Complex trauma/complex PTSD

[rarepixy]

Hi I dont even know where to begin.

So is anyone about that has been diagnosed with complex ptsd from childhood abuse around? I find very minimal support groups with hours upon hours or searching.

I suffer many health problems due to this mental health problem ill call it.

Just looking for others to talk to as no one understand that our brains are literarily wired differently from others. Medical fact btw.

anyone feel free to comment

[Guest_4643]

hello rarepixy, welcome. i like your username.

i have PTSD, but not from things in my childhood. just wanted to reply since i deal with that. take care. i'm sorry if my reply isn't satisfactory enough but i do care. i'm here if you need someone.

[rarepixy]

Hey thanks for your reply 🙂

I also have ptsd from adult events thanks for your lovely response

And likewise if you need someone I'm here to. I'm a good listener

[Truetomyself]

I have complex PTSD from childhood trauma. It is hard to find groups and people to talk to. The only person I have to talk to is my psychiatrist. It's hard but if you need someone to talk to I am here. My family don't understand so I pretty much am alone.

[Guest_4643]

thank you, same to you

[rarepixy]

Hey, yeah my family don't get it either. Its hard for anyone to understand. it sucks really. Has it taken a toll on your health? I'm at the point where i am so sick from other health issues and all my specialists and doctors think its all linked to trauma because not only have a suffered childhood trauma but also abuse from relationships ect

[Truetomyself]

Hi rarepixy,

I have multiple mental illness. I found when I was working a lot and not looking after myself. My anxiety made me really unwell because I would stress a lot. It did and still takes energy from my body, that I get sick and tire easily. Which again is not understood by family. I am not a GP or specialist but it could all be linked. My nightmares wake me so I don't get complete rest and lack of sleep can have an impact on health. I hope that helps. 😊

[DizzyLisa]

Hi - I've just been diagnosed with complex trauma/ptsd linked to childhood abuse. it is very hard to find help I agree. A friend gave me the book "what happened to you?" by Graham Perry & Oprah. ITs new but has really helped me to understand my brain and I'm not alone.

[The_sleepless_man]

Hi rarepixy.

I agree that there does not seem to be a lot of support around for C-PTSD, it is even harder for people to truly understand. I have gone most of my life living with what I was put through as a child, constantly thinking it was my fault. I sought help a few years ago for my depression in relation to relationship troubles, I thought that's what bought it on, we went through the motions and saw a counsellor together and individually, we worked hard and got back on track, well, I pretended to be on track, I was on medication for 12 months but due to my job, if I had of stayed on them I would of been let go medically so I pretended to be fine and got off them, fast forward to late last year and we were in the same spot, I sought help for myself, back on medication and saw a counsellor, that was when we got talking about my past and what I went through, my counsellor and my psychiatrist both agreed that C-PTSD was the underlying cause of my depression and anxiety, I am went back on anti-depressants however they were not working so we have switched my medication up which starts Friday, I also take medication to assist with my sleep however that only seems to work 25% of the time, on a good night I get maybe 6 hours total, waking 2 or 3 times, a bad night maybe 3 at most with multiple times awake, I have also been prescribed a sleeping pill to take for those particular bad nights, however it has been stressed to me to not rely upon these.

It has been hard talking to my wife about what I went through, she had a good upbringing in a loving family, so its hard for her to understand, but she is trying, the hardest part is actually trying to explain what I went through. I have been working on this with my counsellor, some days we only talk about my past, some days we don't touch on it at all, he is very good at reading me and knowing when he can talk about it or not.

I am constantly highly anxious, always on alert, I hate crowds or anywhere there are lots of people, I don't make friends easy because of this too, it leaves me so tired and on edge always, I snap t my kids which makes me feel even more worthless as a dad, some days it really is so hard for me to do anything at all and I just want it all to end, if it wasn't for my wife and kids....

This time I am not rushing to come off any medication and if that means I get let go from my job so be it.

Just know that there are people here for you, reach out any time you want.

Regards, The sleepless man

[Fiatlux]

Hi, I am new to this forum.

I suffer from C-PTSD from horrible childhood abuse and is compounded by even more horrific abuse and violence in my very long marriage. I am still trying to get out of it now.

I doubt my abusers ever felt an ounce of guilt for the pain and suffering they have caused me.

Most of the time I appear normal. But when the ptsd is triggered, I loose control and I am a mess for a while.

Being called crazy is probably the worst misconception.

I had counselling years ago, before I had my own children to try to deal with the childhood abuse and trauma.

I was and am, a pretty damn good mother. I gave my children a loving stable life, all the while hiding and shielding them from the abuse I received from their father. Except for one occasion when my children were primary school age, my eldest then 8, ran into our bedroom to witness his father physically assault me.

I will never ever forget my son, crying, please daddy, no. He came between us and my husband stopped.

My two youngest children were downstairs huddled together in an armchair.

I went downstairs later, acting like nothing had happened.

My children had no idea what violence was. I never ever had raised my voice with them, let alone laid my hands on them.

I have since discussed that incident with them as they are adults in their 20’s now.

It was most distressing that my son confided that their father would abuse them when I wasn’t home and he made them promise to never tell me. He would take them out shopping for toys after to ensure that they stayed quiet.

Every time I had to work weekends and he would be home with them, I came home to them playing with new toys. So it happened frequently.

Husband knew that I forbid physical abuse and never touched the children when I was home. He wouldn’t even verbally discipline. So I was horrified when my children finally told me.

I still don’t know the full extent of the abuse, but there were no bruises.