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Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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pat06 Fun activities
  • replies: 3

hi everyone me and the wife have just recently split up (7 weeks) but what I would like to know is what activities do guys 35-40 do by themselves?

hi everyone me and the wife have just recently split up (7 weeks) but what I would like to know is what activities do guys 35-40 do by themselves?

Joe_L Car anxiety
  • replies: 2

I have been considering selling my car since i have an anxiety about driving. However i do have type 2 bipolar and anxiety/depression and am coming out of a bad patch. Should i wait to see how i do or am i fine to go ahead with it. I am happy to ride... View more

I have been considering selling my car since i have an anxiety about driving. However i do have type 2 bipolar and anxiety/depression and am coming out of a bad patch. Should i wait to see how i do or am i fine to go ahead with it. I am happy to ride my bike and use public transport even though I'm in a slightly small rural town. Also to add a fair amount of my anxiety is from global warming so this is a big part of it.

white knight Weightloss - the "commonsense diet"
  • replies: 13

I'm talking now after last year losing 16kg. All my life I've struggled to lose weight. I was the heaviest I'd ever been at 143kg. My sister had embarked on a gastric sleeve January 2018 and I was determined to lose some weight the cheaper method. No... View more

I'm talking now after last year losing 16kg. All my life I've struggled to lose weight. I was the heaviest I'd ever been at 143kg. My sister had embarked on a gastric sleeve January 2018 and I was determined to lose some weight the cheaper method. Now its March 2019, my sister has lost a whopping 53kg and is looking amazing. Well done to her. Not all of us however can afford that expense nor is compatible for such an operation. So, I thought long about what kind of diet I would implement. There is such a selection...which one is the best. But I'd asked that so many times and chosen one only to be disappointed. It was time for the commonsense diet. Have you read on a few threads when I use analogy of the "seesaw"? EG depression on one side, hypomania on the other- that's the bipolar seesaw and it rocks always, only when it is stationary and horizontal for a short time does "normality" present itself to our lives. Well, the same analogy I'll use for weight gain/loss. One side of the swing is hunger/boredom/genetics of a large body frame and taste....the other side is fitness, weight loss, attractiveness, feel good mentally, etc When the seesaw is horizontal, that is the best position for weight loss and dieting. This period is when we are motivated, not bored so we are occupied by distraction, the weather is good for exercise, we have ended a period of eating lots of junk food so we are burned out with that, but we cannot make the swing tilt for a long time towards fitness and attractiveness- why? Because we don't have the endurance! Endurance is like willpower and positivity but there are subtle changes between them. Endurance is long term commitment- over weight people lack that. We swing like mars bars hanging on ropes in the wind. There is not point punishing ourselves by wishing we were model figures. That is another seesaw in another playground- get over it- it aint gunna happen! So my plan was simple. End eating of the following products- pasta, potatoes and bread are the main ones. Frankfurts, items with more than 8%fat content, excess sugar, bread, juices with sugar, fizzy drinks, most flour and chocolate. Eat in moderation - wraps, popcorn lightly salted (a treat), sugar free biscuits, rice noodles (replacing pasta), fresh fruit and vegies (not much corn), gluten free cereals, bran, Eat in large quantities- water, light crispbread, light milk, eggs, salads items, white meat. Exercise- brisk walking for 15 minutes minimum. Good luck TonyWK

16sundayz Day Hospital or or Day Group
  • replies: 1

The past 6 months I've been struggling with feelings and thoughts and emotions and especially in the last month things have gotten a lot worse. Could I please have some advice and recommendations for a therapeutic community in the Western Suburbs of ... View more

The past 6 months I've been struggling with feelings and thoughts and emotions and especially in the last month things have gotten a lot worse. Could I please have some advice and recommendations for a therapeutic community in the Western Suburbs of Melbourne that's in the public system covered by medicare or is low cost as I'm unemployed. I could maybe stay overnight for respite or just go to a day hospital program for a month or a few that has activties, group and individual counselling and chill time and I'd be free to go back to my own home.

Julie3392 Decluttering - KonMari style
  • replies: 2

Hey everyone, So I think many of you have heard of Marie Kondo and her methods of decluttering, be it through Netflix, her books or just through social media articles. I have read her book, and I love how it states that decluttering isn't just simply... View more

Hey everyone, So I think many of you have heard of Marie Kondo and her methods of decluttering, be it through Netflix, her books or just through social media articles. I have read her book, and I love how it states that decluttering isn't just simply making the house neater and more presentable, but also helps bring about positive changes in our lifestyle and our mood by getting rid of what doesn't 'spark joy'. I'd just like to hear your opinions and experiences regarding her method if you have tried it, and if you encountered any difficulties or noticed significant changes in how you feel. I do disagree with some of her advice (I still prefer hanging most of my clothes haha) but those are miscellaneous. Thanks and have a great weekend!

Leah_jane Exhausted from trying to please everyone
  • replies: 1

Hi everyone. How do you stop being a people pleaser ?? I suffer from depression and anxiety and have done on and off for years. I’m constantly trying to please everyone in my life to feel needed. I’m struggling with lack of sleep big time and I’m cur... View more

Hi everyone. How do you stop being a people pleaser ?? I suffer from depression and anxiety and have done on and off for years. I’m constantly trying to please everyone in my life to feel needed. I’m struggling with lack of sleep big time and I’m currently feeling totally worthless and exhausted. I feel totally alone. I have kids and a partner, my partner is constantly busy and exhausted when he gets home. Everyone says to me take time out for you but how the hell do you do that when your the one who holds everything together?? Lately I’m struggling more and more getting more and more moody and feeling more and more upset and useless. I feel like I’m self destructing and no one sees it. I want to be totally alone but not be at the same time. I’ll send my partner a strange text just to get the attention I crave. How do do people cope with all these feelings ? Feeling lonely.

white knight Willpower- where is yours?
  • replies: 30

Bare with me here. At 17yo having joined the RAAF I was overweight, unfit and just a boy. I found running long distance very hard especially while carrying lots of weight with equipment. During long marches there was running in a troop situation. You... View more

Bare with me here. At 17yo having joined the RAAF I was overweight, unfit and just a boy. I found running long distance very hard especially while carrying lots of weight with equipment. During long marches there was running in a troop situation. You were required to maintain your location in that troop...no matter what. Eventually, feeling exhausted I'd fall drop to the back of the troop where my corporal would yell at me and threaten that if I didnt get back to the front I'd fail. Fail meant likely discharge. I'd sprint up the front and stay running there until I dropped back again. I passed the course but had my corporal not yelled in my ear I would not have ran half that far. I would have given up. Such was my lack of willpower. Obviously I had the physical ability, not the mental determination/strength to carry out my obligations. As adults with a mental disorder we are less likely to have a disciplinarian yelling over our shoulder to "get out of bed..NOW! So the easier thing to do- stay in bed. We are fragile people. We know and accept this. We dont like it, but that's the way it is. However if we acknowledge such shortcomings we are half way towards achieving a goal- to break our mental shackles and challenge ourselves beyond any limits we have ever had before. What might be required is a mentor figure that can tactfully pressure us to take the harder road. Or, for us to develop a plan to gather such strength or change of attitude to achieve the goals we need to implement to improve our daily lives. How do we do this? If doing it alone, we can attend motivation lectures, probe methods to develop positive thinking techniques, enter a new phase of self change and read up on stories of amazing courage by famous people (eg Shackleton, Mandela etc that succeeded against all odds) If you have a willing and loving partner that is tactful, you can include him/her in your plans. You wouldnt want a disciplinarian yelling at you but some firm insistance could be the prompting you need. Just refrain from getting angry at them doing what you've endorsed them to do. You greatest tool with this challenge is honesty with yourself, to recognise your need to be more motivated. Enjoy your new journey of finding your willpower...it's there hiding...but it is there. TonyWK

Skinch The unpredictability of depression
  • replies: 1

Hello, I'm new to this. I suppose that means I have got to the stage of really trying everything. V. briefly...depression for last 16 years, many different medications, stays in clinics to come off and go on new meds. At this time I am coming off an ... View more

Hello, I'm new to this. I suppose that means I have got to the stage of really trying everything. V. briefly...depression for last 16 years, many different medications, stays in clinics to come off and go on new meds. At this time I am coming off an anti-depressant that has made me gain huge amounts of weight. That alone brought me even further down. I am trying, with not much success to succeed without meds. One thing that I would like to share and know if others have this is that sometimes I wake up feeling 'ok.' Think I will do this and that, even take myself for a walk....half an hour later the depression hits like a sledge hammer, the mood goes down and totally without my control, all positive thoughts fly out the window. I try and pinpoint the thought/s that led to this and often cannot. From there the day descends into its usual negativity, the walk seems absolutely impossible, etc etc. I have tried mindfulness. Doesn't work for me. No good at keeping diaries, mood plans etc...I seem to be too pragmatic for all that. I refuse invitations, I cried all day in front of my son, I imagine him remembering this when he grows older. My husband has moved out....he has had enough of my 'negativity'. I cannot afford to see my psychiatrist at over $300 a visit. I have a lot of serious health issues besides depression and it all ends up in a vicious circle of pain and low mood. And yet sometimes, there are glimmers of hope and I even surprise myself by being pleasant to my husband or doing something with my son.....I seem to think that travel is the only thing that makes me really happy, or having a trip to look forward to. With my financial problems this is an impossibility. Isn't depression complicated? Thanks for listening...

Doolhof Discussing Anti Depressant Medications
  • replies: 45

Hi Everyone, Firstly I would like to suggest that you have a read of "Discussing Medication" in the box at the top of the page on this site. We are not allowed to mention the name of medications here but we can discuss the medications in general. I a... View more

Hi Everyone, Firstly I would like to suggest that you have a read of "Discussing Medication" in the box at the top of the page on this site. We are not allowed to mention the name of medications here but we can discuss the medications in general. I am certainly not a medical professional at all, so don't take my word as being correct for all people all the time. This is a place to share your concerns, thoughts and feelings towards anti depressant medications. I'd like to start of my suggesting: - Always talk to your Dr or person who is indicating anti depressants are advisable -Ask the chemist for an information sheet relating to the medication. Don't be concerned by all the side effects that are listed, you may experience none of them! They are listed as a requirement I presume. -If you have any concerns ask the Dr or the chemist - Some medications may take a while to be effective. Discuss this with your Dr - What works for one person may not work the same for you, it could be more effective or less helpful. -Don't stop taking your medication without the Drs advice - Try to take the medication at the same time each day or as required. - Some people do not believe that medication is required, if your Dr has suggested it, I would follow their advice - Medication is just one step to assisting yourself, exercise, a healthy diet, water, sleep and doing pleasant things each day helps as well. This thread is open for anyone to make a comment or to share. Some of you may be knew to the experience of taking anti depressants and may have all kinds of questions. Once again I am certainly not an expert so what I have written are just suggestions. Cheers to you all from Dools

RebeccaL Need some advice, tips, tricks to staying well.
  • replies: 2

Ive recently had surgery on my ankle a couple of days ago, and i am now not allowed to walk on it. i am on non-weight bearing instructions from my surgeon. My question is, i suffer from a bit of depression that is usually well maintained by the fact ... View more

Ive recently had surgery on my ankle a couple of days ago, and i am now not allowed to walk on it. i am on non-weight bearing instructions from my surgeon. My question is, i suffer from a bit of depression that is usually well maintained by the fact that i keep my self very busy, but now that i do not have much to do, i am finding myself in my head a lot more. I am feeling very useless and alone. I've never had many friends in the past but it hasnt bothered me up until yesterday when no one messaged to ask how i was doing. I am unable to make meals for myself and my family do not really help unless its just for dinner. I am getting around ok on crutches but need to keep my foot up. Any advice on what to do or how to cope over the next two to three weeks while in bed and unable to do much? I find that i need to keep busy to keep my mind off over thinking. Any advice would be appreciated. Usually i love having time off but feeling like i am a pain in the bum and useless and alone is pretty awful.