Dear Shell
I think the dreamlike state can be a way of protecting ourselves from difficult emotions. I’ve certainly felt myself split off into that state when emotionally overwhelmed and it can have a feeling of unreality.
Sometimes we don’t always feel able to connect with the people we live with. I can’t remember from earlier things you’ve said, but do you feel you have any support elsewhere such as via a therapist or friend or relative? A good therapist you feel comfortable with may be able to help you process what you’re experiencing. They can often help with grounding techniques.
I have just a few relatives and friends I can call who I don’t necessarily feel able to go into depth about my own struggles with, but I find even just chatting with them on the phone can be grounding and I feel differently afterwards, like I’m less lost and more present.
Sometimes we don’t have words for feelings too and that’s ok. I think it’s not unusual to have difficulty naming emotions, especially when we drift into that dreamlike state as a kind of self-protection. It could possibly be grief at some level, which can be protracted at times. Hopefully it becomes clearer for you.
I agree with you there is a spiritual dimension, and I say that as a non-religious person (I don’t have a particular faith). But I think there is a realm where we feel connected to all things and in that realm our pain can heal. It’s like our emotional being and nervous system heal there.
I think when we feel genuinely seen and understood by another, that can be the catalyst to go into that transformative space. It’s like we shift into a different gear. There still might be more healing to unfold, but it’s like we’ve entered a space where that starts to occur naturally.
I don’t know if that makes sense? It’s kind of what I’m currently experiencing. I hope that helps a bit. Take care 🙏
