Ptsd or not ptsd

[Asenna]

Hi there, I’ve a few threads going on but mostly under depression.....

But Im here to clarify whether my symptoms are ptsd or simply major depression with anxiety.

2012, things were okay in life if a little stressful. I had issues with my gallbladder and finally decided to have it taken out. Was a little anxious as normal, like who likes surgery even if it’s elective. Had my gallbladder removed, was only supposed to be overnight. To cut a long story short the surgeon found something that he thought wasn’t right. I asked if it was cancer and he said maybe. I felt sad and wanting to be with my family but stayed another night. After more tests he said it was highly likely it was cancer. My world fell apart. I felt so scared and anxious. I didnt want to have cancer nor die from it. I was beside myself. I felt highly anxious as I couldn’t get it out of my mind. I was also depressed because it involved the liver. Highly likely went to 99% sure. I seeked reassurance from lots of people to put my mind at ease and I found it so hard to function. Seeked a second opinion and was told it was very unlikely it was canver. It was something but he wasn’t sure. The uncertainty continued but the anxiety has subsided a bit. Still quite emotional. Had an ercp and found it was just a dislodged stone stuck there. All clear. My worry has completely gone. Mind you the word cancer sent shivers up my spine but I simply moved on with life. Move to 2014, and I wanted to have my prostate checked as I had inconsistent wee. The worry returned but it wasn’t debilitating one bit. It was just worry. Had another check up but the day I was waiting for the results I couldn’t keep my mind away from the thoughts. I was quite anxious and stressed. The results came through and I was ok. It was nothing tablets couldn’t settle. Two weeks after that I started to feel my anxiety begin to re emerge. I was feeling weird and worried about little ailments. Before you know it I was in full blown anxiety and overly emotional. The anxiety was the killer. I couldn’t sit still. The adrenaline was overpowering. The sadness was intense. I didn’t feel safe on my own. I didn’t suffer from flashbacks. I didn’t suffer from any nightmares. It was full blown anxiety. It felt like a nervous breakdown but my psych said it was trauma. I didn’t get it. He said it will come good in a number of weeks. Nup!! I was gone. I wasn’t convinced it was that. A year after this happened I lost my marriage and family.

Fab

[PamelaR]

Hi Asenna
Life over the past 6 years sounds quite difficult with all your health worries and then to lose your marriage and family. My heart goes out to you Asenna. To experience anxiety and depression after operations or health scares is normal. You're not alone.

I'm no health professional Asenna, and unable tell if what you are experiencing is related to trauma or not. You could always get an opinion from another doctor or psychologist I guess. The forums are a good way of getting peer support. Feel free to browse this forum and join the discussions, particularly the threads -

• PTSD for Medical and First Responders
• Complex PTSD - What is it and how do we cope

My anxiety is triggered by PTSD, e.g. Something happens, e.g. a loud bang, or a smell, or see something (e.g. checked shirt). Within a day or two my body goes into hypervigilance (i.e. safety concerns, who was around, were the doors locked, blinds closed etc), all my senses on high alert. From there my anxiety heighten significantly - pounding heart, perspiring, sleeplessness, moody, irritable, frightened, irrational thoughts. Anxiety continues for weeks, then I'd become depressed from lack of sleep, using up all my happy hormones etc. Depression continues for months.

So how to isolate the trauma / PTSD component in all this? For me it comes from the trigger and my body and mind's response.
In the initial stages of my diagnoses the psychologist used Trauma-focused cognitive behavioural therapy.
This showed how my thinking affected my mood. It taught me to think in a different way about life, perceived dangers, and stress. It challenged my thinking patterns, reframed the way I thought, helped to face stressors and learn ways to challenge them.

The idea of thinking about my thinking patterns and reframing is to change the pathways that that developed during the trauma. To close down these old pathways and to build new ones so my body no longer responds in the same way. I’ve pretty much done that with my childhood assault.

My childhood upbringing is harder because of all the different memories that I’ve had to trawl through and change the pathways. It’s taken a long time to do this and continues.

Good evidence shows trauma-focused CBT is effective in reducing PTSD symptoms. CBT is sometimes used together with ‘exposure therapy’ (or ‘behaviour therapy’) where we are exposed to fearful objects or situations over time.

Hope some of this helps Asenna. Keep reaching out, if and when you want.