Dear Racheal
Welcome to Beyond Blue. It's great that you are looking after your partner. As Tony has commented, BPD is a difficult condition so I am impressed that your partner is facing this and trying her hardest to get proper treatment. Admitting the illness is always the hardest part.
I have read a little on this topic. Comparative Treatments for Borderline Personality Disorder, by Freeman, Stone & Martin editors. I understand Marsha Linehan is an authority on this topic and has written Cognitive Behavioural Treatment of Borderline Personality Disorder. I think there is also a workbook that goes with this book.
They look a little heavy but I found they were relatively easy to read. I don't recall any recommendation for ECT as therapy and as the psychologist has admitted she does not have the skills to help I would be wary of taking this path. Once done it cannot be undone.
Unfortunately we are not allowed to give names of practitioners so even if I did know anyone in Melbourne I could not help. However, I believe the Linehan CBT process is used in various places, so perhaps your GP could help track down a practitioner.
By the way, does your GP know of the BPD diagnosis? If so he/she should be able to refer you to a suitable therapist, whether psychologist or psychiatrist. I suggest you go back to your doc and get another referral. The mental health plan gives ten free visits but pointless if the psych is not up to scratch.
So you could change psychologists. Alternatively a referral to a psychiatrist may be more useful financially in the long run as Medicare will pay a large part of the fee. And there are no limits on the length of treatment. Again, talk to your doctor.
Please do not get too distressed because you feel guilty about your partner. It's a sad but true fact that those who have not experienced mental illness are not fully aware of the awfulness of the condition. Put the past behind you and move forward with as much positivity (is this a word) as possible.
You are giving support to your partner and love and care. You can do no more.
Please write in as often as you need.
Mary
