Seeking long term support - I'm a mother whose firstborn was coercively taken for adoption 30+ years ago. Severe PTSD, MDD, complicated grief & more.

[LaurieD]

Hello

I've hesitated to post in these forums as loss to adoption is often a volatile topic, but I write in hopes of meeting other mothers and fathers too who have lost to adoption against their will. I am blessed with wonderful help now but what I'd highly value is to meet others like me in here for ongoing interaction, especially when I'm running rough. Like right now. I'm suspicious this time of year (Nov) has an anniversary date in it but I can't recall what that could be.

I know the richness of trusted friends who walk beside each other, sharing their experiences and what gives them strength and hope can be the most helpful sometimes. Knowing the diagnoses etc is helpful, but living with it every day is the challenge and cannot be done alone. This environment allows for focus upon difficulties which perhaps my friends & family are somewhat jaded by after over 30 years, especially since they don't know what it's like to live with (thank goodness!).

Is there anyone in here who also walks this life-long journey with whom I could join in support for each other?

Thank you for your time :).

Kind regards

Laurie

[PhoebeWings]

Hi Laurie,

I read your most recent post a little while ago, and have pondered and thought over your words....I feel for your distress, your struggles...I really do...this painful grief is mine and that of too many other women.

I didn’t reply straight away.....there’s so much to unpack and sift through, when we approach matters of faith, isn’t there...?
Especially as we all have our own perspective....

« esp when world & church says healing is possible now. No, it's not! Not yet »

It’s very sad when certain Christians demand that complete healing is essential now...and we’re talking about the dissolving of deep, deep grief and psychological burdens that come with the unnatural experience that women like you and I share.
As if it didn’t exist and we hadn’t experienced this unnatural crime against our very female being.

I liked how you said ‘ Living is a team effort, we do our part and He does His.’

It’s true that productive ‘management’ of our hurt selves is absolutely possible through faith and sound spiritual health, but it’s an ongoing struggle for wellbeing, it’s not a fait accompli.
We’ll have periods, short or long in intensity, where the painful affects of our lived experience overcome us, Psychologically, emotionally and spiritually - but hopefully with faith, and the comfort we find, we hold on, re-set and find some equilibrium.

Ancient scriptural texts promise and point to a full reconciliation and full restoration ‘ look, I’m making all things new’ ....

If ever you have time or are inclined, look up Doctor Robin Parry...Parry is not heading a break away church or cult ( 😉) he is just one of many Christians past and present through the ages, who understand that God will be victorious in ALL things...and ALL of His creation can be drawn back into His love and will...although for some, the journey will be a battle in that they resist, but still He will pursue...until..one day...all will be all in God.’..that is the full hope of faith for those who seek ultimate divine goodness and victory in all things...Universal Salvation and Reconcilation.

Parry is just an example, there are many, many others..I just happen to like his delivery.

Thank you dear Laurie for allowing some space on your thread to speak respectfully of these things, to other readers I’d hope nothing I have said is inappropriate for this forum 🙂 - respecting that we all have different perspectives.

I hope you are finding some peace Laurie....and everyone else here.

Take care dear.