No matter what background we’re coming from, we are all aware of the fact that any sort of emotional or mental abuse can leave long-term effects on the mental and emotional health. Research has also proven that if this trauma is experienced during childhood, it leads to even more severe consequences. Often children believe that they are the problem. The cause. So, they internalize this and are impacted for the duration of their life.
It is very common, as I’m sure many of you can testify, when the other person convinces you that everything is your fault, no matter what happens. Children grow up with the burden of this enormous weight inside them.
According to psychologists, it is completely normal to disassociate after such emotional abuse, and it later leads to anxiety disorders.
Children with at least one parent who is emotionally abusive are especially prone to anxiety. These people are actually high-functioning, and good manipulators. When caught in bad behavior, they can skillfully find a way to talk themselves out of trouble, and turn the entire situation around. My mother has been a perfect example of this.
This endless cycle of abuse confuses the victims, especially children, as they feel that things are not right, but cannot find a solution as they are not equipped in such a young age to respond appropriately.
It is a very common thing to believe our abusers are actually nice people for long. After all, we love them. They are our parents or siblings or relatives and other trusted significant others.
We know now that verbal abuse can cause significant psychological problems in later years including anxiety, depression, anger-hostility, and dissociation.
Early childhood sexual abuse, physical abuse, and even witnessing domestic violence, have been shown to cause abnormal physical changes in the brain of children, with lasting effects, that predisposes the child to develop psychological disorders.
Therefore, if you have been abused in any way in your childhood, remember that it is NOT your fault. You need to be patient with yourself, and you will eventually become a stronger person, as time will recover the damage. But this in itself is not enough. You need to talk about it. Share your story. Seek support. BeyondBlue and other organizations offer Counselling, advice, advocacy and referral services. Please don’t be afraid to reach out for your own sake.
