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New guy friend buying me expensive things

Community Member

I have a new guy friend of 2 months and he has been super helpful to me like interview preparation, but just recently he took me shopping and spend $400 on clothing and buys all my dinner when we eat out and now says he will buy me makeup . He says I already looks nice but the things he buys will make me look like a model he says.

my friends and mum thinks he obviously like me because he is doing all this, but thinks he will expect more now, like a relationship since I accepted the clothes as a gift,..like he said it is his gift for me for travelling to Sydney with him... although he spent $400

what are your thoughts about him paying for me?

9 Replies 9

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi SweetAngel,

Thanks for your post and your question.

There's a part of me that thinks that because you're here, you already think that it might not be healthy or a good idea that he's buying you expensive things. I think if you were totally okay with it and thought it was fine, you probably wouldn't be asking this question?

To try and answer though, I'm not really sure, because I don't know what his financial situation is. It's a lot of money to me, but is it a lot of money to him?

I do agree with your friends and your mum that he probably likes you, as when I think of guy friends I can't think of anyone that I know who would do this for a friend. But ultimately to get your answer I think you need to ask him. Have you ever asked or had that conversation about why he's buying you so many nice things?


over dinner last night he admitted he like me . But the issue is that he is 11 years older than me

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi SweetAngel,

From a man's perspective, he is buying these things as a romantic gesture. And yes, he is most likely anticipating an intimate physical relationship.

Please don't lead him on, clarify your intent with him.


Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hi SweetAngel, thanks for your comment, but please just be careful of why he is doing this, it's lovely for him to do something like this, but it's for a reason.

Best wishes.


Sweet angel

Thanks for your post.

The things I picked up in your first post is the fact he bought you clothes and wants to buy you make up that makes you look like a model.

Did he choose the clothes for you or make most of the decisions about the clothes. Were they clothes you would have chosen for your self ?

I am not sure how old you are . Is the 11 years a big issue for you or your family.?


Hi quirky,

i chose the clothes myself and tried it on, then he said he’ll buy them for me as a gift.


What do you think and what do you want to do?

How do you feel about the 11years age difference?

I am thinking you have some doubts which is maybe why you wrote the post in the first place.



i don’t really mind the 11 year difference as my mums partner was 13 years older than her,

i only have doubts cause my mum is worried he wants more than friendship, like an intimate relationship which we know is true because he said he likes me last night and is evident with him buying me gifts.

im only concerned because I’m basically his only close friend, and just because I talk to him, he wants more and thinks I’m interested in that way. Makes me think why his past friendships haven’t last long.

Hello SweetAngel

Can I suggest first you need to ask yourself -

  1. do I like him just as a friend? (no romantic feelings) or
  2. do I like him as a potential boy friend? (romantic feelings or might develop romantic feelings)

Then you need to tell him clearly where he stands, especially if it is the 1st one.