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All alone all the time

Community Member
I struggle with friendships and just relationships in general. I never feel that I can trust people and I am constantly paranoid and afraid that they will abandon me, so I'm terrified of making a single mistake or opening up to people. Recently, a person who hurt me incredibly deeply for a number of years has come back into my life and infiltrated almost every network of relationships that I had. The problem is that I was told by my psychologist that I need to open up to people to help set boundaries because this person never listens or acknowledges when I'm upset by their actions. But I'm horrifically non confrontational and the idea of this is nauseating to me. I feel all alone, I feel suffocated and trapped but at the same time I feel so far away from everyone I care about. I feel like I need to leave and find new friends, but it feels like I'm running away from my problems. I just wish that I could trust the people around me to put me first, to care about me, to support me and look out for me, but I can't and I don't, I don't think they would stand by me.
1 Reply 1

Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hi pobaw,

Welcome to the forums, although I’m sorry to hear of the circumstances surrounding why you’re here! In this instance, I don’t think you necessarily need to confront this person but I do think you need to get on the front foot with your friends before this person can get to them enough. You basically need to open up to them and explain what this person did to you. If they are truly your friends, they will have your back and if not, then you know where you stand. I think that is the only chance of nipping this situation in the bud. Because it would be a shame to have to abandon your friends and let this person win without even giving your friends the opportunity to be there for you. Does this sound like something you could do?