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I feel alone.

Community Member
Im feeling down most of the time. My mom is overbearing and tries to control me with my decisions even if im in my 30s. If she gives advice, you have to follow it or else she gives you cold shoulder. I want to live on my own but at the same time i feel i cant especially right now when families need to be together. At work, im good at what i do.. im not perfect but i know im reliable.. but people don’t appreciate what i do.. i feel some people dont think highly of me because my job is only admin. Sometimes when they talk to you it’s as if you are stupid. My friends always tease me... i can take teasing but i feel like im the only being teased or made fun of... all of these experiences make me lose hope and hate myself for not being a good person. I don’t think highly of myself and don’t believe in myself.
1 Reply 1

Community Member

Hello Ijustwanttobeaccepted,

Parents (as one myself) learn to give direction to their children and provide judgement of their behaviors and outcome as part of raising them, as the children get older the habit of direction and judgement can stick around more than it is needed.

Business works on metrics and measurables' that determine profits, those metrics don't always quantify the quality of the worker, the effort and time put in, their reliability, etc.

Measuring yourself by their standards is not always going to be a true result.

Your friends may cajole and jibe, it is a thing that friends do. If you are concerned you are the target more often you could take notes, use a notepad or app to tally a conversation, or just have a conversation with one or all of them about the tone of conversation to lift it by being supportive.

You are more than a sum of your work, your mothers decisions or friends opinions.

Perhaps you could jot a list of things you do, decisions you have made with successful outcomes. You are in your 30s' and that requires some degree of success in life if you are able to hold a job, pay bills, etc. This can be a starting point to confirming you are a good person.

My list for today starts with 'Got my pants on'