struggling with special needs children

[Matchy69]

Does anyone else have children with special needs.I am struggling with mine.My youngest cant use a toilet when their at the age they should be.I am getting tired of changing them,does that make me a bad parent?The constant hyperepisodes are taking their strain especially that i am going through other personal stuff in my life

[Hanna3]

Hi Mark

I'm sorry about your friend - we get a jolt when someone close to us or that we have known for a long time dies - it's a huge loss to us, and it reminds us of our own mortaility.  I had two wonderful friends sadly died much too young.  I stil enjoy remembering the good times we had. Are you able to attend your friend's funeral?  

It was incredibly hot here yesterday and then a storm late in the day that was like a mini-monsoon.  Today it's very very humid and going to storm again.

You have great memories of your Dad and the butcher's shop... I hope you can hold on to good memories of your friend. How long did you know your friend Mark?  It's a big loss when we lose someone who has been a friend for a long time.

[Matchy69]

Hi I have known my friend for probably 50 years.He lived 4 houses from me when we were kids.My parents would have his parents over for bbqs where our dads would talk about their motorbike days from the 1940s.My friend and I ended up buying the same first car,his was olive green and mine was white.I am not sure when or where the funeral will be.It might be overseas.I have lost so many people over the years and wonder why sometimes when they are really good people.

[Hanna3]

Hi Mark, it's so hard when it's a friend you go back with a long way like that.  I lost two friends like that - really wonderful, dear people - one had a sudden acute illness and died quickly and the other had some brain disease and her personality slowly disintegrated - which in a way was even worse.  Both of them were dear friends for years and really good kind people.

I still miss them and I do cherish the times I had with both of them.  I hope you can find out about the funeral, if it's possible for you to attend I think that would be a good thing.  Do you have a family address where you could send a card?  All we can do is grieve and cherish the memories of good times.

I think the price we pay for living is that we suffer grief from time to time.  It's never easy, it hurts like hell at times.  Give yourself time to feel sad Mark, it's lovely that you had that friendship, friends like that are gold.

I wish there was more I could say - but there's no way out of grief as we live - it's what we have to get through as best we can - but grief and loss are terribly painful.  I'm glad you can talk about it here, sorry I was not here much yesterday -if you would like to talk more please do - I will be out for some time this morning but will check back later on today.

[Matchy69]

Hi Hanna my friend lost his partner about two years ago and they were running a guest house overseas.He kept inviting me over but never got there.His mother came to my mother's funeral would have been the last time I have seen her and don't know where she is these days.He had an older brother who was in my brothers class and a younger sister.My friend was gay and never had kids of his own.His partner was a beautiful man as well and was a huge shock when he went.

The last day of the year and just remembering my first car I bought on this day a 1967 Toyota corona which was the sane as my friends who had bought it a few months earlier.Jus t a coincidence that we ended up with the same car.

[Hanna3]

Hi Mark, sounds like you have some nice memories of your friend and his family.

Gosh a Toyota corona I remember those!  I was reading reddit Australia this morning on my phone while I was at a cafe waiting for a friend and there is/was a discussion going on about what is causing the increase of road deaths in Australia.  I hate the huge SUVs that are around now, if they hit my little car I would be cactus and they would be OK.  It was an interesting discussion with several different viewpoints.  I think speeding and tailgating are a problem too.

I am definitely not driving anywhere this afternoon and tomorrow morning the police with speed cameras will be everywhere to catch drunk drivers after New Years Eve parties.  I ducked into Woolworths at lunchtime for a couple of things and it was packed and I was parked between two huge SUVs or people movers and by the time I back out far enough to see if anything is coming, I am in the middle of the traffic! They make me blind on both sides in my small Honda Jazz.  

I've been feeding the rainbow lorikeets, today is cold and wet and they're hungry.  They sit all over my arms and hands to get the apple I give them - they certainly enjoy their food!

I hope you have a pleasant New Year's Eve - tomorrow will be 2024, goodness.  Are you doing anything to celebrate with your kids?  

Not much to do here as everything is closed tomorrow and the town is packed with holiday makers, if it's a nice day I think they will all be at the beaches.  You can't park within a couple of kilometers of any beach here at the moment with all the crowds!

[Matchy69]

Hi Hanna it will be a quiet night for me tonight.The kids come back tomorrow.I had a dispute with my ex this morning.I am getting to old for her nonsense.

I hate SUVs they are so big yet they have no room in them.zmy daughter has one and is not big enough for her and her kids.They always park next to to you at the shopping centre and you can't see around them.Cars are always changing through the decades so will be interesting to see what the next fad is and if ehe electric ones take off in this country.

I have rainbow lorikeets here when the natives are in flower.zthey are such a beautiful bird and probably my favourite bird.

[Hanna3]

Hi Mark the discussion on reddit was about how the big SUVs are involved in major accidents when they hit a smaller car.  I often worry about that.  I remember I found a video on utube some time ago that was about the dangers of these huge vehicles on the road with smaller cars, it's a real problem.  

It's quiet here, it's rained a lot and anyway I don't want to be on the road!  I'll just chill in front of a movie or documentary later - the library here has great documentaries you can borrow on DVD format.  I watched one recently about how easily you can be tracked down via social media if you disappear - it's amazing the records that are held about us from our mobile phones.  

The rainbow lorikeets drink at my birdbath a lot and I feed them pieces of apple which they love and it's healthy for them.  Some people feed them cake or bread but that's not good for them, they like fruit like apple a lot. Because it's cool today I had a huge crowd of them, they sit on my arms they are so greedy for their apple!  I am missing Sam a lot today, partly because it's New Year tomorrow and he isn't here and partly today because he used to love sitting at the door watching the rainbow lorikeets bathing and feeding.  I'm still not sure where I am going to get another dog.

I often find interesting things to read on Reddit Australia - some people post interesting photographs as well.  

I hope you have a pleasant evening.. I am enjoying the cooler weather today, the last few days have been dreadfully hot.

I do wish you a happy and healthy New Year Mark and to your family.  I hope the year ahead is a good one!

[mmMekitty]

Wishing you, Matchy, your kids,& Hanna & everyone a brighter & healthier 2024. & more of those special days when you feed Rainbow Lorikeets.(Just don't let them rely on you too much).

Hugzies

mmMekitty  

[Matchy69]

My daughter bought my son.over today.I will have to work on my sons toileting again.I think with all the big changes it has effected his toileting.I am very nervous about the changes my self.

[Guest_16431]

change is really hard...

sorry to read that Mark, and about how your son is imapcted..

hope ur okay.

i can understand it would be very hard and could feel stressful