Battling the booze

[Kazzl]

When the black dog bites, many of us reach for a drink. It can ease the pain, help us relax, block out what's going on in our minds. If it's just the odd drink now and then, even one or two a night, there's no harm and maybe even welcome relief. But for some of us, many in fact, literally drowning our sorrows becomes a problem in itself. We drink more and more until the booze takes over, and drinking becomes all we want to do. 

That was me for a long time until I finally realised the combination of booze and depression would kill me. If I wanted to live, if I wanted to be able to manage my depression, I had to get sober. I did, nearly five years ago, and it's the hardest thing I've ever done.

If booze is controlling you and you're not controlling it, this thread is for you. If you want to regain control - get sober or moderate your drinking (which for many is harder than quitting) or if you're worried you are drinking too much, join us here.

On this thread I'll talk about my battle with the booze and offer advice and support to anyone who is struggling. I welcome anyone who's been there or is worried they are going there, to join in. And I hope others now living sober will come here to help our friends who are struggling.

One thing this thread is not is a place to discuss how much a drink or two helps you. It's not an anti-alcohol thread, but it's not a general discussion about alcohol either. It's for people who are genuinely worried about it or who want to control it, and it's a place of celebration (without judgment about drinkers) for those of us who are now living sober.

I hope anyone who's battling the booze will join us.

Cheers 😀

Kaz 

[Shining_Star]

Thanks Heoff,

i must admit during the 3.5 weeks it enlightened me to the triggers which I struggled though to not drink but did get too hard in the end but I guess it’s still a learning curve to work out how to avoid the booze.

[geoff]

Hello Mg, and a warm welcome to the forums.

A good but honest comment and what you have said does happen not only to you but other people as well.

When we decide to drink, we never worry about how we are going to feel the next day, that's furthest from our mind, we drink for a reason or we may find an excuse to dull our feelings or what's been happening at work, any social life we do have or because of our relationship/marriage or there may not be any reason and don't take any blame for relapsing, it's happened to me after a few months, something went horribly wrong, so I started once again.

(Now as I've said before I only socially drink and have done so for a number of years.)

Being a cupboard drinker we can hide for a little while, but if say that we're not drinking, we will be caught out, the mints we chew will be a give-away.

I'm sorry that you had an accident and needed to go to the hospital, but you don't have to do this all by yourself, there are plenty of people here to support you, and if possible I'd like to know about the small steps you have taken, and please don't be afraid, I'm really happy you have posted your comment.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

[geoff]

Hi SS, there are a couple of options you can choose from if you like.

Your doctor can prescribe a particular medication that will stop 'the want to drink', it can be in tablet form or be administered via an implant, I've tried it in tablet form.

If you drink while taking it, then it won't reduce the effects of alcohol that it causes but it will reduce the feeling of intoxication and the desire to drink anymore, so it takes away the buzz alcohol produces, so you talk with your doctor.

The other option is to when it's time to drink or when you need a drink is to fill up a big glass of fizzy drink, lemonade, tonic water or such, and drink the whole glass, not a sip but all of it, then grap an apple or such and eat it, this will fill your belly up so you won't want any alcohol.

Please let us know how you get on.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

[Fema]

Hi all,

I’m new here so hello! I feel a bit stupid writing this but what’s the harm?! I went out with friends yesterday for a boozy brunch with lasted all day and I have the absolute fear today... I’m so anxious and feel terrible. I generally only drink on the weekends but I’m a real lightweight and drink far more than I should and end up getting myself in such a state and can’t remember anything the next day. I hate that I drink Fri-Sun and I hate how much I drink. I really want to cut back on how much I’m drinking because with how rubbish and anxious I feel for days after, it’s just not worth it.

Moral of the story... I feel embarrassed and ashamed after I get myself so drunk and I’m sick of feeling that way. I’m pretty social and wondered if anyone has tips on how I can cut back/stop drinking? I know it’ll be really hard but I just want to get out of the routine I’ve gotten myself into.

Thanks and Happy Monday!

[geoff]

Hello Fema, and thanks for opening this thread up once again.

There are a few ideas I could suggest, firstly if you can go to your doctor, they can discuss this issue with you and then advice a couple of ways how to help you.

There is a type of medication they can prescribe which reduces the desire to drink alcohol but this will only work if you want to stop the addiction of drinking, it won't work if you want to just cut down as it stops the person from getting any buzz.

I've taken it and drinking alcohol only wastes the money you spend and any temptation by your friends offering you a drink, you'll need to have a reason, such as 'you can't drink taking a medication you're on'.

Try and avoid the pub at the weekends but if you still go order a soft drink it's the bubbles that seem to fill up your tummy and drink it quickly.

If you can't stop drinking after having one drink and need to keep going, then to have a social drink, will be difficult to sustain.

Ask your doctor about this medication and they may also want to do a blood test and the results could be a reason why you need to stop.

Hope you can get back to us.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

[Clare1234]

Hi V,
I had something similar happen this weekend. Your post helped me to feel like I wasn't alone! Thank you ! I hope things are better for you.
C

[Lily78]

Hello, I've been struggling for awhile now due to a couple of things. It's taken some time for me to finally realise how much I was reliant and numbing myself with alcohol and benzos. It's also taken awhile to find the right help with a gp and psychologist. I know I am on the right path but can't help feeling angry at doctors who just hand out script after script of these pills which I now think has slowed down my recovery. I feel like a failure, like I've wasted many years of my life. I'm not sure if any of this makes sense. I feel so alone and such a mess.

[geoff]

Hello Lily, and thanks for posting your comment and please don't feel alone.

We drink alcohol for numerous reasons, to entertain, to relax, or to help us make a decision or to numb our depression which could be caused by a multitude of problems which may then lead to addiction and what that entails is up to the person's discretion.

Unfortunately, names of medication aren't allowed, but before the alcohol was making your recovery to be slightly easier and now if you have stopped the drinking then you have to rely on your own thoughts.

When we drink daily then we rely on the alcohol to keep us going from one day to the next, but it's not fair to say that you have wasted many years of your life looking back, simply because the situation where or why you drank alcohol completely different to being sober.

The thought patterns aren't the same.

Please get back to us.

Geoff.

[ShesApples]

Hi Fema,

I can really relate to your post. Every week I tell myself that’s it! No more drinking! I pep myself up all week, I do my meditations, I cut out caffeine, I read up on the affects of alcohol on anxiety and depression...then the weekend comes and someone will offer me a drink and I will jump at it. Then I’ll have another one, then another one.

The next day I’ll torment myself over what I said or how I behaved, I’ll tell myself I failed, or that I’m just like my mum who has very extreme alcoholism, that there is something in me that is bad and wrong.

I think the pressure I put on myself makes it even worse and it sounds like it might be a little bit similar to how you’re feeling. I hate it and I’m sorry you’re going through it too.

I feel like I have two people inside me, one who likes quiet nights in with my dog, reading books and drinking tea, and one who is a complete train wreck and out of control.

Thanks for letting me vent on your post, I think I just needed to get all that out.

Hope you’re feeling better since your post x

[PhaseA]

Hi

I'm tapering off alcohol and I don't like it.

I'm the same sheapple I would be happy at home pottering around all the time and I don't know how things go wrong.

Cheers

PA