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When buttons get pushed

Speak Your Truth
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
Can anyone help ? My buttons have been pushed to the point of bringing on severe anxiety. Does anyone think this is curable ? I am desperate to feel relaxed and at peace again and to be able to enjoy my life. I don’t know how to cope
286 Replies 286

Hi SYT 🌞

Well done for getting your email off to them. How do you feel about it all this morning?

It will be interesting to see how they respond.

Were they wanting to stay at your house?

I hope you feel a bit of a load is off your shoulders at least.

Anything nice planned for you and your four legged pal today?

🌻birdy

Hi Birdy. How is your weekend going for you so far ? You had a good cry yesterday, did that relieve some of your recent pent up emotions ?

I’m β€œjust ok” today. I went out this morning to meet a small group of people locally and it was very nice and I’m glad I went, but it was an effort to get out of bed, as usual, and I came home very tired. That’s no problem really, except that I don’t feel motivated to clean up the kitchen, do some washing (that’s as usual too) etc.

I feel fine about the email. I had to answer it, or felt I did anyway, so now I have. No reply yet, but I wasn’t expecting a quick one. I have no idea what may come, if anything. Now that I’ve sent it I’m past worrying - I guess that’s good.

I had coffee when I was out but now I think I need tea - I’ll make one for you too Birdy. Enjoy.

bye πŸ‘‹ 😊

Speak Your Truth
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

I’m having a bad day. I didn’t want to get out of bed, again, this morning but eventually I did. There seemed nothing to get up for. I ate some breakfast but only because my body needs me to eat.

I know other things I need to do to help myself, going for a walk would help I know, but I have zero motivation to get dressed to go out and have very low energy for it anyway. My kitchen is a mess, I need to do washing ...

Its so incredibly hard living alone and I feel so lost and empty - my thoughts are overwhelmingly about needing company, a cuddle, support, loving and being loved. I feel like I’m drowning in it

on this forum I am so grateful to Birdy77 for her support - thank you so, so much Birdy - but I don’t understand why I don’t hear from others much. It’s like where I live I have one person who supports me to the best of h ability, but it’s not enough as my need is huge. Other people know my situation but ... nothing.

Hello SYT,

Im really sorry I haven't spoken to you for a while..

I read your last post and cried, for you, for me and other people who are so lonely that they are struggling with there self worth,

Speak your truth, I can agree, that it is incredibly hard to live alone...It's an overwhelming feeling of nothingness, emptiness, it's like your soul is slowly withering away..

SYT..A cuddle I would really so much love...Those warm, caring, hugs that makes you feel like you are someone, I need a hug so bad. My heart is breaking for you SYT..it's a huge plant, millions of people yet.... I am alone, you are alone, this is a sadness loneliness that need not...should not be felt by us or anyone..

I am sorry SYT.....you are important to me...I want to know you and your story..maybe we can help each other...

I would love to send you the biggest, warmest, loving hug to you..Please, close your eyes and imagine you are being hugged by someone that cares..

Big squishy πŸ€— hugs..

Grandy.

Thank you so much for your lovely post Grandy and please don’t feel bad - you’ve been having it tough for a long time I know, and now you have a heavy cold or virus. You really do need to go to your GP. I hope you have been before this weekend. Have you had the flu shot ? Pleeeease look after yourself and get better Grandy. πŸ˜˜πŸ€—

Yes the world is a big place and full of lonely people, in the western world especially. In Australia there is a lot that’s contradictory and hard to understand. All the stories in the media about how communities pull together magnificently when there’s a cyclone or a fire, and yet we here on this forum, and other places of course, know painfully well how people with PTSD/anxiety/depression are avoided or ignored as if we have some highly contagious deadly disease. Someone on this forum said in the last few days they had cancer and now no support, but got flowers when they had babies. SO hard to understand, SO painful, SO sad.

I said to Birdy recently β€œLike many other people on B.B. your posts are so positive, helpful, supportive, constructive it’s hard to understand that you are dealing with anxiety/depression too,” and I think the same of you too Grandy when I’ve read some of your posts to other people.

Written words can be so misleading can’t they. The same with how people look - there are some out there who look really well, healthy and like they are happy with their lives, yet inside they are broken and falling to bits.

If you look at my last post to Birdy on 2 May and read the para starting β€œSo I’ve been doing the thinking... β€œ that will tell you a bit about me.

Since my growing up years ... we’ll a lot has happened, good and bad, but mixed in and around it all has been the search for love, emotional security and comfort, a feeling of belonging, all that sort of thing, but never found what I really need. Then this year a minor situation in the general scheme of things happened and it hit me really hard. And here I am now trying to manage depression and anxiety with even less love, emotional security and comfort, and a feeling of belonging than I had before. I feel flattened - it’s just about wiped me out Grandy. Emotionally I’m one step forward and one or two back all the time. I don’t seem to be able to get back on my feet. I really don’t know how I’ll keep going like this

Thank you for being here and listening Grandy, and for your wonderful hugs. I’m sending love ❀️ and big warm squishy hugs πŸ€— πŸ€—πŸ€—πŸ€— back to you.

Hello SYT 🌞🍁 (Hi Grandy 😊)

I put a leaf because it's a beautiful autumn day here today.

i am sorry to hear you had a bad day yesterday SYT ... I felt like rubbish yesterday too. I cranked up my music and cleaned the windows, which seemed to pull me out of the doldrums a bit. Then I sat in the sun on a picnic blanket in my backyard and read a few chapters of my book. I lit a fire in the afternoon (we have one of those outdoor fireplace things) and drank wine watching the flames and ate spaghetti under the stars. So it ended up a good day.

It was great to hear that you went out socialising on Saturday morning, that sounds like it went well?

Any progress with the potential friend you made a while back (you said one of them fizzled and one could be a keeper).

You said to Grandy that you feel like it's one step forward, two steps back at the moment. That's ok SYT. At least you are going one step forwards. I feel a bit the same at the moment ... I feel really stuck like I'm in quicksand ... I have these things I need/want to do and get done, but I keep holding myself back , it is so frustrating. Motivation is very difficult when one is depressed.

So today I am challenging myself to get two jobs from my list at least started. I will report back to you!

What about you SYT? What's on your agenda for today?

🌻birdy

Hi Birdy. Thanks for your post, it’s good to read how you manage. Good on you. I wish I could do half as well. Does having a partner help you? Or does that have its own challenges?

For me it’s a hard to explain day. I overslept by a long way this morning, and it’s grey and gloomy outside. I feel sick and numb and empty and I can’t do anything. There’s more, but ... I’m so sick of feeling like I do. I feel like I’ll just be repeating myself

Birdy77
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hey SYT 🌞🍁

Well I haven't achieved either of the tasks I set myself for today.

And I ended up a blubbering mess over something that happened, that if I was perfectly well I'd just take in my stride. Sigh .....

I did achieve a walk at the beach though, and it felt lovely walking through the water in bare feet.

When I write if my day yesterday, I was trying to be upbeat about what I had deemed originally to be a write-off of a day. It ended up being ok, but I hope I didn't sound smug ... half the time when I write about what I've done, it's more about talking myself into seeing things positively than anything else.

Yes I think having my partner definitely helps me... I have to kick her up the backside sometimes too!! But we do support each other and i'd be lost without her.

i am going to try get something worthwhile done before the sun sets ... in fact i may beanke to squeeze in one of the jobs I mentioned ....

How are you feeling this afternoon?

🌻birdy

Thanks Birdy. How lucky are you ! I’d love to be able to have a cry and walk in the water on the beach. I’d also love to be able to light a fire in the garden and watch the flames, drank wine and eat spaghetti under the stars with your partner. Lovely things for you to do. If you do the 3 things to be grateful for exercise I’m sure they all must be on the list.

I’ve been looking online at a technique called β€˜tapping’ (EFT) for anxiety and depression. Apparently it has amazing results. Basically it’s about tapping on the Chinese acupressure points

I’ve a busy day tomorrow - not sure if that’s good or not. I’ll be stuffed tomorrow night

bye bye Birdy

Oops ! I meant to say β€œI’d also love to be able to ........ eat spaghetti under the stars with MY partner”

Sometimes I think I’d just love to have a partner - the right one of course, not just any partner.