Tell us your thoughts - What's kept or keeping you here?

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi everyone,

This is not an easy thread to make but I'm doing it because I think it's important.

I can see that you're all hurting and I know because I'm hurting too. Right now I'm in an easier place but it wasn't that long ago where I wasn't. Often we can find lots of reasons why we don't want to be here, and very few reasons that we do. So I'm making this post to bring everyone together to either find reasons to stay or show me why you've stayed. I don't care whether they are small or big reasons. They are reasons.

Please feel free to post below because I want to hear yours, and I want this to be a thread where people who come here can grab onto a reason too.

The reasons why I chose to stay -

- My dogs.

- Planning to die was very complicated.

- I wanted to hold on just in case things got a little bit better.

and now, I'm glad that I stayed. Please know that while suicide will end the pain, it will end your life too - so you'll say goodbye to any opportunities that things might get better. Opportunities for laughter, joy and beautiful memories. Sometimes it's about staying with the pain and finding other ways to let go of it without saying goodbye to our life.

[Guest_8790]

Dow hill daisy

yes I suppose I have hope but it's fading. just existing at my age. I do have ok days but am so tired of trying. guess I am.better around animals so I am ok with that.

rusty

[Guest_1055]

What's keeping me here is the tiniest light sort of trying to poke through in a skinny stream. It's up above. I think I am in that well. I felt so much emotional pain, tearing at my soul. I cannot deal with it. Only stay here, so I no longer have to feel it. Shut out. The light is hope, that's what I call it. But I feel so tired now and its hard to keep my eyes on the light.

[Paw Prints]

Shelley Anne,

Remember you are not alone in your well. With you are those who will support you when your tired, sit with you when you're in pain & give you a guiding hand toward the light.

Paw Prints

[MsPurple]

Hi everyone

Rusty, have you looked into your courses disability services. I joined my universities disability services in my final year due to my mental health. I was able to get additional support. I suggest looking into this service (see forms on eep study stress or something along those lines)

I felt lost the last few weeks. Really struggled. I finally feel like things are 'finally coming up Millhouse' (simpsons quote) as I was just accepted for Newstart through centrelink and I have started to get interviews and temp work. My family during this stressful time have been supportive which I appreciate and wouldn't have been able to manage without them

[Guest_8790]

why am I still here?
Hello Ms Purple

I Do have disability support at tafe however my self doubts and doing assessments plus role plays has been hard. I have good days then a self doubt day. it is coming up to placement time but teacher thinks I may not be ready
on top of this I am on new start and have to search for 10 jobs a month. have applied for some but no luck. job provider does not assist me when I say I am not sure what job I am looking for. financially worried and feel inadequate against other students who pass assessments first time. just hate been on govt support as had worked 36 years and now.feel lousy had to resort to this. it's humiliating. if it wasn't for pets who knows who cares. ex husband has been supportive but.he has his own life so. life goes on... sort of

rusty

[smallwolf]

Hi Nellym,

Do you have a thread somewhere? While this is a virtual space, you are not alone here. I am listening. Do you want talk about it?

Tim

[IreneM]

What Keeps me Here and Going?

My Therapy has taught me that ...

... I can change how I think.

Situation: I am struggling with my Studies.

Negative Thought: 'I am no good unlike my peers.'

Realistic Thought: 'I am doing the best I can in my current circumstances. If I fail I can always do this or another course next year or term.'

Irene.

[Sophie_M]

It is good to see you back on the forums, Nellym. We're concerned that you're feeling so low right now, and have asked our Support Service to reach out to you via email. In the meantime, we encourage you to create a new thread about how you're feeling to allow more visibility and support from the community. If you feel unable to keep yourelf safe tonight, please call our friends at Lifeline on 13 11 14 or attend the emergency room of your nearest hospital.

[smallwolf]

Hi NellyM,

I’m sorry you’ve been feeling so awful. I’m so glad you’re still here. You know this forum is a safe place to chat. I hope you chat some more?

Peace and comforting thoughts to you,

Tim

[MsPurple]

HI everyone

Rusty I get it. I questioned whether I was eligible. I went to headspace and gave my therapist the paperwork. He thought I was already with the service. All you have to do is get the paperwork filled out and book an appointment with disability services. I know it is scary, but you have nothing to lose trying, except more understanding and compassion. I found them absolutely lovely when I applied for it.

Nellym I am glad you are still here. Around 2 weeks ago I had a really bad depression day. I was wanting to look into my options regarding mental health care that bulk billed (between jobs). I find them helpful. I called the acute mental health team at MH health (google it maybe one in your area). They helped talk to me about the services they offer and called me for the next few days to check in on me. It was really helpful at the time. I didn't need to go in but still helpful to know that there was something when I was distressed. I hope you feel like you can call someone like this or lifeline or beyond blue. Sophie has given some suggestions on what to do if distressed. If you want to chat about anything on here feel free to share

I sometimes keep going because I have hope. Hope there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Sometimes in great stress we can stop believing there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I know I felt this way. It is good to write out a safety plan. Who to call if feeling in deep distress. People to be around in times of needing safety. May never need to use the safety plan but it is good to have