Hi Rothman,
You are a blessed soul, Rothman.
Your dad sounds like mine! - want to swap? (I'd put a lol in here but there is nothing funny about it). You are so considerate to carry on and, despite everything detestable about him, you are doing the right thing by caring. You know, sometimes the behaviour elderly parents exhibit is not what they feel deep inside, but it still hurts deeply when they act selfishly and abhorrently - and that sense of entitlement you mentioned... argh!
Remember, you are the bigger person here, and I give you my utmost respect for all you are doing... and suffering. When my dad is being uncooperative, I just walk off to let him think about it a bit - usually he is in a better frame of mind on my return.
Your boyfriend needs you - you are all he's got; and your dad needs you even though you are unappreciated. Sorry, Rothman, you are just too valuable and precious!
For my own sanity and self respect, I try to have strict rules on conduct and routine - no arguments. Sometimes it backfires and I mess up, but it reinforces who is helping whom - and that is most important for me to continue.
Without disrespecting your father, there are conditions and limits I think you could impose (gradually) to make that aspect of your life a little less miserable.
Please talk more with me on your thoughts.
Kindest regards,
t.
