Hollow soul

[Hollow83]

hi..

im reaching out because I’ve never met another ptsd or bpd sufferer

ive been managing to put a band aid over the hole in my soul caused by being sexually abused by my brother for my whole childhood for the last 25 years or so and recently my world exploded and nothing helps anymore

weed, pills, food, alcohol, sex, pain I used it all to plug that hole that I imagine we all have.
five weeks a go I lost my job as a zookeeper and with it I lost my identity my friends my income and my reason to get up in the morning

im doing everything I’m supposed to I’m seeing my gp once a week a psych once a week and a psychiatrist once a month I’m on so many pills but nothings working I find myself daydreaming about just drifting away

i just need to know it can get better. Please if there are any others out there like me tell me it can get better because I’m losing hope

[Aaronsis]

Good Morning Hollow83

I just wanted to stop in and say how very very brave you are and how happy I am that you have reached out for support and to have discussions on this forum, there are so many wonderful people here to chat to and offer support and comfort to you.

I am so so sad and sorry to read your story and that you have lived with the trauma of being sexually abused by your brother. I have no idea how that feels or how you manage to cope with that and I was so pleased to read that you are in fact doing all the right things for your journey to healing and for choosing to find happiness and peace for you, well done that is awesome.

It must feel so very desperate and out of control for you at the moment with the loss of your job which as I hear you say, brought friends and income and mostly your identity, this must so very painful for you and I am so sorry.

I am so proud of you for reaching out and for talking here, there will be some great advice coming your way so keep coming back here to check and to chat. I hear what you are saying about just daydreaming of drifting away, I can hear how the thought of that brings you comfort, however if you are really struggling, please give lifeline a call 13 11 14 as they have some amazing people that can help you right now.

Sending you hugs and support at this time and hope to chat to you again soon

AS

[CKS]

Dear Hollow83

YES things can get better. We are sorry you are feeling this way and it is great you are obtaining the support of professionals. Give it time... let yourself be vulnerable to their advice and suggestions.

with love

CKS