A quick hello

[Arendt68]

To anybody who has, had or may develop depression you will hear the phrase 'you are not alone' quite a bit.

I am a psychologist (with severe depression and PTSD) and I know full well how 'it' feels from both a personal point of view and somebody who has discussed depression with many people over many, many years.

The question I have asked myself and others have asked of me is this: is there a cure? The short answer is yes, absolutely. The long answer is that like any disease, the first step is to identify what 'it' is and to move forward from there. 'It' has a name, or names: depression, clinical depression, bi-polar (an aspect thereof), and a whole host of other terminologies that at least put us within arm's reach of getting it all out in the open. Right. That is step 1: do not hold back. You know depression when you feel it. Get it out in the open.

Step 2.

Don't forget step 1.

Step 3.

Read widely on the matter. It's your mind and body, sure. But knowledge really is power and the more we understand about ourselves and others the less likely we will be to feel alone, which quite clearly we're not. Yes, there are feelings of isolation, loneliness, despair, guilt (I'll come back to this), good old fashioned sadness. But, hey, there's usually a reason for most things.

Step 4.

Guilt! No. You're not going to infect anybody and nobody has been infected. This is you being mindful of others. Well done. But, you don't have tuberculosis. You cannot cough and transmit this particular disease. Guilt is (in my opinion) a massive aspect of depression. Guilt is pervasive and evasive. It is radiated at us, sometimes directly, sometimes not. 'Cheer up!' people say.... Eh? This isn't some bad hair day. I have an inability to construct a particular type of future! (so the argument goes). R U OK? Don't answer 'yes.' You'd be lying to yourself and others. Just tell it how it is. Fact: I suffer from depression. Fact: so do many others. Fact: depression is more than likely on the increase. Why? Because more of us are starting to discuss it. Fact: are there environmental factors associated with depression? Bit of an odd question really. It is a bit like asking if life requires water. Quite simply, yes. The environment is everything. No two ways about it.

Step 5.

I'm running out of words and need to wrap up my 'quick hello.'

Step 6.

Ask yourself, right now: 'who do I love more than life itself?' and then let me know.

xxxxxxxxx

[BballJ]

Hi Arendt68,

Wow, what a post. Your experience will be extremely valuable on these forums I think.

Depression is something else isn't it. I am glad it is more widely recognised as an actual illness these days along with anxiety and the many other forms of mental health that are discussed here and elsewhere. It still has ways to go but I think it can get there.

The question you ended with - who do you love more than life itself... I'd firstly say my partner and my family but I feel this question should be answered with the answer of myself. Get's you thinking I must admit.

My best for you,

Jay

[geoff]

hello Arendt, I agree with Jay a good post, and being a psychologist doesn't mean that you are strong enough to shrug off this horrible disease to which I'm very sorry, it's a devastating illness that just seems to stick, we can't shake it off, or even wipe it off because it's impenetrable and it's takes hard work and lots of support, either medically, counseling and help from people who are genuinely caring and know that all of a sudden your personality has drastically changed for the worse.
Being a psychologist doesn't necessarily mean that you can help yourself because theoretical you know what to do but you may not be able to put anything into practice, so you need the assistance from someone else.
This doesn't stop you from helping other people but you may feel much more exhausted than you usually do, but at the end of the day you will crash with the possibility of doing what you have told your patients not to do, that's the power of depression.
To answer your question, yes I love my two sons, SIL, two beautiful granddaughters and my twin, plus the people who I have made close friendship with from this site. Geoff.