Mindfulness: What Is It? (Even if you dont know please post so we can help grow the forums accordingly)

[blondguy]

Hi Everybody

This is only the basic dictionary definition...

"Mindfulness is a state of active, open attention on the present. When you're mindful, you observe your thoughts and feelings from a distance without judging them good or bad. Instead of letting your life pass you by, mindfulness means living in the moment without judgement"

• Please be as blunt you wish....If you dont have an idea about mindfulness it would be great if you could let us know
• If mindfulness hasnt worked/or is too broad a concept for you it would great if you can let us know your thoughts too
• If mindfulness has helped you, please help others to help themselves by posting how you have embraced this mindset

It goes without saying that the forums are a judgement free zone and I really hope that everyone can jump in and have their say

Your input is highly valued no matter how you respond to this topic. There are no experts here...New Posters are Most Welcome!!

My Kindest Thoughts

Paul

[Guest_1055]

Good topic....

I am not sure if this is related but it could be. I think mindfulless is connected to our personality in a way.

The reason I say this is I pretty much always notice and observe my surroundings. For example if I am sitting on a step and see a seed pod on it, well I just naturally pick it up. I then might pull it apart and study the parts in it. Like some seeds have helicopter type bits that help themselves disperse themselves etc. I have always done stuff like this, as long as I can remember. I wasn't a huge talker when I was young, and would often just sit and look at everything around me. A bee buzzing near someone's head, an ant climbing up the stem of a sick rose bush. The one red strand of hair on someone's head.

This is normal for me. I don't try to do mindfulness at all. In fact someone on here told me I was doing it. I had never heard of it before. I never studied it or anything.

Anyway I think it is easier for some more then others. Like if you are a real talker, you might be so busy chatting you don't notice or hear that bee buzzing near your head. But I did. If you are a natural serving people sort of worker, you are so busy doing that, you don't see a green frog sitting on the rail watching your every move. But I did. Now even if I was carrying a plate of crackers and dip to serve someone, I still would see the frog sitting there. And I may even get so distracted by it, that I would sit the platter down and look at the frog breathing the way it does. All these things do make life as I know it more richer in a way. But I have to admit it also can distract me from doing chores in a timely manner.

Anyway don't be concerned if you want or have been told to practice this mindfulness and you are finding it a challenge you see I find it a challenge to not do it and to stay focused on the task at hand. I have to practice this....

[The_Abyss]

Glad it gave you a laugh Shelley! No offence taken - my reply was very "tongue in cheek"!!!

[blondguy]

Hey Shelleybelly & TA and Everybody!

I wrote this thread as I dont really have a 'grip' on mindfulness......50/50 and learning though 🙂

Dottie has her own coping mechanisms like I have....Mindfulness comes with ongoing practice and a sincere commitment to heal and find some peace.

Starwolf has a great understanding on mindfulness which I respect

• Mindfulness .....staring at the stars for ages with no other thoughts except how small we really are
• Stopping and smelling the roses.....and being lost in that moment is also a form mindfulness too

Just 2 basic examples from my understanding.......being in the moment without any intrusive thoughts...

Sara....When I mention people using a 'microscope' all I mean is that they are giving undue attention or overthinking a situation that doesnt require it. It took heaps of counseling for me to stop over analyzing as much as I used to. Its only an individuals perspective.

I just call it mindlessness....(by not using my old overthinking mentality)

my kindest

Paul xo

[Clues_Of_Blue]

Hey Paul and everybody,

This is a good topic, and certainly worth the round-table discussion it's getting. For my part, I'm a bit of a noob at mindfulness and have a lot still to learn I think, but I'm getting the hang of it. I first heard of it here on the forums, and the way it was described and recommended, I admit I thought was a bit of a fad and the definitions too broad and airy-fairy. There was an inkling that it had some grounding in clinical psychology and didn't just come from hippies though, so I was curious. Most of the resources I came up with were voluminous and horribly written, unfortunately, so I was repeatedly put off further exploration, until I came across a little app for my phone called "Mindfulness: The Art of Being Human" (there's a free version, folks).

Much as I don't generally care to advertise products, the aforementioned app had a knowledge section that really spoke to me. Short chapters, concise information, and none of that flowery language I had come to associate with mindfulness. It explains a lot about how and why the mind wanders off the way it does, the fact that a thought or action repeated often enough loses its meaning and becomes habitual. Things like overthinking, constantly checking messages/social media/etc., drinking, that sort of thing, become hardwired into the brain as an automatic response to stress and perpetuate themselves without conscious effort to stop them. Conversely, let's say I'm having a hard day at work and start to get stressed. Where I might normally start adding up the things that have gone wrong and anticipating what else will with mounting frustration, I can choose to take a deep breath and centre myself, maybe plan my day to minimise likely problems. If I notice that moment of stress at the right time, consistently choose the deep breath, etc., that is what will eventually become habit. This is neuroplasticity at work, changing the entrenched patterns of behaviour and in fact physically changing the structure of the brain. It's that no-nonsense scientific understanding that made mindfulness something I wanted to have a go at.

The other thing was, with meditation, I finally got it through my head that it isn't about clearing the mind, but about simply noticing the thoughts when they try and take over and letting them go, to come back to the meditation. That was a game changer, for me.

Blue.

[Clues_Of_Blue]

Sara, I'd particularly like to address your point about mindfulness looking a lot different from the perspectives of those with depression and those with anxiety. Mostly I see it applied to anxiety, so I'd like to weigh in on the other side. Personally, I'm just a terrible sad sack and not really anxious at all.

I agree that depression is very much a sense of feeling trapped, or burdened, which has been a massive problem for me for the better part of a decade. That tendency to slip into negative thinking and the sense that things I need to change just won't is all too easy to fall into. So here are the ways mindfulness helps me with that (Dottie, maybe these might apply better to you than the broader definitions of mindfulness you might have come across):

• Disconnecting from the feeling of sadness - name the thought ("I am sad"), identify the cause, assess whether it is even based in reality. This is the observer within Star mentioned at work, and takes the emotion out of the experience.
• Don't engage with the negative thoughts. Observe them, let them pass by.
• Most important of all for me specifically - don't fight the negative thoughts. It seems like the thing to do if you don't want them, but fighting them makes them stronger. Of all the things I have discovered through mindfulness, this has been possibly the greatest help for me.
• Don't try to escape the thoughts or feelings, i.e. through distractions or chasing pleasurable sensations. Which isn't to say focus on that thought/feeling, but acknowledge that it is there, let it sit in the background as you go about whatever you need to be doing for your general wellbeing, rather than directly trying to get away from it. Another particularly worthwhile tool for me.
• Regular meditation. I use guided meditations (from the app I mentioned in my last post) and an app called Nature Sounds (it's free) in the background while I meditate. These things give me an anchor during my meditations to remind me to come back to sounds I'm hearing, or my breathing, or focusing on sensations in my body (depending on the meditation track I choose). Doing this simply gives my mind a rest from the constant overthinking and restores my energy a bit, helping me to circumvent negative spirals of thought and stress even after I'm done.
• Mindful exercises like performing minor tasks with my off hand (i.e. brushing teeth) to bring me to the present.

Just a few ideas, hope they help for those who aren't sure how it works.

Blue.

[blondguy]

Hey Blue....Always great to see you

You have posted a realistic and easy to grasp post on mindfulness which many people will benefit from.

Firstly the app you found is a bonus and Im going to use it...

Blue's App "Mindfulness: The Art of Being Human" (there's a free version, folks)

There is a ton of really helpful info you have written Blue....I Love this;

Blue Said: "Most important of all for me specifically - don't fight the negative thoughts.
It seems like the thing to do if you don't want them, but fighting them
makes them stronger. Of all the things I have discovered through
mindfulness, this has been possibly the greatest help for me"

This really is great stuff Blue and thankyou 🙂

My Best

Paul

[Mr_Walker]

Hi Paul, and everyone,

Another great topic! And helpful replies!

I have found mindfulness the most useful way to reduce my anxiety - it helps with my two main problems - worrying about the future and worrying about things I've said or done in the past.

I was introduced to mindfulness by my psychologist and later I found an excellent description of it in a book called "What The Buddha Taught" which describes the typical mindful breathing exercises and goes on to describe how you can develop that practice to include walking, talking, going about your day in a mindful way.

Its still the best description of mindfulness meditation I've read.

(I'm not a Buddhist myself but I came across it while studying Indian history - well worth a read, it's an introduction to Buddhism for westerners written in 1959 - criticized by some Buddhists for cherry picking the parts of Buddhism that fit best with "Western" ways of thinking - but also very useful BECAUSE of that!)

Before I'd heard of mindfulness I realized (in hindsight) that playing improvised music live was the only time I was really experiencing the PRESENT.

I agree too that it's a very broad term that's used in a lot of different ways...

Thanks again, J.

[blondguy]

Hey Mr Walker

You have a really good understanding of anxiety/depression. I noticed that 'What Buddha Taught' was the best book and description of mindfulness meditation you have read. I am interested in this book. Can I get it off the internet?

You also mentioned "I agree too that it's a very broad term that's used in a lot of different ways..." Im happy that someone else found the term a broad one. I am still trying to get a handle on mindfulness J...

Blues Clues...You are not only intellectual but crystal clear and logical in your two great posts above re Mindfulness and your take on the topic. I really love your ability to phrase as well as you do...and the word 'Noob'. Thats going into my dictionary Blue and thankyou

Starwolf.....If anyone reading has the time I hope you can scroll back up this thread to Starwolfs' posts on Mindfulness. They are written in plain english without any jargon so everyone can benefit from her experience and understanding on the subject.

Thanks everybody. My kindest. Paul

[Mr_Walker]

Hi Paul, I dont know if I can put a link here but you can get a free PDF version at ahandfullofleaves.org - I found it just after I bought the Kindle version.

"What The Buddha Taught " by Walpola Sri Rahula if anyone wants to google it. Cheers, J.

(The section on mindfulness is fairly short but so clear and well written!)

[blondguy]

Hey J

No worries...I know I can put up a link on here especially as its a huge help to the many people that read the forums (70% of the hits we get choose to read only which is fine of course) and the rest of us that elect to post.

Mr Walker (J) has a link that has helped re Mindfulness for anyone that is searching for further info in a PDF format. Just click on PDF download after you copy & paste the link below into your browser

ahandfullofleaves.org

Nice1 J and thankyou for the info too!. Paul