Feeling a little lost.

[Hana-1]

I’m not sure where to start since this is my first time ever opening up about how I’ve been feeling… Life’s been a little difficult lately, I’ve been caring for my ill mother since I was a teenager (didn’t finish my education or receive job training because of it) and recently she’s become a bit harder to deal with… I also have a grandparent with dementia that needs support as well because my uncle & aunt abandoned him and I’ve been the only family member taking care of them. I haven’t seen my older sibling #1 in a decade since they left the family and older sibling #2 is unstable and drug addicted. My extended family are across the country because my mother moved us away 15 years ago for a DV relationship that fizzled out so they don’t really make an effort to get to know me because of past disagreements with my mother…. We’ve been wanting to move back home to reunite with family but can’t afford it. I'm living off fortnightly payments and after paying medical expenses, transport, utilities & food, we barely get by. I’m just really stressed about what I’m going to do after my mother and grandfather pass away? I’ll have no one, no source of income & no roof over my head… I won’t even be able to pay for anyone’s funeral. There’s literally no one I can turn to for support… I struggle to even make a doctors appointment for myself. I feel so hopeless.

[Guest_9866]

Sorry to see no replies yet. How are you feeling today. Did you feel better telling your story. I care for my dad without any family help too. And he is getting harder and harder. Two suggestions for you from my experience or knowledge, 1. TAFE and Universities can be flexibible with learning but you have ro supply the evidence for justification. Ask admin or counsellor. They can extend learning duration so you can cope easier. 2. With my dad, I set up what I nickname a death tax lol but essentially $40 from his welfare goes into an account that unable to be touched and is high interest. It has built up over several years with end goal that it will have enough there for his funeral expenses. In his Will documents it is documented that this account solely for this purpose and "if" remainder then that may be shared as per other liquid wishes. Taken several years but he has five grand which will assist. Goal is ten grand min and locked.

[tranzcrybe]

Hi Hana,
You have undertaken a great deal in caring for two elderly relatives with little or no support from family.
There are options though to help your loved ones and give yourself the time you need and deserve to find your own life - friendships, career/training/education, etc.
I would start with their GP to find out what services are available in your/their situation. An assessment of their capacity to manage daily tasks might start the ball rolling for you.

Look after yourself first in order to act in their best interests.