The day I lost my soul

[Guest_7403]

6 years ago today an event occurred that changed my life forever.

I went to work, and 18hours later when I finally walked out of that place I was never the same again.

Looking about at the person I was before it, and who I am today....I can only describe it as losing my soul, the guy I used to be ceased to exist.

I've lost so much, my home, my life, my drive and any sense of happiness or enjoyment in the short journey of life.

I'm resigned to the fact that I'm never coming back, no treatment, medication or self will can ever remove this pain I live with daily.

Everyone I know tells me that they believe in me, they believe I'm still inside and they believe that I can overcome this.

But they're wrong, the person I used to be could of overcome those things, im not that person anymore.

No one seems to understand, it's like my mind and soul left my body that day...but my body kept living.

There's no better life in the future, just more days of pain and suffering. I didn't ask for this to happen to me, im not a religious person but I find myself asking god did I do something in another life to deserve this punishment.

For someone whose job was to lock evil up to protect the innocent, I am now a prisoner inside my own mind. Yet, there is no key for this door and no one can hear me screaming to be let out.

I look forward to the day I see that light shine through the darkness and im finally at peace

I'm not at risk, it's just a very hard day for me.

[Petal22]

Seek to share your path with those who recognise and appreciate your gifts, who you are

[Guest_7403]

I've always been scientifically minded.....but there's a part of me that believes in fate/soul mates.....it might be the empath in me.

Any ways a few years ago I went interstate for a weekend away with a mate and met this stunningly beautiful girl at a club....hit it off....instant chemistry.....went back to her house and had the only random one night stand of my life.....it was just the perfect night.....and its one of the only true happy memories I have to this day.

When I'm super low I still think about her and how it was just a flawless experience.....for both.

So got rejected earlier in the evening on a dating app.....and was feeling pretty low in myself

So I sit down to watch TV ....and there's that beautiful girl playing sports.

I googled her and yep definitely her.

It really did cheer me up, not only did it bring back such lovely memories but to see her representing...truly amazing.

For me, it's fate that I seen that in that moment of lowness.

It reminds of who I was back then and who I can be again

[Petal22]

Hi Guest 7403,

I am so happy to hear you say that! How wonderful Guest 7403………. hold onto that” hold onto everything about it”! YES you can be that person again definitely! ! It s all within us Guest 7403……. Every thing we have ever wanted is in us! We hold the power within us to be whoever we want to be…….. we just need to go out with in intent and be that person every day…………. It’s within us……. Take back your power Guest 7403…….. the best is yet to come…

I believe in fate too, I believe every thing happens for a reason…… we may not know at the time what it’s here to show us at the time but in du course it will be revealed……..

For what happened in your low moment and it lifted you…. I believe it’s fate …… just amazing……. Always believe in miracles because they happen every day….. never loose HOPE!

Rise up my friend 😊

[therising]

Hi Guest_7403

While Albert Einstein rejected a lot of religious beliefs, he did believe in a kind of spiritual nature in life, expressing 'Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind'. To be scientifically minded whilst recognising the soulful nature of life, is what it means to encompass all possibilities whilst questioning the source of all things.

How incredible, seeing that woman on television. I can imagine you were incredibly shocked when you saw her. I find sometimes it is the truly shocking moments, the incredible synchronicities, which wake us up to who we truly are. There can be so many subtle synchronicities, so subtle that we miss them, so thank goodness for the shocking ones which give us a heartfelt jolt. Can remember some years ago, having one of the worst nights of my life. In preparing for bed whilst sobbing almost uncontrollably, I recall having said out loud 'I can't do this anymore. If you're there, send me an angel'. I'm not a religious gal by the way, more into a general form of spirituality. I put my head on the pillow before reaching over to turn on the radio. The song that played was 'In the arms of the angels'. The timing was truly incredible. I believe, at times, we are meant to be shocked back to life, when feeling there is no life left in us.

I'm so sorry to hear of the woman who let you down. Incredibly disappointing. Perhaps she showed up in your life to remind you of how much you still wish to love. Perhaps she appeared in your life to prepare you for the woman to come. I hope she comes soon. With you being somewhat of an empath, I hope you feel her nature clearly, without question.

🙂

[Petal22]

Hi Guest 7403,

How are you? Just checking in on you 😊

[Guest_7403]

Nothing changes.....each day seems worse than the previous.

[Petal22]

Oh Guest 7403,

Sorry to hear that…….. I’m here to chat to you……. Is there anything you wanted to talk about?

[Guest_7403]

Long, tough few days. Saying goodbye to the past....thought it would be a new beginning.....but sit here and wonder where to from here....

Life is painful...I don't want to be like this anymore

[Petal22]

Hi Guest 7403,

Lovely to hear from you 😊

Sorry to hear you have had some long tough days…..

Well done Guest 7403, saying goodbye to the past is a huge step for you…. Im proud of you..

I understand life can be painful but the painful bits you are letting go of are part of your healing…. We have to feel them in order to release them…

Your new beginning is starting by letting go of the past….. focus on what you want in life and who you want to be and go out with intent every day of being that person and obtaining it.

The best is yet to come for you…… work towards a positive future for yourself…

Sometimes healing comes in waves.

Some days, you will drown.

While on other days you will float.

Some days you will fight to breathe .

While other days you’ll feel like you can do anything .

Be patient with your self .

You’ll get there .

Keep going 💪

Im always here to chat to you Guest 7403 about anything anytime..

Do something nice for yourself, catch up with a mate….. 😊

[jtjt_4862]

Heya Guest_7403,

I'm proud of you for saying goodbye to the past. From here, your life is yours to control, and you are the captain of the ship. It might feel intimidating as you're unsure where to steer your ship towards to, but from a different point of view, there are endless possibilities that you can steer your ship to, each with it's own sets of challenges (pain and suffering) and rewards (joy and happiness). It'll be an experience that will help you slowly let go of your past.

Jt