struggling with special needs children

[Matchy69]

Does anyone else have children with special needs.I am struggling with mine.My youngest cant use a toilet when their at the age they should be.I am getting tired of changing them,does that make me a bad parent?The constant hyperepisodes are taking their strain especially that i am going through other personal stuff in my life

[Boudica]

Hi Mark,

Study is something I do for myself. I enjoy it, but I get behind when I have Blake home for weeks. He was sick 2 weeks this term and I was sick for 1, then I had school holidays, so it has just made it very hard to stay on top of it.

Glad you spent some time in your garden. I am sorry you are feeling sad. It is only natural that you wish some things had been different, as you have had some big setbacks in life. Crying is cathartic.

I hope the new day brings you strength and peace.

[Guest_1643]

Hey Boudaica and Mark,

I admire that you get out and about to help your mood. And wow the vegie garden! How's it looking? Sometimes simple things break up the cycle so well when we feel down.
I like to go to a cafe and read the paper when my mood is low.
It'snot a nice or friendly cafe, but it has a nice outdoor space, which is how I cope.
Hope you are enjoying the lovely weather and feeling okay.

[Matchy69]

Hi Sleepy the day here has turned a bit cold with it becoming overcast and windy after starting of sunny.

Its good to get out in the vegie garden.I always liked growing my own vegies and its good for the kids to get outside in the garden.

There is no cafe in this town only a pub and a post office.When I lived in the city I use to go out once a fortnight for breakfast.

I just have my son at the moment and my daughter is in town with her mother choosing as formal dress and they are going to see a movie.My son's not very active today just in his bed and can't seem to get him to do much.

Take care,

Mark.

[Matchy69]

Is it to much for my ex to pick up our son when she says she will.He gets so upset and thinks isn't coming .She does this everytime and it just gets to me when she is so late and sees how upset my son is.

[Guest_1643]

Hi Mark

do the kids stay together or do they sometimes stay only one at urs and one at ur ex?
What movie did they see today?

I would like to go to the movies tomorrow as a treat for myself. Or maybe I'll wait til Tuesday for half-tix.

So sorry your ex was late and stressed out your son. Hope ur okay, that is upsetting. No one likes waiting and being at some else's mercy.
Hope u enjoyed some time in the sun today amongst nature. We have lots of cafes here and I go to one closest to me but the service is awful.
Today I ordered a chai with soymilk she was shocked "that's a change.... just soy today then?"
"I have it with soy every time" I said
"I always put in regular milk."

she is a terrible communicator lol I definitely said soy, but okay. Depressing place but it has an outdoor area which I go to because it helps my depression to be exposed to the sun. Maybe I have S.A.D (Season Affective disorder).

Sorry to ramble on ur thread. Thinking of u all and hope ur son is okay and got picked up wthout excessive stress on him

[Boudica]

Hi Mark,

Your ex and mine seem to have some things in common, vanishing for one, lateness for another! He used to be late to collect our son even though time was arranged same each time (he showed up consistently an hour late), so I changed the time an hour later, since he was struggling to make it. He then was an hour late for the new time consistently. So now I always deliver him (it is less than 5 minutes drive), on time every time or I txt and explain how late and why (like a normal person!). I don't understand why some people are like this. Almost seems like a game. It is annoying, and it is stressful for an autistic child, who wants routine and predictability.

How was your day aside from the irritation of your exes games?

[Boudica]

Hi Sleepy,

I think I used to be really detrimentally affected by Autumn/winter years ago when I was renting and lived in dark gloomy houses. It made a huge difference to move to a house that is really bright and has lots of windows to the garden, and an easy connection to outside. It really is worth making an effort to get plenty of sunlight, if you think this might be impacting you. Do you have somewhere to sit outside at home? It can be hard for some urbanites in flats. If not could you make a little cheery area with a chair and some pot plants on a balcony?

[Matchy69]

Hi sleepy and Boudica I have no idea I didn't get a chance to speak to my daughter last night as it was really cold when I put my son in the car when he was cranky.She bought a dress and it cost me $129 down from $260.She looks nice in it in the photo I was sent.

The weather and seasons have a lot to do with your mental health.If it is cold and miserable you feel depressed.I remember a motivational speaker saying some people complain it's cold and others will go skiing.Your going to get the cold weather you just need to make the most of it and find away of enjoying yourself even if it is just sitting in front of a fire toast marshmallows.I think you are doing it sleepy by going to a coffee place and sitting in the sun reading the paper.I have made this new garden bed around my water tanks and I have a seat there and it gets full son all day there.I like to pick some mandarins and sit there and eat them and last year was sitting there all day at times.

Take care,

Mark.

[Boudica]

Hello Mark,

How's things? Is your son well enough for school yet? It's great your daughter has her formal to look forward to. She did so well to get through school despite her challenges, as it is often tough if you are a bit different. Times of transition are exciting but can also really bring out anxiety, especially since school is all she would have known so far, how is she coping with it all?

I have to choose a high school for my son soon. I have been on several tours, but it is just so hard to know where he will fit. He has a preferred choice, but it is a special technology school that is difficult to get in to, so I am concerned he will be disappointed. Our local zone school he said was creepy and he did not like the odour (it has carpets in some classrooms, which I feel is not good for allergies /asthma or those who are sensory sensitive like him).

I hope you are having a nice day.

[Matchy69]

Hi Boudica my son is back at school and seems to have recovered ok.Hopefully he has a good day.

My daughter is looking forward to finishing school.She really wants to find a job in the animal care industry.Which will be hard to find and a completely different experience looking for work and not having the safe guard of school.

We only had one choice of high school here as the others are like an hour away including the special needs school.I hope you can find something suitable and it works for you.It is really a big decision with a special needs child.

Take care,

Mark.