To all my BB friends and supporters out there. I would like to apologize for my mind set over the last few months. Because of the rift that has been happening with in my family. Plus coupled in there with that being put into an old age home. Getting no visitors, not being able to get out because of mobility issues. Trapped in a building with no peers to interact with. Surrounded by people who have various stages of dementia, me with most of my facilities. People in here meaning well posing various questions meaning I have to repeat myself or put it out again in a different way. Sometimes having to tell people off line the same stories over and over .Meaning I am getting nowhere. Cannot get out because My legs not working, staff thinking I have dementia, no visitors, family not responding to messages or cutting me off when I call. All that is doing wonders for my depression, anxiety, if I didn’t have it before I really do now. I have not closed the door between me and my siblings. I have put the invite out to them I made the move quietly. Now it’s in their side of the caught they have to now make the effort. I cannot do all the work it’s a team effort. They no longer seem to know their own brother. If they don’t know me now they never will. If they don’t at least converse with me.
So to my BB friends Sorry. forgive me please if possible go a bit easy on me a bit as things are still a bit raw and painful I am working on my family I wont give upon them I have worked on them for over 60 years I wont give up just yet.
Sometimes we need to "reset". Stop for a little while, think about our mindset, then restart. You just did that above. Great, well done mate.
Changes come and go all our lives but your situation is a little like "the one who flew over the cookoos nest". It would have been tough for anyone to get through that.
So, its a new year now and I hope you look forward to 2018.
Yes the situation outside with the home and your family can rub anyone raw, and it's not surprising some of that might leak though into your posts at times.
I know you said the well-meaning keep asking and you have to keep repeating, which is a further reminder of your situation. Could I turn that around and say, it is because you are cared for and people like having you around that they do ask.
Many have just the one thread for the serious stuff and updates on their situations. Could you perhaps simply point out in the Cafe or wherever you are asked that they are talking about the more serious stuff and then direct them to your thread?
Like Tony I wish you a very much better 2018 and hope your family starts to see sense.
It takes courage and caring to say 'Sorry'. It means you value us as your peers and fellow sufferers as we value you and your input.
I totally understand the need to 'reset' as Tony says; I've done it many, many times. Croix's idea of having your own thread makes sense too. It could be a place to vent, ask for help when needed, or just to write about what's happening in your day.
I do hope your family warms to you reaching out as you have. It'd be nice to reset those ties too yeah? Sending a hug your way to lighten the load.
All my best..
What really hurts is back in December my Daughter graduated High school. Friends of mine went to the graduation, other adults we know went. Where was I, stuck here not even an invite not a word nor a video nothing.
Is that my lot in life to be shunned by my family no one has even told me what I have done to deserve being abandoned like this. Well they can rebuild I am still here. Willing to listen if they can talk. If they choose They can rot in Hades. Their choice I refuse stress over it.
To have an ungrateful unloving family is a terrible thing, and all of us here would wish better for you. Sadly all we can really do is suggest you try to put that all to one side (no I know it is just about impossible) as you have a fertile imagination, a rich sense of humor and many other valuable mental qualities.
Harnessing these to give you some respite and distraction is in some situations all anyone can do. That plus sharing your sense of fun, care and experience here on the Forum to those that need it.
I know this is not a solution, and will not make the hurt go away entirely, but it might be a bit of a help - what do you think?
That thread took a lot of guts to write and kudos to you too. You have been a part of many threads and been there for many people in pain too.
You know very well that you are not alone. I missed my daughters primary (not secondary) school graduation as I was given the 'wrong' date by my ex. I turned up to an empty school hall...I cried my eyes out
Feeling your pain Peter
My Kindest as always for you
Kanga I am new here but was posting in the NY thread and could see you had a lot going on. Even with all that though your sense of humour and support for others showed through even to this new poster.
I hope your reflection on yourself is helpful for you going through this coming year.
Arte thanks for your post its appreciated. Some of my posts be it for others or not It's me usually steering the words to make a point and have a laugh so you remember what was said. Sometimes it there to give a heads up swallow the pride a bit more ask for help. It does not get easier to say help, or sorry. You just learn to make those dam Butterflies to fly in formation. I am still coming to grips with it all. What I really need BB cannot give me except to touch base with others and occupy my mind till I can get what I really need. A face to talk to. Like the add said " It wont happen over night but it will happen"
Kanga ( painted blue) oh my whatsit a blue Kanga never seen one of those before