Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Feeling a bit lost in life

Community Member

Hi out there, I have a good life but over the last few years, my life has changed a lot. My father passed away a few years ago which changed the dynamics a lot in my family, then a close younger family member passed away and that was so sad and unreal. I help my elderly mother a lot, who although is quite independent, it takes its toll some days.

I have also changed my work situation where I used to work every day in a fairly stressful office environment to now changing my career potentially in another direction. I am married to a supportive person, although I do a lot for them, I have no issues with money, I have a good family and friends but I am feeling lost most days of my life. It feels there has been too many changes that I don't like and I am not coping at times.

I went on anti-depressants which did not agree with me and I am now off them and wont be taking medication again.

I guess I'm just wondering if there is anyone else out there who may be feeling like I do. I am just over the age of 50 and so it could be to do with life changes with your body, but just find it hard sometimes to feel motivated and cry a lot.

Any ideas or just a reply back would be great just to see if there are others out there who are feeling like me, I am grateful for what I have in my life, a lot more than others so I am very fortunate, but just feel flat a lot of the time.

I do a lot of volunteering and as much as I enjoy it, sometimes it takes its toll as I am helping others, and I think sometimes I need to help myself more. I am always wanting to help and that is where my passion is, but then I can get drained too.

I also get very affected by news stories and I find it can affect me deeply for days, whereas I think some people just get on with it more and life goes on a lot easier for them.

Thanking anyone in advance who replies to me!

5 Replies 5

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hello Sue

Thanks for sharing

You have had a number of big changes that would make most of use feel somewhat overwhelmed.

Sometimes recent changes can bring up old feeling of thing in the past we have not really come to terms with yet.

Through my own experience I sought to find a way I could help myself as I'm not a fan of anti depressants but that's just me, on my search I looked into NLP and hypnosis even to the point of studying to be a practitioner and found that timeline therapy really helped me out, having someone guide me through my past experiences that had negative emotion meant I could make some huge changes.

Just for the record, I'm not a practitioner in hypnosis or nlp but the investment in the training was well worth it.

If you'd like to know more just respond to my post.

Community Member

Hi Sue!

I am having a bit of a lost day myself, and it was good to read your post. I relate to a lot of what you write about. I too have gone from working in a very complicated, often-overwhelming, full-time job to being practically unemployed (due to a retrenchment). At first i kept busy, but havent been able to find much work, and as time has gone on, have felt more and more bewlidered and lost. I have elderly parents too, and have trouble with motivation and confidence. It's hard. I dont have much advice for how to get out of it ... I have been seeing a psychologist for a year now, and I find it him very helpful: just to have someone to tell everything to, who doesnt judge me. I was on anti depressants too ... but i got a puppy and stopped taking them. Having a dog has helped, but things remain difficult. I dont feel valuable or useful anymore, and I dont know how to connect back into the world so that I am.

Even though I dont have any advice really, I do want to thank you for posting, and I really wish you well. Its reassuring to know its not just me! Best wishes. I'm hoping good things around the corner for both of us.

hugs pawsy

Community Member
Thanks Pawsy!! I have 4 pets which keep me very busy, sometimes frustrating as well as they are very spoilt and demanding! But I wouldn't be without them, as I am a big animal lover. Thanks for your reply, I do really appreciate that there others who feel this way as I do believe it is quite normal when life changes and it is good to know others are out there who can relate as well. Good luck and please keep in touch and let me know how you are doing 🙂

Community Member
Hey thanks for your reply. I do appreciate it and thanks for your advice, will keep in mind. I really just wanted to write a few words down and see if others were feeling a bit the same way and I know I'm not alone which makes me feel more supported. Thanks again and best wishes to you for replying to me 🙂

Community Champion
Community Champion


welcome to the forum. As you can see by your replies that this is a caring/friendly/supportive community.

Many people cna relate to what you wrote. About ten years ago I was feeling lost , trying to leave a chaotic relationship, coping with hot flushes. I volunteer too but you must as you say look after yourself.

Do you a have a hobby or an interest that you like doing.? Sometimes I feel we need to go through a stage while we work out what we will do next. maybe not lost but on a journey without a compass.

thanks again for sharing your story. There maybe othe threads on the forum that may interest you as well.