Merry and Bright or Bah Humbug, how do you feel about the holidays?

[Summer Rose]

As the old saying goes, Christmas comes but once a year, and judging by my trip to the mall today it has well and truly arrived. Crowds of shoppers, bustling about, looking for the perfect gift. Not all of us here on the forum celebrate Christmas but I doubt than any of us can ignore it.

The advertisers tell us this is the best time of the year. A chance to enjoy the good things in life, spend time with the family and generally eat, drink and be merry. But this simply isn't the case for everyone. The holiday and its associated activities (e.g. shopping, cooking, travelling, etc) triggers stress, sadness and depression for a lot of people. I'm one of them.

Don't get me wrong, I love my husband, kids and Australian family and friends and I will no doubt enjoy the holidays. But for me, Christmas is always tinged with a hefty dose of sadness, which I carry inside and try to hide. This is because my mum, my sister and her family and all of my extended family live overseas. I've lived in Australia for some 30 years and you'd think I'd be used to this by now but I'm not.

So, I'm wondering how Christmas affects you? Are you looking forward to the holiday, feeling stressed or feeling left out because it's not something you participate in? What are your strategies for protecting your mental health this festive season?

[lilly2016]

Good morning/afternoon, well we survived Christmas, just, I had to keep going outside for some fresh air as there was alot of tension inside and I couldn't cope with that, dad got ridiculously drunk and disorderly so it was tough trying to deal with that also, but I totally understand it and don't hold it against him, no it wasn't pleasant for me but I managed to smile through on occasion. What a relief when it was all over. I hope you all got through it okay.

[Summer Rose]

Hi Lilly

Congratulations! You made it. Your spirit is stronger that anything that was put in your way. You should be really proud.

I like your strategy of going outside for fresh air. Great way to re-charge and build strength before going back in for more. I used that one myself, although in reverse.

My day was lovely overall but at one point I felt quite sad (reflecting on mum alone in hospital on the other side of the world) and my adult son noticed. He suggested we sneak out for a walk on the beach. That was our time to talk about Grandma and be with her in our hearts. It meant a lot to me, as we could support each other. When we rejoined the others, I was ready to smile again. I think my husband was the only person to notice us missing for the half hour but he understood.

Kind thoughts to all

[lilly2016]

Morning Summer Rose, happy to hear you got through Christmas. I know too well the feeling of sadness and helplessness whilst a loved one is so sick, I hope you are all okay. A walk along the beach on Christmas day sounds soothing to the soul, yes I like that. I don't know where everyone is but it's been so hot here and it's made me feel so tired and I really don't have time to feel tired as I have to clean my father's house etc. I think I've got Christmas burnout. You must be heading to Canada soon. Anyway hello to everyone! Hope you are all okay.

[Summer Rose]

Hi Lilly

Thanks for your post. It really helps me to know I'm not alone and to be gently reminded that sickness and death are unfortunately a part of life. Grief is universal and unavoidable.

The heat is dreadful where I live too. Lots of water, hats, seek shade .. I'm sure you know this already but all I can think of.

The universe has blessed me with an upgrade so I can have my leg elevated while flying and airline staff will provide wheelchair assistance. I am so grateful I can make this trip. I leave tomorrow.

Mum is in hospital but more coherent this morning so another blessing. I will be travelling for the next 48 hours and then spending majority of my time in hospital. My replies will be spotty.

I had no idea this would happen when I started this thread and I cannot bear the thought of letting you wonderful people down. I know that New Years will be tough for some people too.

I want to ask any bb admin staff reading this for advice and help. What is the most appropriate course of action now? Spotty replies or could someone step in and monitor this thread? Thank you in advance.

[lilly2016]

Thanks Summer Rosé, I hope you have a safe trip, I will be thinking of you and your mother and I'm sure everyone understands in relation to keeping up the thread, but thanks so much for all your wonderful posts and for giving us your time. U agree new year's will be just as Christmas for some people, somewhere in the forums they will find a place to talk through their concerns, fears. Hi

[Lee lee 73]

Hello Summer Rose,

I agree with Lilly2016, everyone will understand there are always other places to post here on BB. Please take care of yourself - like you have kindly advised us to.

Have a safe trip, take good care of you and hope your mother is ok.

Lee

[Sophie_M]

Hi SummerRose. It is completely fine if you need to take time away from the forums for travelling and to spend time with your mum. You have opened up an important and helpful discussion about how people feel across the holiday season, and that discussion can continue for any members of the community who need it. 

[Summer Rose]

Hi

Thanks, Sophie. I appreciate the understanding from bb management.

Thank you Lee and Lilly. I will pop back in when I can, if I can.

To all others, stay safe as we head into the New Year period. Kind thoughts to all.

[Guest2910]

Hello Summer Rose,

Just would like to 'thank you" for the thread which You started allowing Each + Everyone on the BB forum an opportunity to Express themselves openly about xmas.

Now that xmas is over, Every Day Is Special. We CAN continue the fine cheery spirit All Year Round.

Well Done for all Your hard work!

I Sincerely Grant you all the very best + safety whilst going home to see your Mom, Family + friends.

Please Remember, it's the "quality time" spent with your Mom that's important making those moments Special + Precious deep down into Your Heart. Those few precious moments can be embedded there for the rest of your life. All those beautiful happy memories Will have an positive outcome whilst dealing with your Own personal issues to Move Forward.

Take care.

Have a safe journey

With Kind Regards

BBQ

[geoff]

Hello Summer Rose, please give your mum our sincere wishes and my best for the New Year for yourself, BBQ, Lee Lee and Lilly, and let's hope 2019 is a wonderful year for all of us.

Take care.

Geoff.