Suicidal thoughts and self-harm

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Do you have a safety plan?

replies: 97

Safety planning involves creating a structured plan – ideally with support from your health professional or someone you trust – that you work through when you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts, feelings, distress or crisis. Your safety plan starts with things you can do by yourself, such as thinking about your reasons to live and distracting yourself with enjoyable activities. It then moves on to coping strategies and people you can contact for support – your friends, family and health professionals. The safety planning model was developed in the US by suicide prevention experts Barbara Stanley and Gregory Brown. It has been used extensively by US veterans’ health organisations, hospital emergency departments and high schools, and there is strong evidence that it works. Many health professionals in Australia also use some form of safety planning to support clients experiencing suicidal thoughts or feelings, or after a suicide attempt. beyondblue has an app you can use to create a safety plan, called BeyondNow. The BeyondNow app takes the principles of safety planning and makes it even easier to use – so rather than carrying around a piece of paper, you’ve got it on your phone at all times. It’s free to download from the Apple Store or Google Play. If you don’t have a smartphone or would prefer to use your desktop or laptop, BeyondNow is also available to use on our website. Do you have a safety plan? Do you have questions around how you might create one, or fill out some of the sections? This thread is for discussing ideas around creating a safety plan, and sharing tips about what has been most useful about this process for you. Below are two videos featuring Peter and Nic, who have both used safety plans successfully. Peter Nic

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section

replies: 0

Life gets pretty hard sometimes and many people in this online community have had times where they have thought about hurting themselves or ending their life. This can be a stressful and at times overwhelming experience, and this section is here to help members who have had these experiences. This is a place to share where you are at, seek ideas for help and know that you are not alone. We are here to create a safe environment for everyone. Please do not provide any details about any plans/ideas that you may have had to hurt yourself, and importantly, help us to understand if you are safe by letting us know in the post. Making comments that let us know that you are having thoughts, but are safe, helps us to know that your conversation can continue without interruption, and that we do not need to put any further follow up for you in place. This section will not be for everyone.It shows posts from people who are distressed, offers public replies to these posts, and encourages people to come back and share how they got past that difficult point in time - what worked, what didn’t and how they now approach these difficult thoughts. It is important to think about what you want from the forums, what information you need and what threads will be helpful to your situation, rather than reading everything that is posted. For some people this section might be difficult to read – if it is not helping how you feel, then please consider moving to another section. This section, like the rest of our forums, is closely monitored and all posts are reviewed by moderators before publication. Moderators will also ensure that anyone needing follow up will be provided with information about how to access further support. This section remains a discussion forum focused on helping each other through the dark times, it is not a crisis support service. Any posts that do not abide by the community rules will not be published. Unlike other areas of the forum, threads in this section will be closed after a period of one month of inactivity. If you are in crisis or need immediate help, assistance is not available via these forums. Please call Suicide Call Back 1300 659 467, Lifeline 13 11 14 or contact emergency services on 000.

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Am I really suicidal

replies: 4

Hi, I recently lost my best friend, my beautiful, loving and kind mum in March of this year. I wish I had died with her. We communicated daily, she was always there for me and I for her. I am 41 years old, no kids. I am already on anti-depressants for depression/anxiety/PTSD. Resultant of earlier childhood trauma and teenage issues. I was mums carer for the last 18months since she was diagnosed with cancer. I spend my waking hours (which is a lot as I can only seem to manage sleep from about 5am to 9am), just being tremendously sad and crying and wishing she was here, or that I was with her. I have suicidal thoughts. However, I feel if I was going to commit suicide I would have already done it. I also feel that as I am a person who loves organising/planning things to the last detail that the fact I have a suicide plan all worked out is not that much of a risk indicator for me, as I love to plan many things even if I never do them (ex: holidays, house renovations). I guess what I am asking is, is my suicidal thoughts just a cry for help/attention or do I really think I could kill myself? I just don’t know how to live without my mum, life doesn’t seem right/good anymore without her in it. Thanks for any replies.

Will never be good enough

replies: 3

I will start by reassuring that I have no intentions of harming myself, but I did feel that this section of the forums was the most fitting. I believe that I will never be good enough for this world, well actually just society. As a living breathing animal I am enough. Some days that's all that keeps me going, literally just survival of the flesh. There are so many pressures in this world! I had a sh*tty upbringing and consequently I have c-ptsd. It's hard just getting from moment to moment sometimes, let alone meeting the never ending expectations of having a job, being perfect looking, having amazing hobbies, having lots of friends, owning lots of fancy things, changing the world for the better... I swear the expectations grow each year. I haven't worked in over 5 years. My anxiety is crippling. I've just had a baby and hate myself that I don't work, I surely am not good enough to have a baby if I can't work, right? Inside I am an overwhelmed mess to the point that I feel defeated, numb... I honestly feel like I would be better off dead (what a relief!) and that the world and my loved ones would be better off without me. I don't believe I am depressed. Just realistic. What worth do I have in this world? I am just a burden, a drain on the precious resources that have been designated only to the lucky ones who grew up able to function in this circus. Who gets to decide what is enough?

Numb

replies: 4

Hi, I’m struggling with the new restrictions and not knowing how long this is going on for and if it will ever get different. I’ve worked really hard to see a future and now it’s all different again. I’d just got to a point where I actually had something to look forward to and see family I love that I haven’t seen for 3 years and now when I think about what I see in the future, there’s nothing. If I let myself get attached or look to the future, life happens and I get hurt. I try not to get attached but that doesn’t really work out either. There’s so much happening around and there are other trauma anniversaries coming up and then it’s non binary day today. I’m just a bit overloaded. Sorry for the rant.

How do you know if you’re at risk of suicide?

replies: 4

I’ve been having a pretty tough time the last 6 or so weeks. There are times when I am very depressed. Sometimes I string a long a couple of good days but it’s rare. Most days are tough. Im often occupied with thoughts of why do I even bother continuing to live when it is so unpleasant? Why do I feel like I have nothing to live for? I look and see people who are happy and content and ask myself why I don’t have that. What is making them happy and me so miserable? What do I have to do to enjoy life? Hence the title for this thread how do you know if you’re at risk of suicide? If you feel you have nothing to live for and that you’d be better off dead than alive are you suicidal? I suppose because when truly suicidal you end it you don’t get to relive and learn from that experience because it’s over so how do you know what and when that feeling is? In terms of feeling safe yes right now I am safe.

Help for a friend

replies: 2

My dear friend's (E) beautiful 15 yr old daughter (H) has started self-harming. H started becoming withdrawn about 6 months ago and E has managed to get her to see a psychologist once, but she refuses to go again. H is very angry with her mum, and E has asked me to try and talk to her. H and I are close, but I would hate to say the wrong thing. I would appreciate any advice. Thanks, a very worried friend.

Beyond Crap Parent's Part 1

replies: 1

I have been under the mental scrutiny of my Dad's In different personality, which for all my life was a genuine Irritation and now It's a lasting mental Insecurity despite It being a reality, Just a relationship, with small talk or occasional chatter or otherwise absent to their own, without genuine hate for each other, Just a different psychology, generation and national relation perspective, I can't like my father beyond In different value's or virtue's, because He has Insecurities that He can't understand as Insecure, He also Is a different political opinion and breed of masculine personality and He would undermine my political beliefs, His 100% average and conventional and overly Australian, I don't like my Father because He has always guilted your psychology to become a adult, or to be Intelligent, or that your caution Is Just anxiety, He can be financially protective and He can be In considerate and selfish and He Is under confident or comfortable with knowing how to talk to His Kid's briefly or about nothing In relation to feeling's or Man to Man or LIFE, He never cared about His kid's off spring, He Just made u feel your supposed to be the world for going to a normal private High School, or that His the best Dad for generically paying the house hold bill's, and especially because your now over 18. He would always say that u have missed the boat and u will be homeless since our early 20's, He would see u as the same as u special weird selective cousin's He never listened to His kid's and He would never value any In difference or opinion over His own, and my Co - dependent Mother would always over look your Father resent because she was vague and grateful and un appreciated otherwise fair Co - existent mostly and within a Healthy otherwise marriage without daily drama's My Father think's I'm SPECIAL, and If I don't like Him I'm abused mentally to leave home, despite never having direction, Payed Work History and being without my driving, He undermines the need for me to DRIVE, and to catch Public Transport, I'm not on good term's with my Brother too, My Father Is a standard Narcissist to undermine me as " Young " My Parent's were disgusting to never BELIEVE In my Intelligence, or encourage my Interest's, they could Ignore a Year x 10 without me being employed or within study, My Dad killed my Individuality all through, and my creative personality, and social esteem I never liked Australia for lot of reason's, To the U.S.A. despite their problem's

Hi! I'm new here, this is my first post!

replies: 4

Hi, I'm ToadsPond97, I'm new here, this is my first post, here's a bit about me: I have/think I have anxiety, I have self-harmed three times before (not badly though), I am a minor, I like reading and writing, I hate myself, I think school holidays a... View more

I can’t sleep

replies: 2

I am currently too overwhelmed to fall asleep, and so i just want to vent a bit. it is terrifying. i am currently applying into a new school- and only now do i realise the amount of stairs they have (context: i am scared of stairs due to persisting suicidal thoughts) i love the buildings- 100%, it looks amazing.. but i dont think i will cope regularly moving along them. maybe its just the stress thats making me think like this// but either way, my heart beats faster around them. im scared the adrenaline would make me want to do it. i am depressed- more times than not am i often sad- or even a hollow husk of who i used to be (or… masked to be) i dont want this adrenaline to be my death. im scared (by the time ive finished this message, ive calmed down, im going to try to sleep again) hopefully this follows the terms and conditions…

Crazy mood swings

replies: 4

Hi There. I am currently experiencing extreme mood swings. I am fine one minute then suicidal the next. I have been out today for social engagements which I enjoyed. Then I get home and my mood has plunged through the floor and I feel like I want to act on my feelings of suicide. I attempted suicide a few years ago and spent some time in the hospital. Up until the start of this year I had a psychiatrist, psychologist and support group but I quit them all as I was doing ok. Still depressed but manageable. Since then I have had cancer twice and knocked myself out at work giving me concussion for 2 weeks and ongoing neck pain. I work as a casual but there has been no work for the last 2 weeks. I am struggling to get through the day. Any advice or response would be appreciated. Thanks

What helps me/us/you survive, discussion welcome: Please DO REPLY.

replies: 8

G'day everyone - party hard and welcome to this thread, I hope you find something useful here, or share something useful too. 11.52 am 9/7/2021, I am safe, I've got shelter, warmth, food and water, friends and family and good dogs! But really I am not safe because if centrelink is ever to cut my benefits, I would rapidly become broke, unable to pay for food/water/shelter or medical expenses. So every time centrelink sends out one of their letters about request for information and informs me of consequences under social policy acts, they inadvertently threaten my very survival. So I snap to, and do exactly what they say I must do. I am centrelinks' slave to their paperwork. They think they're helping but really every communication from them to me is painful. I need their money, not their BS. So every once in a while, for whatever reason I find I am nearly unable to cope and I've got to stand up and say "I can't do this any more" and in my experience, the only language that centrelink understands and acts upon is expressions about ideation of suicide. And, nope I don't set about to make up my feelings regarding suicide, I seek to more clearly define them and share them with complete utter strangers who have no idea. Now I'll give advice to beyondblue. Every time bb send me a do-not-reply email, I absolutely hate that! Stop it! Feel free to contact me, but stop sending me do not reply emails. That's what centrelink does, it demands things, threatens things and says "do not reply"! Do not reply is the poorest of communications. It is a power imbalance, do not reply intensifies isolation. Do not reply makes me feel violent! Damn that feeling. Damn that language. I remain safe, my wife is next to me, she's safe too. beyondblue is a good place, pretty much the only forum where I feel comfortable sharing these things online. Thanks for listening. So I ask others: What power or benefit can you gain from these unpleasant thoughts? This is a question about surviving and really needs consideration.

Do you have a safety plan? replies: 97

PLEASE READ THIS FIRST: posting in this section replies: 0

Am I really suicidal replies: 4

Will never be good enough replies: 3

Numb replies: 4

How do you know if you’re at risk of suicide? replies: 4

Help for a friend replies: 2

Beyond Crap Parent's Part 1 replies: 1

Hi! I'm new here, this is my first post! replies: 4

I can’t sleep replies: 2

Crazy mood swings replies: 4

What helps me/us/you survive, discussion welcome: Please DO REPLY. replies: 8