Talking to your inner critic, can it be tamed?

[quirkywords]

Do you have an inner critic ? Have you ever tried to talk to your inner critic. This is what happened when I tried. In my Be yourself thread people asked about how I interviewed my inner critic. So here it is.

This is adapted from a writing exercise to interview your inner critic about one's writing. As my inner critic has an opinion all aspects of my life I decided to broaden the scope of the interview.

Me: I welcome (well I don't really) this opportunity to find out why you always need to have an opinion that is always negative about me and my life.

IC: I thought this was going to be a friendly interchange of ideas but there you go with your anger and hostile remarks. I do not see myself as negative but as helping you, because you do need help.

I am here to help you why can't you see that?

Me: So when I am trying to sleep and you tell me about all my mistakes, embarrassing moments, how does that help me?

IC: I thought while you are in bed you would have time to consider some of your past behaviours. This I feel will only help you to improve.

Me: If you are so helpful why do I feel so worthless, so sad, so ignorant when you are around? Do you really know how low I can feel when you are constantly telling me all my faults?

IC: You make yourself feel that way- I am merely pointing out the truth. It is not my problem that you are so weak.

Me: Maybe this was a bad idea you are never going to listen to me or understand me.

IC: Have you ever thought that maybe you shouldn't listen to me if I upset you so much.

Me How can I ignore you when you are so loud at times.

IC: See this is what I mean you are so weak. You have the power to ignore me, to silence me but all you do is whinge and complain.

Me: I am ending this interview. Enough is enough.

What would you say to your inner critic and what do you want to hear from your inner critic? Maybe you can have a go at interviewing your inner critic.

Quirky

[Emotions26]

A quick reply as have an appointment.

Eagle Ray, humour overtaking that pesky dominating inner critic is  a game that I enjoy.

It can go off in some weird and wonderful directions that are imagination running freely.

The more bizarre and hilarious, ridiculous the more stomped the inner critic prattle is.

I love this.

I hope that you slept well and all else.

I didn't as I had a zoom meeting that went until late and my mind was overactive.

There is always tonight.

Ciao

Ems

[quirkywords]

Hello every one 

I used to put my inner critic in a soundproof room. 
zI find listening  to a baby or toddler laugh helps and calms me.
Thanks for all your posts 

[Eagle Ray]

Hi Ems, Quirky and All,

 I hope you got a better night’s sleep last night EMS. I understand about the overactive mind. That happens to me too if I have something like that late before bed. I didn’t sleep well either because of a migraine that came on and went through last night as well, but much improving and I expect to sleep well tonight as exhausted. I agree, the more ridiculous the scenario for the inner critic, the more it seems to work, especially if it makes you laugh out loud at the absurdity 😂

Quirky, I couldn’t agree with you more about babies and toddlers laughing. Quite a few weeks ago I was inside a cafe and there was a baby outside the window in a pram doing that thing babies do where they stare at you. So I smiled at the baby who smiled back. I kept smiling and waving and she started laughing. It was fun and totally lifts your spirits, and the inner critic can’t get a look in. I like your idea of the soundproof room. I have imagined putting unwanted baggage (which could include the inner critic) on a raft on a fast flowing river and letting it rapidly disappear downstream.

Hope you are all doing well.

[Emotions26]

The soundproof room cracked me up Quirky.

Babies crying reaches me deep inside. I want to pick them up and rock them.

I now have a roof rack, a soundproof room and drop off as strategies for the inner c....c. I refuse to  even name it today as it has been working overtime.

More sleep please.

Sleep well folk.

Ems

[Emotions26]

How about walking in nature and picturing a bird swooping down carrying the inner critic off into the clouds.

For a while at least.

Someone else's turn.

Ems

[Eagle Ray]

Yes, excellent idea Ems!

Another option could be putting it in a suitcase and sending it off on an international flight on a year-long round the world trip. Maybe while overseas it will have some enriching, learning experiences and come back a new being - wiser and much less critical.

Another could be putting it in a barrel and rolling it down a hill, whereby it rolls into a river in the valley and then is taken all the way out to sea. Ahhh, that feels better. Relief.

ER

[quirkywords]

Some find listening to their inner couch and not inner critic works. 

[Eagle Ray]

I love the idea of an inner couch Quirky!

[Emotions26]

Good morning Eagle Ray,

Putting the critic in the suitcase and sending it off on an international flight on a year long round the world trip.

My immediate reaction. I will go on the year long world round trip once I work out how my inner critic can advise me how to pay for it since it always has so much to say. Would it come back enriched, wiser and less critical?

The one that persists on bothering me has tunnel vision. I do like the idea of putting it into a suitcase and perhaps sending it off somewhere isolated just in case the muffled sound coming from within the case be overheard. Yes even better with the barrel. In the case first padlocked and locked with a code. Case then inserted in barrel. A nice aged oak barrel containing liquid that might change the conversation! I will try to picture a bobbing barrel bouncing off piers and driftwood as it surfs the waves. Should put a camera inside to be able to check on it's whereabouts. Now I sound as though I am starting to lose the plot. No not really I let my imagination go wherever it wants to. Yes that feeling of relief is wonderful.

Gosh, I just noticed your initials are ER

Thank you ER from Ems.

[Emotions26]

Hello Quirky,

Listening to their inner couch and not inner critic gave me an idea.

Great suggestion.

We could put the inner critics on the couch and have them go through therapy.

What do you think of that idea?