my self worth. I know I am a capable adult, I have a secure job, I pay my bills, car it’s payed for - mortgage on track and super just the same... But the thought of having to share all those sides of me with a new person … and the fact that he is not quite as “in touch” with being in touch as I am scares the living light out of me. - Ali A (Read more here) The last time we had any form of intimacy was in early April, and I'm finding myself more and more depressed, and hating my body more (I know it's a viscous cycle, but I feel so unattractive). My partner knows my thoughts on this, and how it makes me feel. I've tried talking with him about this numerous times, but it ends up going nowhere. - Firefly112 (Read more here) I’ve been on two dates now with this amazing guy that I met through a dating app. So far he has shown that he is the kind of person I would actually want a relationship with. I don’t have strong self-esteem/sense of self worth and these feelings of him being way out of my league are starting to creep in. - Von is lost (Read more here) Sexuality and Gender Identity So my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years told me that he thinks he might be Bisexual. It's a big 'thinks' and he's still figuring it out. I'm the only person he had told so far. As far as I can tell, he isn't wanting to jump into a relationship with someone else.. I'm really happy, honestly, that he told me. I'm just wondering how I can support him moving forwards, especially if he determines this is definitely his sexual identity. - Willowtree_21 (Read more here) So, for the past month I've had a few strange things happen to me that has made me question whether my sexuality is what I always thought it was... It all started when I began having intense dreams and fantasies about men, I thought if I were going to have anything like that it would be with a woman. Along with a few other things I found myself being leaning towards men than women, which is confusing me to no end. – IAMTHEONE (Read more here) I think I’m bi. But I’m scared I’m wrong. I’ve never dated anyone so how would I even know. But I see girls and I want to kiss them. Bit like what if I am wrong. Then I would have to go to anybody who knows and tell them that I was wrong. – Lucette (Read more here) Experiencing Grief/Loss After Ending a Relationship So I have just found out my ex has resigned from his job, we work together and I'm not sure how I am feeling. He has at least told me so I don't here through the grapevine. Part of me is relieved as I find it awkward when i have to be near him, but part of me is sad. Once he leaves I may never see him again and that thought just breaks my heart. - bubbles85 (Read more here) I found out my ex-partner (lovely person btw) is expecting a baby with their new partner. I am happy for them but is this sense of loss and envy, that I'm feeling, normal? How do I come to terms with it and move on? – Gelati (Read more here) I just can’t move on. I’m seeing a counsellor, and it helps a bit. But I’m still grieving. After mixed messages from him. I have asked for no contact to heal. He can’t seem to leave me though. He wants contact wants to see the kids, they love catching up, but it’s too hard me. – Mlkl (Read more here) Valued Contributor Award Our Valued Contributor for the month of June is jtjt_4862! jtjt_4862 has been nominated for their continuous efforts to check in with community members while engaging with others in a friendly and respectful manner. Thank you for taking the time to connect and support others! To read more about what a Valued Contributor is and how you can nominate a fellow community member, please refer to our thread Nominate a Valued Contributor here: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support BB News/Resources A reminder that along with the wonderful peer community here Beyond Blue has several supportive resources, articles, and podcasts available that you may connect with or may wish to share with a mate/loved one: What works for anxiety? What works for depression? Sexuality and self-acceptance: I’m tired of hiding the real me Coping with a relationship breakdown How to maintain your healthy lockdown habits in the ‘new normal’

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Meet your community champions!

replies: 10

HELP..Am I posting in the right section?

replies: 10