Help needed

[Farmer680]

Hi it’s a long story so I will keep it short as possible I am a farmer and also work in a hospital as a cleaner I have worked hard 7 days a week for 35 years, we opened our farm up to foster children so we. could teach them farm life something they would never experience ,we done it for ten years had two in permanent care one is still with us one 16 year old girl done a runner and took off and has made up false allegations against me no charges have been laid yet I went to court 2 months a go I now have to go back in four days I I am so scared can’t sleep properly sever anxiety I have never done a single thing wrong in my life have thought about suicide nearly every day I have even googled the fastest way to die,two people I worked with both committed suicide 4 years a go. I love my family and the foster child that Is still staying with us knows her twin sister is lying, I am so scared I will go to jail for something I didn’t do so suicide really is the only way out for me, who is going to believe a 57 year old man what do I do the stress is so bad it’s effecting my work.

[Farmer680]

Hi I rang another Lawyer for some extra advice he said legal aid must be reported to the IBAC for misuse of money amd funding someone who is clearly playing games using the system whoever they are he said after 4 intervention orders it should have been red-flagged i told him this has been going on for over 12 months he couldn't believe it, the only reason I am strong is my two friends who committed suicide I keep thinking of them as there were no warning signs at all they were happy as anything when I talked to them last next thing they were gone. I am about 7 out of 10 but trying to fight it and stay strong anxiety is 24/7 we just want it to end so I can get a job and be back like a normal family like it used to be my wifes foot is better not a 100% but better than it was.

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear Farmer...

You have and are going through so much wrong done to you..I have followed your journey since you first posted...

Farmer...the new lawyer who you rang for advice..seems to be able to see through this young girl and that she is abusing the legal aid system...I hope that either you or the new lawyer do report what’s going on...

Farmer....Please..continue to hold on..and stay strong...for you, your wife, your 2 beautiful friends and your family and friends....What this girl is doing is so wrong...and I’m certain that courts will see through her lies....

I am pleased to hear your wife’s foot is better now...

Farmer...anxiety can take over our day to days lives...I can understand anxiety so well...it’s been my constant shadow now for many years...I’m sorry your also struggling with that so much....Is it possible for you to sit outside on your veranda or under a tree...(I love trees)...and try some mindfulness practise...looking at the things around you...hearing the sounds of nature..smelling the freshness of the autumn air...touching the grass around you...while sipping on a beverage of your liking.....I know it doesn’t take anxiety away for ever...but while practicing mindfulness it gives our overactive mind and tensed up body a little bit of relief, so we can gain some extra strength....

Sitting with you lovely Farmer, holding on to you with my care and friendship....

Grandy...

[demonblaster]

Hey good man Farmer 🌿

Some good bits of news there I'm pleased you got extra advice and fully agree with dear Grandy that this needs reporting. Excellent you have info on where to report this insanity to. I'm hopeful that might be the beginning to a growing spark of light to end this rot. Completely understanding you all want and certainly need this rubbish and vindictive treatment to be over.

I have no idea how it works but maybe a question to your lawyer is there any way of even getting part compensation for the bucket loads of money you've out laid. May not be possible but worth an ask. Innocent people being accused of lies and the mh pain and disruption being so devastating if not there should be some thing in place.

I admire your honour and respect to your dear friends standing strong and holding it together with those poor souls leaving under such sad wrong circumstances. I've said before I'd think you're helping many people speaking openly and honestly as you do. Heartbreaking.

Fab news about your wifes foot. I imagine in the area of farm life and home hopings back to normal or close to.

As always great suggestions from our lovely Grandy. It really does help the head having a change of scenery and observation of the beauty in the outdoors that I imagine you'd have appreciation of living on the land. My partner and I two days running did exactly that. It was a great lift. Feeling the wind blow on your face through the hair, we need any escape regardless of how small. Anxiety it's terrible.

7 out of 10's mighty. If you don't mind me repeating about deep breathing too. It does help with tension which doesn't allow oxygen to get enough to our bodies and brain. Also by focusing on breathing only is a good help disrupting the depressive thoughts and feelings.

I've often wondered what sort of animals you have if you feel like talking about them ok if not ☺

Just had a lovely thought that you might get pleasure from is I imagine you have a beautiful spread of stars on a good night. Something magical about seeing the vast beauty of the universe at night. It's helped me at times no end. Something so tranquil and peaceful. Calming.

As always Farmer and family you're never alone here matey and in real life. You have much love around you and friends here and in your home life. Hold onto that Mr Farner and keep fighting the good fight 👊

🌿

[Farmer680]

Thank you everyone I honestly don’t know what I would do if I never had anyone to talk too it’s hard enough now,I often look up at the millions of stars and pray for this nightmare to be over I told the lawyer I got advice from that I lost my job of 21 years he said has she gone that far, I said must have, he gave us a few names to email and tell them re legal aid so my daughter will do that she’s good with computers. on the farm we have 300 sheep poll Dorset, geese chooks ducks two dogs, a huge veggie garden we cut grass hay every year for people with horses we even give hay away to people who are struggling to buy feed for there livestock,I help people when I can I teach people if they don’t know how to do something I will show them, I really liked my job only to be made redundant,I just seem to be struggling with everyday life now it’s like I don’t care anymore, she knows the system she knows her lawyer is free and she knows she can tell her lawyer anything and she will believe it, it doesn’t worry the lawyer she still gets paid so she will keep turning up at court even though she probably knows it’s not right. thank you everyone for commenting it’s much appreciated

[demonblaster]

Hey Farmer Grandy and everyone ☺

I'm glad it's helping being able to talk. It's a release not of all stress but at least taking some of the load off.

Just jumping in to let you know I've read your last post and am coming back. Same goes anytime if I don't reply I'll be back.
You're stuck with me matey 😄

Rainy here I always think it must be the same everywhere. I guess its good for you on the farm for the lawns and veg garden sounds amazing.

Should be back later (bbl) today ☺

Catch you then 🌿

[Farmer680]

Hi We spoke to the lady that lost her husband due to false allegations which were proven to be false, she said there is no law in place for the person who made false allegations against her husband you have to prove he did it because of the allegations that’s so wrong they were a happy family she said the law sucks the world will be dominated by teenagers because they know the system looks after them, sorry if I talk to much I wish it was like the old days where children treated people with respect my mother when she was alive said treat your elders with respect and that’s exactly what we did. I need to keep my mind off it all the time it’s wrecking me

[demonblaster]

Mr Farmer hey matey and readers ☺

I nearly made it back yesterday it's late so just a quicky for now.

First up budz don't feel you're talking too much. Not at all this is what here's about. A safe place for people to talk without judgement.
I like that you're talking more so we know where you're at and that you're getting some release.

I was thinking tonight now this would take some practice but worth a try.
Thinkings what hurts about the situation tho it'd be so much easier not to solutions would be harder to find including getting support and help.

Wondering if you could work at allowing thinking time for certain periods of the day.
Possibly some time in the morning because that's the time we're clearest in the mind. If we get sleep it's our strongest time.

When thoughts barge through in the other times gently breathe deep a few times allowing calm then tell yourself I'll think about that later.
Then refocus on the task at hand.

If you can give yourself some time through the day I know you'd be busy to work on you time.
You might like to do with your family or alone that's your call

You might like to talk to your dear Mum Farmer

Maybe play the guitar.

Walk

Take pen to paper

Paint.

Wouldn't matter if its not a masterpiece. Scribbling or painting can be a powerful stress release.
Just let the pen/brush lead the way.

I'm so glad you look at the stars and pray. They give us a spectacular show don't they.

See you sometime soon good man

Thoughts and care Farmer and family 🌿

[Farmer680]

Thank you I got paid out from work but never seen any of it had to go to our lawyer but that’s ok at least I don’t have to sell anymore stuff for a while, hopefully i will find another job I told my lawyer why didn’t the organisation tell us in training all this could happen false allegations ect ect he said no one would foster care if they did which is true we wouldn’t of we had no support from the organisation in the ten years at least if it was told in training people could prepare themselves if anything did happen,I just need to get my mind right,after losing my job that I actually liked it’s been so hard she is mentally not right to go that far I will keep struggling along thank you

[demonblaster]

Hi Farmer I haven't forgotten you 🙂

I'll bbl (be back later) sometime just wanted you to know I've read your last post. Up to date.

Pretty full on here at home getting sorted to move.

Eyes are falling out of my head. I'll just stick em in my handbag and boogie off to bed matey.

Remember talk anytime ok. 👋 cya 🌿

[demonblaster]

Farmer good man hi to readers 👋

Heya what a shame you didn't see any of the payout although one positive that we need to focus on as much as possible in these rotten times is I imagine it'd be even a small load off paying some to your lawyer.
Really good not needing to sell for a while. It's not fair matey at all.

From the small chunks I hear at times you included the law has a long way to go towards protecting the victims.
So much added stress on already insane dealings.

You have a strong sense of survival Farmer man you've pulled up enough to get through and up each morning. Kudos fella that takes the strength of an Ox.

I love hearing you say you'll look for another job. I really hope some light comes in to take the financial pressure off.
You're doing right by yourself trying when you start looking which opens opportunity. Oh yeah it'll take time healing from the job loss. It bites. Let's hope there's something around the corner. Often one door clises another opens.

I'm unsure when to mention this.
Just something to consider and possibly you may not understandably want to pursue and of course now wouldn't be at all the time to if you do chose to.

Was wondering if down the track when the dust settles if you think you'd be wanting to do maybe not a class action if that's the terminology or a group action to work towards changing the laws to have support in place for foster families. Pro bono would be the best scenario of course.
There'splenty of proof it's needed and certainly sounds like a case that needs desparate attention.
If you're interested to support that someone else might lead it if not you.
Often I'd think, things don't get changed until challenged.
Anyway I know nows what needs your full attention.

Does the items you've sold affect the daily running of the farm? As in making more work for youse.Hope not but suspect yes.

As always hoping on hope you're able to at least have some lighter moments in your day that give you a break in thoughts and reason to smile.

Always support Mr Farmer man and to your family too.

See you later 😊⚘ an everlasting Rose for your wife and daughter.

Take care 🌿