Feeling desperate to make this stop

[Lilly99]

Hi there, this is my first post which is really scary. Anyway I am not good feeling really depressed and anxious . I have tried everything psychiatrists, psychologists. Mental health nurses. Medication , I even spent 4 weeks in mental hospital to have tms which obviously didn’t work . Anyway feeling like life isn’t worth living . I feel like I have had enough of this battle called life . No matter what I try nothing works . I couldn’t be more of a joke and a waste of space really what’s the point I am never going it get better . Do people ever truly get better?

[HelpfulP]

Hi Lilly99, well we all go through some rough patches, mine I was living overseas at the time feeling really lost cold and broke, but like that say it too shall pass, but you need to know by just being here you are needed and wanted, You have intrinsic value and bring something special to the world just by being here. This might be a bit hard to understand but the thoughts you are having aren't really your thoughts most people feel similar from time to time, so you aren't really alone. Sometimes we need to be reminded of what we have rather than want we haven't so I give gratitude every day for what I have and just let go of the things I don't. I hope that helps. Chin Up...

[Lilly99]

Hi , thank you for your reply , but I never think of what I don’t have . I just need this pain to stop . Selfish I know because I have a family but I can’t keep going feeling like this , I used to think I will get better some day but the reality is it’s never going to happen . I need to be at peace

[Jojo100]

Hi Lilly99

Welcome to the BB forums and for reaching out here. I am sorry to hear about your struggles with depression and anxiety. I just want to give you hope that people do recover and get better.

I have bipolar type I and was in and out of hospital on a regular basis until they found medications that suited me and kept me stable. I have experienced extreme depression and severe anxiety so know how distressing that can be.

Another thing that has kept me well is having a really good GP who understands my illness and who can refer me to mental health services if required.

I don’t know what age group you are in but people up to age 25 have access to Headspace which is a really good service (just google it). This is an Australia wide service.

Hope this is of some help and remember you are truly not alone. There is help out there you just need to find what suits your needs.

Take care of yourself

Jojo

[Lilly99]

Thank you for your reply Jojo. I have had help by my gp and a lot of other people . I think I have just had enough. This has been going on for years . I just can’t take it anymore . I am sick of feeling sad and anxious every day , I really can’t make it through another day feeling like this .

[Jojo100]

Hi Lilly99

I hear your pain and desperation, please don’t give up on yourself. There were times when the only thing that kept me here was my little dog. That’s her in the picture. She literally saved my life. You mentioned you have a family they need you more than you know.

Please continue to reach out and talk to someone today such as BB phone line or life line on 13 11 14 or the Samaritans on 1800 198 313. There is help out there don’t give up or be alone with all this. You are worth it.

Take care

Jojo

[newlife19]

Lilly99, you’ve been here before.

its agonising. It absolutely completely sucks. It is the biggest burden.

nobody would wish it on their worst enemy.

it robs you of everything, you’re right.

But- hold on.

just for tonight, tonight is not the night and tomorrow is not the day.

its far too cold for your family to be outside running place to place dealing with police and making funeral arrangements.

let them stay warm for the next few days...

can you please do that?

[Lilly99]

Thank you for your reply. It’s just hard to calm down and think rationally at the moment when I feel this bad . All I want is my mind to be at peace . Sorry I know everyone on this site feels the same . I feel selfish talking about myself . I really am a waste of space . I detest this person I have become so much . I have lost myself and become this pathetic self absorbed needy person . So embarrassing

[newlife19]

Absolutely not.

im here right now with you feeling the same way...

[Lilly99]

Sorry I know you are struggling as well or you wouldn’t be on this site. I am so selfish .

I just don’t think I can make it through tonight . I don’t want to make it through tonight . Tomorrow will just be the same . The sun coming up to a day I don’t want to face , I wish you well with your struggles and hope you can overcome them .