Constant anxiety about wanted to come out

[Guest_23018231]

I've known that i wasnt straight since i started high school, and i got back into contact with someone i went to primary school with who by that time had come out as pansexual. I was with my best friend for most of our high school life close to 4 and a half years and then we mutually decided to go our separate ways as we wanted to different things it was hard for me bc i did truly love her. My family knew she was my best friend and i used to frequent her house 3 to 4 times a week often staying for dinner. They do not know that at that time i thought she was the love of my life.

Now i have the constant stress of hiding this part of myself from my family and my co workers which is inhibiting my work abilities as i just want them to know who i am but i dont know how to start that conversation with them.

[Croix]

Dear New Member~

I'd like to give you a warm welcome here to the Support Forum. A good choice to come here you can look around and see how other people have handled coming out. It is only natural not to want to have to pretend to be somebody you are not after all.

I'm sure I do not have to tell you that is is a very worrying thing, and one can be fearful between being accepted or rejected. It is also not a once-only action, but may have to be repeated as time goes on in differing circumstances.

Another technique is 'inviting in' where one invites a person one believes is suitable to become closer to you by seeing the real you. This is not necessarily a proposal, just wanting to be seen as you are by someone you like or admire or trust.

I guess preparation for how to handle things going either right or wrong might be a good idea.

No method is risk free, do you think either or both of your parents might be understanding and supportive? It may be one place ot start.

I'd suggest you contact QLIFE, which has phone and web-chat 3pm to midnight every day. It is manned by sensible peple and has a lot of information on site as well as a chance to talk with others of your age about their experiences..

I think, via the counceling service there are also a set of templates for starting conversations, however I'm not 100% sure it was Qlife, if not they may know more.

I hope all goes well

Croix