I can't find the right place for me to post

Moonstruck · ‎25-03-2017

I don't know any more where to put a new thread if I make one, or which ones to join in. I always used Anxiety because that is my major condition but that has been relatively under control lately - I feel Depressed today - but I don't qualify for the topics there either. I'm depressed mainly because there doesn't seem a place for me. I love some of the threads and personal thoughts for example in Staying Well, but I can't join in there, because I don't have any tips for Staying Well.

I tend to have almost paranoid thoughts through over-thinking "problems" that I would like to talk over but don't know where to talk them over before they reach the paranoid stage...I want to avoid that. I join in the Social threads saying light hearted jokey things because thats the only place I seem to belong.

I dwell on any problems my adult sons have in various aspects of their life and want to "fix things for them" - our relationship is very loving and close though - they are wonderful to me - so there is no real "problem" with my relationship with them....so I don't seem to belong in the "relationships, family" section either do I?

I worry about them all the time - when I tried to express this on forum I think it was misconstrued that I had "empty nest syndrome" - trying to adapt to my sons' leaving home....No, that's not it...they've been gone for years and years...I am a grandmother.

I liked the Getting to Know You, or is it Me? thread very much - but have been given suggestions how to start my own thread and what section to use etc and get the feeling I'm being steered away from there too.

So I am still confused. I don't feel particularly anxious today, so this shouldn't even be in Anxiety! Do you see my dilemma?

In fact the more I write the more I feel like crying - I don't know where to go next.

Guest_3712 · ‎27-07-2017

Hey Moon

you have a great time with the grandkids - as for your son he sounds wonderful just like his mother .

cheers and hugs

Talk next week

Stressless

Peppermintbach · ‎28-07-2017

Hi Moon,

I hope you enjoy and feel lifted by quality time with loved ones. Take good care of yourself.

Kind thoughts,

Pepper

CMF · ‎28-07-2017

Hi Moon,

Well I think i have missed you but hope you have a lovely trip. I agree with SL 'as for your son he sounds wonderful just like his mother'. Only a beautiful mother such as yourself could raise a man with such wonderful qualities. I think he's pretty lucky to have a groover like you for a mum too, skinny jeans, black boots and all 😉

Love ya x

CMF · ‎31-07-2017

Hey Moon,

i hope you had a nice break spending time with your family.

the friendship circle has relocated. SL has started a thread under the 'staying well' section called 'Join our circle of friendship and support.'

there is a spot wIting for you Moon.

Cmf x

Moonstruck · ‎01-08-2017

Hi CMF....thanks for telling me. I will look for it there...Certainly I will be joining you all. I do feel better after being away for a few days, even though I was very tired when I got home late last night....unpacking, not wanting to lose the newer, cleaner, feeling that being somewhere other than my place which had started to feel SO claustrophobic....being with my son and family and just different scenery, no one who knew me, eating out, different foods etc...was a welcome break.

I think it was very healing for me actually....when I know I have been sunk in this cesspool of self pity and depression. I must remind myself there is a bright, clean, "other" world out there, that is not all "awful".

I feel I must take part in that world to which I belong, whether I like it or not...we are all stuck here in this common human existence..I think I have been shutting myself away - both literally, and figuratively and emotionally cutting off from others.

Yes the time away was precious....the grand kids are lovely and innocent, laughing, not taking life too seriously...why oh why do we adults have to lose that ability? the weather helped too...being PeRFECT - sunny, not too cold, just refreshingly clear and crisp....that's Queensland folks....at least in this part.

I look forward to catching up with how you all have been.....take care...love you all.....Grandma Moon. (aaargh)

(yes I wore my boots and skinny leggings.....I know you are green with envy...ha ha)

CMF · ‎01-08-2017

Hi Moon,

Glad to hear you enjoyed your break and seem to have a slightly different view on things. We have had nice weather in melbourne the last few days, gives me a glimmer of hope that spring is on it's way. Things have been pretty much the same here but our dear Kanga is having a rough time and Sara also. Stressless started a new friendship circle thread as i mentioned and it has just taken off, it's beautiful.

So nice to see you Moon and i do hope you're feeling refreshed and relaxed.

cmf x

Guest_3712 · ‎01-08-2017

Hey Moon,

replied to you on the circle thread too, so just wanted to say great you are back and yes I am jealous of you wearing skinny leggings and boots, but just a warning there were some serious food fights going on the circle last night- totally unprovoked I might add ,but those of us unable to pull off the gorgeous , modern, grandma that you are ,might, just might feel a little threatened by you.

Totally just hypothetical you understand, but just thought I d warn you !

Great to have you back

Stressless

Moonstruck · ‎02-08-2017

Food fights in the circle Stressless? Should I wear old clothes perhaps? I am sure you can wear boots and leggings too if you want. I envisage you as quite gorgeous. if it's colder where you are, you probably get the chance more often than me, up here in sunny Queensland where we get about 10 minutes of winter to wear classy gear.

I am retaining my "feeling better" place, by some miracle...God knows how, or how long it will last. Just watch some interfering busybody here in my hometown come and ruin it for me..ringing me, emailing me, texting me, just leave me alone for a while....don't touch my "feeling better" moment....they don't come along for me too often! Let me enjoy it while I can.

the night before I came home I had the strangest dream...or fleeting moments in the dream..it was so very real. A really close long time friend of mine died almost 2 years ago. For ages after, I used to "talk to her". No I wasn't grief stricken or going insane or anything. I could almost imagine her there, hear her voice, ask her advice about stuff and hear her reply. that's ok isn't it? It was nice. It made me feel close to her.

Well, in this dream I was so surprised to see her sitting there along with some other people we knew. I sat down beside her, saying "What are YOU doing here? How can you be here?". (somehow I knew I couldn't physically touch her, so didn't even try and reach out or hug her...I just knew...that wouldn't be possible.

"I came to see you of course Moonstruck - you needed me, so here I am"...then she smiled and chuckling said "Pretty good hey?" as if she'd performed some magic trick. Perhaps she had...who can tell? It was very real.

CMF · ‎02-08-2017

Oh goodness Mon you've given me goosebumps.

how beautiful. You hold onto that 'dream' , that visit, it means something, absolutely. You grab this 'feeling better' moment and you run with it, don't let anyone stop you.

what a great post Moon, thank you for sharing it, my heart feels happy for you.

cmf x

Peppermintbach · ‎03-08-2017

Hi Moon,

I'm happy to hear that time with the grandkids lifted your tired spirit. I agree we can learn a lot from children and their sense of fun, curiosity and adventure.

That dream or magic trick- call it what you will- is precious. I agree with CMF, cherish it. Hold it in your heart. I visited the friendship circle and am extending my hand to you during this rough time...

Hugs,

Pepper xo