When my child is too anxious to visit a GP for a medical certificate

[KazKaz]

My 13 yr old daughter is too anxious to visit a GP yet requires a medical certificate as she is no longer able to go to school - Doctor's surgery wont help and the school will not accept that she needs time off to get better without a certificate - school will not send work home for her without a doctor's certicicate as they "don't home school"- this is creating more and enormous anxiety in my daughter and in me! Is there an alternative route? Going to a doctors surgery is not an option and they will not visit my daughter as she has not been to the surgery for years although is still registered there.

[Dr_Kim]

Hi KazKaz, this is a tough one but I think really critical that you get a plan together to take the heat out of the situation so that everyone in the family can feel a bit more relaxed and hopeful.

The first thing that springs to mind is calling a Headspace clinic. They are National and I hope there is one somewhere near to you. They vary as to what staff they have, but all have psychologists, some have GPs, some psychiatrists , some youth workers and some may even do outreach (ie come to your home) .The intake person will hopefully have some suggestions for you as to how to start to get on top of your daughters anxiety. It may be that she needs to manage the anxiety first then work out ways to re integrate back into school .

How to get into to “see someone” is difficult . Maybe if she knows that the person she is seeing is NOT a doctor but a youth worker who may meet you both in a cafe for example .. that might work .. or maybe she would be ok to have a meeting with a mental health professional if she knows that she can take you with her ..

I would speak to the Headspace (or even contact eHeadspace) and then take NOT getting help off the table as an option . Simply say that there are a few ways that you all can move forward , and then present her with a few options that maybe you and the intake worker have devised. This still leaves her with a sense of control but makes it clear that you are firm in your conviction that she needs to get better because you love and care for her and it is your job as her mum to sometimes cause temporary upset in her for long term benefit.

Explain to her that the horrible feelings she is getting about going to school or the doctor are part of a problem called anxiety and you are going to work with her to help her control it as it really feels awful and its a journey but most can’t do it alone. You both need mental health professionals to teach you how to squash down the horrible feelings . Tell her 20% of young people feel anxiety or depression so she’s not freaky ,its just really hard and tough that she has it so young and really intensely right now. But like many, with help she has a great chance of overcoming it .