Really struggling to continue life.

[em35353]

I am currently struggling to find a reason to continue to live my life. Everyday is a battle against staying here for the sake of my family and pushing through my sad and sorry life. I have no true friends at school and everyone either doesn't know who I am, thanks to my social anxiety and therefore extreme quietness and shyness, or takes the complete piss out of me as a person with their friends. I am sick of living my life. I don't find joy in anything anymore. I have good grades and all but I don't feel proud of who am I am at all. I am sick of being so socially anxious, it truly ruins my life. Thanks to my social anxiety people think I am weird and stay away. I have the worst stutter when I am anxious and it is so dehumanizing when I try to make new friends. No one cares about me and it would make no difference if i am gone or not. I hate myself and my life so much, sometimes I get this feeling that something is crushing my chest I want it all to end so bad. I just want someone to listen and not judge me for these messed up feelings as its not realy something you can just tell anyone who asks if I am okay.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this. I already appreciate that you did so.

[Sophie_M]

Dear em35353,

Thank you so much for taking this brave first step in reaching out for help.

We are sorry to hear you are struggling so much right now and hope you find the forums to be of help. You've come to a good place where people give and receive support to one another based on their own experiences with mental health.

In the meantime, our support service is trying to reach you by email as we are worried about you.

Please know help is always available to you, Em. While the forums are a great source of peer support to many, if you think you are in need of more immediate support than the forums can provide, please don't hestitate to reach out to us anytime 24/7 on 1300 22 4636 or our friends at Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800.

Welcome to the forums! Please check in and let us know how you're getting on whenever you feel up to it.

[josh174]

I'm in the same boat. I'm just about to hopefully graduate high school yet I don't know even know what to do with my life. All through high school I've just been that one kid who does their own thing and people comment on that and say that I am just good at getting along with myself but no one really knows how I feel and I don't have a close enough connection with my friends to tell them how I feel. The one job I wanted is a dying career and the one passion I have is terrible for the environment. I don't know what to do with myself and am struggling with even the thought of going into the exam rooms. I never wanted to go to Uni and I feel like the world is out to get me. I don't know what I want to do and I just want to get out. Sorry if this just feels like a rant but I haven't had anyone to talk to as I don't feel comfortable talking to my family as my sister and father already have their own disputes which further add to my stress and and anxiety. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

[mocha delight]

Hi em35353 I may not be diagnosed yet but I am on antidepressants and see a psychologist who has told me I have both social & general anxiety as well as depression so I know a little bit of what your going through. I’ve not been told that they think I’m weird but that’s pretty normal in both sides of my family at the very least minimum of everything else of how I’d describe my family so it’s nothing new to me.

[Helarctus]

Hello Em35353,

This is not an excuse, but an explanation;

Growing up through school and high school can be especially rough, in part because the other people you are going through the process with are all growing up at the same time as you and likely do not realise the impact their behaviour is having on you or others around them.

Things can get better and most likely will get better of their own accord as everyone matures and grows. I hope you can find some things of joy for yourself, no matter how small, in time you will find others who share similar joys and friends through and through.

A quote which may help with the stresses of the moment;

" grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." Reinhold Niebuhr