I can't find the right place for me to post

[Moonstruck]

I don't know any more where to put a new thread if I make one, or which ones to join in. I always used Anxiety because that is my major condition but that has been relatively under control lately - I feel Depressed today - but I don't qualify for the topics there either. I'm depressed mainly because there doesn't seem a place for me. I love some of the threads and personal thoughts for example in Staying Well, but I can't join in there, because I don't have any tips for Staying Well.

I tend to have almost paranoid thoughts through over-thinking "problems" that I would like to talk over but don't know where to talk them over before they reach the paranoid stage...I want to avoid that. I join in the Social threads saying light hearted jokey things because thats the only place I seem to belong.

I dwell on any problems my adult sons have in various aspects of their life and want to "fix things for them" - our relationship is very loving and close though - they are wonderful to me - so there is no real "problem" with my relationship with them....so I don't seem to belong in the "relationships, family" section either do I?

I worry about them all the time - when I tried to express this on forum I think it was misconstrued that I had "empty nest syndrome" - trying to adapt to my sons' leaving home....No, that's not it...they've been gone for years and years...I am a grandmother.

I liked the Getting to Know You, or is it Me? thread very much - but have been given suggestions how to start my own thread and what section to use etc and get the feeling I'm being steered away from there too.

So I am still confused. I don't feel particularly anxious today, so this shouldn't even be in Anxiety! Do you see my dilemma?

In fact the more I write the more I feel like crying - I don't know where to go next.

[Moonstruck]

Hi Pepper......at first I thought your new avatar was a clutch of turtle's eggs on the beach. I seem to have forgotten what your previous one was? Isn't that awful of me? Can you remind me?

The week before I went away to see family..I may have mentioned getting support and a sense of comfort from an unexpected source....an unplanned meeting with an "old friend".. Yes it was an ex of mine...who has been frequenting usual places hoping to run into me...this day he did.

My spirits were lifted during the rest of that day....and I posted that I was unsure the comfort had come from the right source.or did it matter where the comfort came from?? I had been so very low that just the touch of someone's hand....any person at all....was a comfort to me. I needed a human touch.

Well tomorrow I am pretty sure I know where he will be again...hoping we will meet. I am tempted to drop by again...but unsure whether to go down that direction again? I don't really want to get back with him in a full on relationship like before..i think I am just lonely and feeling so down and sad again I am clutching at straws in a way...sort of anything to get me through the weekend.....someone to talk to.

I don't really want him back again...nor do I "love" him.......I am just lonely. Any thoughts....oh wise women friends of mine??

[Guest_3712]

Humans need the touch of other humans - that is a fact I'm sure I've read it somewhere. Anyway , who's it hurting if you meet up for a little human company. Is it hurting anyone ? Any other exes or such that it may effect ?
Go for it I say . You are one hot grandmamma, we love having you here showing off in your boot and leggings, but we cant give you everything you crave.

You said he lifted your spirits, Yay ! that sounds good, besides these days you don't have to be serious about someone to 'hook up' do you ? Not sure. I haven't been out in the singles world for a hundred years, so maybe don't listen to me.

To sum up , If it feels good, makes you happy and doesn't hurt anyone then why the hell not ! Don't overthink it

And make sure, and this is very important -

You must report back to us and let us know how it goes - just keep it clean ,

Stressless

[CMF]

Hey Moon,

nope, nothing wrong with that at all. When I go to my local cafe I hope I bump into certain regulars on certain days. I don't want or expect anything from them but it lifts my spirits just talking to them. I enjoy the company as I am often a little lonley too.

i say if it makes you feel good then go for it! I wish I could bump into you.

cmf x

[Moonstruck]

Stressless Ok if you insist. This is me reporting back....and CMF yes I saw you sitting just over from us, ready to jump in and rescue me if need be....thank you.

Yes I did go - no problems. Went smoothly, no uncomfortableness and did kill a couple of hours. I did feel somewhat better afterwards and don't regret meeting up.

He didn't put any pressure on me - I did want the chance to clarify just why I had walked away from the relationship..which I was never sure he really understood, so I got to explain so there was no misunderstanding. I hate misunderstandings and confusion in these cases.

We can't get back to exactly what was before. but then I don't want to. We have no plans, just taking it easy...in the meantime it was nice to hear how gorgeous I was looking...even if it wasn't true. What woman doesn't like to hear that...especially when her spirits have been so low. Today went Ok...that's as far ahead as I am looking. thanks for your wonderfully wise advice....I am very bad at relationships...but aren't we all, sometimes? Hoping your evening is going OK and you're both not feeling too bad tonight.....my dear dear friends....luv u xo

[CMF]

Glad it went well Moon and your spirits have been lifted. If you are both on the same page then there is nothing wrong with catching up, the company will do you good. I wish I had someone could bump into and just chat too, no strings...

[Guest_3712]

Hey Moon,

So glad you had a pleasant time - see that wasn't so hard was it ?

We all seem to have this problem with accepting compliments though don't we?

Im sure you did look gorgeous , my friend so next time make sure you smile and say thank you 😊

Stressless

[Moonstruck]

Yes Stressless....rest assured I aways smile and say thank you if someone pays a compliment. don't have any trouble accepting compliments at all...I believe some people do, I wonder why.

I might go for a walk along the beachfront later....need to breathe in that clear salty air. Might plant some flowers in hanging baskets too...wishing you all a nice weekend...hope it's not too cold where you are. I'm in Qld remember....we don't do "cold" in my area...wish we did sometimes for a bit of a change.

I'd like to bump into you too CMF - feel we know each other already in a way...

[Peppermintbach]

Hi Moon,

Your comment about how the seashells look like turtle eggs made me smile 🙂 I thought they looked like pebbles so turtle eggs is definitely better lol.

I hope you enjoy your beachfront walk...hope the sand, breeze and salty air is healing. Did you say flowers??? I LOVE flowers...I find they really help lift my mood. The worse I feel, the more bouquets I keep in my room lol.

Kind thoughts,

Pepper xo

[Peppermintbach]

Hi again,

Oh right...just realised that I forgot to answer your question. My old avatar was just the default...I didn't have an image up prior to the sideways seashell heart photo 🙂

Turtle hugs,

Pepper xx

[Moonstruck]

Dear Friends

I am OK I guess. I went under the Full Moon tonight...cold and clear and standing out starkly in the black sky. I made an attempt to "let go" of my grief. Not let go of the love....but the grief. That's OK isn't it? It doesn't mean you're letting the love for what or who you've lost go.....but I have to let go, or at least strive to live with....the feeling of loss and grief. Otherwise I may as well die too.
Seeing my ex proved a positive thing..so far..fingers crossed. As I said, nothing else planned or promised. He is as careful as I am I believe, in just letting things be for the moment. I feel better inside myself, knowing I am not entirely alone and we are relating on a friendly levelIt has made me "feel better" even when not actually with him...just knowing there are no bitter nasty things unsaid between us or anything. No arguments or feeling uncomfortable. And God knows ...I did need to "feel better" no matter how, where, or with whom...as you know I was pretty bad there and still have sad days when things trigger me. The tiniest thing can trigger it....I called someone else's similar pet by mine's name the other day......and have to keep diverting my eyes when they fall on his photograph....If it rains, I worry about him out there, wondering if he has shelter. But I have to face facts that he is probably dead now....wishing everyone a significant night...and peace, wherever you can find it. xo