Self care for people with demanding schedules/busy lives

[Peppermintbach]

Hi all,

I thought that it might be helpful to have a thread to share self care strategies especially for those of us who often feel time-poor with demanding schedules/busy lives.

I understand everyone is different, and like most things in life, self care also needs to be individualised to suit each of our individual needs, interests, personalities and lifestyles.

I’ll be back later to contribute my own ideas...

Please feel free to share your own self care strategies and suggestions 🙂

Kind thoughts,

Pepper

[Peppermintbach]

Hi all,

Here are some of my personal suggestions. They may or may not be helpful or suit you but I figured there is little harm in sharing ideas 🙂

• schedule in self care and try your best to commit to it almost as though it was an appointment. I suppose the idea is to make sure you follow through as it is quite easy to think “oh, I don’t have time” if you don’t schedule it in. It could be 30 minutes daily, a weekly activity, etc; it just depends on what works best for you.
• I feel morning rituals can be helpful especially if you know you have a busy day ahead of you e.g. spending 15 minutes to complete a pleasant, calming activity before heading out the door to start your day on a more peaceful note.
• be very efficient/speedy with unpleasant but necessary tasks and chores and think of shortcuts to complete them faster. Alternatively, if finances permit, you could even outsource some of them. Think of it as spending money in order to save that time to do something much more self nurturing or rewarding. Having said that though, I understand this is not an option for everyone.
• breathing exercises can be completed anywhere and help bring forth a calmer state in the here and now.

Kind thoughts,

Pepper

[Elizabeth CP]

I find printing a to do list each week helful with space to tick of daily tasks & also write in what I've done each day. By using a template on the computer you can allow tasks not completed one week to roll over to the next but not having to worry about forgetting them. 

Writing what you have done each day helps keep things in perspective so at the end of the week instead of seeing a list of things not done you are reminded of what you did do. This is important for me as I'm a carer so things often crop up sending my plans haywire. 

Your suggestions pepper are good

[Peppermintbach]

Hi Elizabeth,

Thank you so much for your helpful ideas 🙂

Oh yes, I agree that carers juggle a lot and even though I don’t know personally as I have never been a carer, I would think it’s a very demanding role. I feel even if you love the person you’re caring for, it doesn’t change the fact that it can still be very stressful.

Then again, I have never been a carer so far be it for me to pretend to genuinely understand...regardless, I admire what you do and appreciate it can’t be easy in the least.

You raised some great points about practical to-do lists and maintaining perspective. Great ideas!

Thanks again,

Pepper

[romantic_thi3f]

Hi Pepper,

Thanks for your post! What a great thread 🙂 Love the idea of incorporating more self-care into our lives. This is something that I'm constantly working on!

- Totally agree with scheduling self-care. Sometimes trying to block out 30 minutes feels too difficult for me so I'll plan just one small thing that I can do. Perhaps that's just a little bit of reading. It all counts.

Sidenote: I have an app called YouApp which is a photo based app about micro-actions. A lot of them are self care based. My action today for example is to try and have a mindful moment.

- Have a think about where your day goes. I read a quote once that stuck with me "Make a list of things that make you happy. Make a list of things you do every day. Compare the list. Adjust accordingly". It's so important. It really made me think about the things that I was filling up my day with I didn't even enjoy. Do you have to do these things? Are you doing them because you should? I actually got rid of Facebook for this reason!

- Have healthy food around the house. It's going to be easier to eat well if you have the food around!

- Try to do something each day. This doesn't really apply to the 'busy lives' part, but things like taking a shower and going for a walk are acts of self-care. Your body deserves to be loved.

- Remember the big picture. Self care is important. For so long I've believed and been taught that doing things for self-care is being lazy. I'm trying to unlearn that now. But I know that I'm not the only one who can feel guilty about being nice to yourself. We deserve to love and be loved. 🙂

[Peppermintbach]

Hi romantic_thi3f,

Thank you very much for sharing your wonderful ideas 🙂

I’ll have to look up this app that you speak of...it sounds very helpful. Thanks again.

Funny coincidence that you mentioned thinking about where your time goes each day. I have been thinking about the same thing recently so I have been trying to track how I spend my time to see how I can try to eliminate, spend less/more time on, etc. Great suggestion!

Good point about highlighting the importance of self care and how some of us struggle with a sense of guilt from it, which means we can sometimes feel conflicted about it.

Great points!

Pepper

[Peppermintbach]

Hi all,

I wanted to discuss keeping your physical space/surrounding/environment inviting and clean.

I find when the space that I am in is more pleasant and clean, it automatically lifts my mood a little.

But I also understand, sometimes cleaning and tidying can fall by the wayside if we are busy. I’m certainly guilty of this and I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one...

So here are some gentle suggestions to try to stay on top of potential messes:

• Do a small amount of cleaning and tidying most days even if it’s just 5-10 minutes each day can make a huge difference.
• If you’re in a good financial position, perhaps even consider hiring regular or irregular cleaning services. As I mentioned before, think of it as exchanging money for, in some ways, an even more valuable commodity, time. But I understand this isn’t an affordable option for everyone.
• Find ways to make the environments that you spend a lot of time in more inviting e.g. low maintenance indoor plants for your work desk, artwork on your walls, etc.

Kind thoughts to all,

Pepper

[Quercus]

Hi Pepper,

This is great idea for a thread. I hope more people contribute.

I have a few ideas to add...

• Identify your boundaries and limits. So often we give of ourselves until we are drained and burnt out. It is important to learn to recognise when it's time to say no.
• On that note... Practice saying no. Saying no doesn't have to be rude. It doesn't always feel good but sometimes it is necessary.
• Delegate when you can and ask for and accept help. Even my 4 year old can help. He makes his bed and tidies his room then helps his sister with hers.
• Accept imperfections. When my kids tidy it isn't the same kind of clean I would do. And I've had to let that go. Otherwise I will spend all my time needlessly. Accepting help means accepting others limitations.

I wonder what ideas others will come up with.

[startingnew]

HI Pepper thank you for starting this thread. so many people with hectic lives often forget that small thins can add up too.

i like all the points that are written here by everyone. im finding them pretty helpful so thank you everyone.

Pepper- i agree that a clean house helps me. i often do all my cleaning in one go but your right 5-10 minutes can be a big help in a busy schedule.

Nat- i like the points youve put here here about identifying boundaries and limits as well as accepting imperfections.

a few self care tips to add...

-- small things add up so even 5-10 minutes of doing something you like can help

--Self care doesnt have to be extravegent simple things work just as well like:

• sitting outside with a cuppa/coffee
• doing a short breathing exercise
• a small drawing sketch
• giving yourself a hand/foot massage (not everyones cup of tea but an idea)
• painting your nails

[Peppermintbach]

Hi all,

Nat: thank you so much for those wonderful suggestions 🙂

I found them all very helpful and they are also good reminders for us to not try to do “everything” and that it’s okay to ask for help (e.g. delegate as you said) or look out for our own mental and physical space (e.g. boundaries as you mentioned).

Butterfly Wings (Startingnew): Thank so much to you too!

I think some people will prefer your way of doing the cleaning in one go whereas others might be more like me and do it gradually. I suppose it just depends on what works best for each of us 🙂

Great ideas, I love painting my nails, coffee and sketching (although I haven’t been feeling particularly creative lately).

Thanks again,

Pepper xoxo