Many of us struggle here just to get out of bed, get kids off to school and even minor tasks. That state, the one we struggle with, wrestle with and seek comfort from others, is mental illness whereby your will, desires, dreams are slow to achieve.
However, our attitudes from poor to good are fully achievable within a reasonable time frame and it can only come from you. A change in attitude can turn around a number of things. You might have a poor attitude towards your carer because he/she is the only person present most of the time and you attitude is that because they are in the firing line- they should cop it. STOP NOW. Change your attitude because a/ it is hard to put up with and b/ your relationship could be terminal and the most important- c/ its wrong and its your doing.
Long relationships, marriages that have lasted over 20 years seem , from my observation, to have the worst attitudes towards each other. It is a clear case of taking their partners for granted and their attitudes are often full of contempt for the other person. It like its a case of years and years of being with each other has formed a resentment that is hard to change. Relationships are a work in progress. Once the work stops the spark is put out. No spark and there is little happiness.
Changing your attitude from this form of negativity is hard. Firstly you need to erase all past issues, conflicts, arguments and the like. Then reignite your relationship with some romance and care. This "care" can be as little as returning a question they have asked you daily "r u ok"? If your partner is your carer then they likely deserve all of this new found attention for their journey with you has been and continues to be, a hard one due to illness.
But overall attitude change from bad to good, can change your life. Again, I'm not referring to mental illness and its restrictions. I'm talking about what you are capable of. So you might have to dig deep to separate what is effected by illness and what is bad attitude.
A change in attitude has a snowball effect. It can enlighten your partner to make them feel more positive too. They in turn feel better that your approach to them has improved, you are showing respect, care and pride. You appreciate them working when you cannot. Their happiness lifts you too without you realising it sometimes. And if you have children, you would be moving their home life closer towards a 'normal' household.
Dad is sick but he now smiles at us. That's gold.
