Feeling desperate to make this stop

[Lilly99]

Hi there, this is my first post which is really scary. Anyway I am not good feeling really depressed and anxious . I have tried everything psychiatrists, psychologists. Mental health nurses. Medication , I even spent 4 weeks in mental hospital to have tms which obviously didn’t work . Anyway feeling like life isn’t worth living . I feel like I have had enough of this battle called life . No matter what I try nothing works . I couldn’t be more of a joke and a waste of space really what’s the point I am never going it get better . Do people ever truly get better?

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

Just dropping off some mince & potatoes I made earlier. It’s not fancy, but is tasty and was one of my favourites when I was growing up in Scotland 😋

Thinking of you xox

With love & a warm hug

Your forever friend Jojo 🌻

[Lilly99]

Dear Jojo

Thankyou so much for the mince and potatoes . It was delicious and you are right . Very tasty .

Hope you had a lovely day

your friend Lilly 🌺

[Saree_p]

Hi Lilly,

Hope you are feeling better, but understand if not - thoughts are with you!

Jojo, is it mince on potatoes, or mine with potato in it? Curiosity killed the cat I know. Does sound yummy. I am more curious as I love a Mexican mince I used to make with the kids, and sometimes we had it on spud.

Lilly, what is your favourite meal?

Mine used to be pirogues and poluskis - can't really have them anymore lol.

We stand beside you Lilly,

Saree

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

Popping in to say hello and that I am thinking of you today. I took my best friend to the movies today as she is going through a rough patch. (An older friend of hers is terminally ill and doesn’t have long to live).

We went to see Rocketman which is the Elton John story. It was really good. I didn’t know he had quite a sad childhood. The music was very good.

I know you said you can’t focus for very long, but do you have a favourite movie? Can be from years ago.

Take good care of yourself xox

With love your forever friend Jojo 🌻

[Lilly99]

Dear Jojo ,

I am sorry to hear your friends friend is so sick . That must be so hard for her.

I am glad you liked the movie . It’s hard for kids that are gay . People don’t accept them . Even there families.

I cant think of a favourite movie . Well not at the moment . Sorry

your friend Lilly 🌺

[Lilly99]

Dear Jojo ,

Can I ask you a few questions ? You don’t have to answer because I don’t answer any

When you were at your worst . How did you get the help you needed ? When you went into hospital who sent you there ? Was it at your doctors request? How long have you been well? Sorry for all the questions. I am looking for hope atm. I feel like I can’t keep going . Very overwhelmed .

Your friend Lilly 🌺

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

I am happy to answer your questions.

When I was at my worst I asked for help. I went to the Emergency Department and spoke to the psych triage nurse. From there I voluntarily went into hospital. This happened several times.

Another time I went to a GP and was manic/psychotic. I was talking gibberish about needing a new brain lol! The GP organised an ambulance to take me to hospital, but again it was voluntarily. That is the only time a GP has arranged my hospital admission, however, it was the right decision for my own safety.

I have never felt forced into hospital and each admission has always helped me.

I have been stable & well for almost 6 years now which I attribute to medication that suits me and help from community mental health services, including a good GP and counselling by a very compassionate psychologist.

Hope this is of help to you xox

With love your forever friend Jojo 🌻

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

How are things today? If you have any more questions don’t hesitate to ask. Hope what I shared was of some help.

I just remembered about another time I was really struggling when I was still attending the psychiatrist at mental health services.

We were able to handle that episode as an outpatient because it turned out my mood stabiliser level was too high. So I was followed up regularly by the psychiatrist and my case manager over about a month until I stabilised again.

Just wanted to let you know it is also possible to be treated as an outpatient although I did have a lot of support to do this.

Take care xox

With love your forever friend Jojo 🌻

[Lilly99]

Dear Jojo,

Sorry things aren’t good atm. It’s relentless.Couldn’t be Worse. Really hard making it through the night.

Thankyou for answering my questions . Don’t ever feel like you have too though . Sorry for asking them .

Good luck with the CAT team and the g.p Saree.

Hope you both have a good day.

Lilly🌺🌸

[Jojo100]

Dear Lilly

I am sorry things are not good for you atm. I wish there was something I could do to make you feel better.

Don’t apologise for asking questions because if I don’t feel comfortable answering them I would say so.

Try and do something nice for yourself if you can such as retail therapy or treat yourself to coffee or lunch. Just something out of your normal routine.

Take good care of yourself xox

With love your forever friend Jojo 🌻