Anyone had to spend days alone without anyone to talk to?

[Hanna3]

Hi all, apart from here and a brief visit to church last night (to make it feel Christmassy and to just be with people) I've had day after day for weeks now with nobody at all to talk to. This time of year especially it's really depressing. Old friends that live far away are gradually losing contact with me - I ring them but they don't ring me. I understand they're busy with their live elsewhere but still it's hard when you're lonely. I'm going to a Christmas Eve service at the local church tomorrow night to at least be with people for a little while... but otherwise all day I'm alone, just me and the dog. Sometimes I strike up a conversation on BB but then the other person disappears and that's the end of that...

How are people meant to cope with prolonged periods of social isolation? I read, I watch DVDs, normally I'd go for long walks with the dog but thick smoke from bushfires and intense hot weather have stopped that. I go to a café alone sometimes. Any ideas/help?

[Hanna3]

Hi Paws, Sam just sent you a furry hug on the BB Social Forum!

Thanks for those numbers. I'm not feeling so bad I want to do anything extreme, just really hit a low it's so boring and I spend day after day alone. I have joined a book club that meets next Thursday at 5pm.. but it's an effort to front up to a new group too.

One of my friends from Small Coastal Town rang me this morning because she is missing my company. I'm lonely too. I guess it's nice someone is missing me!

The two GPs were dreadful. The first one was so rude, I've since spoken to people who know of others who refuse to ever see her she was so nasty so it's not just me. It seems she decided to be nice to some people and others she singles out to be really rude to. I've had another GP at the same practice recommended as being very kind, so I have an appointment next Thursday and we'll see. Finding a new GP when you're on these medications is hard as they seem to assume that you're crazy (I'm not) and you're an addict! The prejudice is hard to take.

A really boring day today but it's hot and muggy and not much we can do. I once knew an elderly lady who managed to get her little dog certified by her GP as a companion animal so she could take her into the shopping centre with her - animals can give so much support can't they? I can understand you going out to hug your dog when you feel overwhelmed. The support a dog can give is wonderful so I miss Sam not being by my side.

My friend isn't going away until Sunday but will be away for a week, so we will be able to use her house for several days, which will be nice to have some aircon and a change for Sam as he can explore her garden and be cool for a while.

Thanks for posting and another furry hug from Sam!

[Paw Prints]

Hello Hanna3,

Thank you Sam for the furry hug... Iuckily woofa was busy barking at a ferocious leaf so he didn't see.

Oh I really hope the new GP is nice... I know what you mean about changing to a new GP... the GPs here keep leaving & I find it really stressful having to fight to get a script from the new one... though my current GP is lovely & easy to talk to...

Almost a whole week of air con bliss... you won't know yourselves. Perfect for sitting comfortably, reading the chosen book of your new book club.... do let me know what book they choose.

Today was our hottest day for the week... so what did I do... I got a craving for fried dim sims.... I'm not big on fried food normally & when I have them it's usually steamed... so 4 oclock found me standing watching dim sims fry... adding heat to heat.... even woofa didn't want a share. I must confess they were nice & followed by a lemonade icy pole.... yummm

I definitely lead a wild life when cooking dim sims is the highlight of my day 😁

Hugs to you & Sam

Paws

[Hanna3]

Hi Paws! Dim sims sound nice - I'm on cold chicken and salad here because it's too hot to cook anything! Although I munch on things during the evening which is not helping my weight... and I love lemonade ice blocks from Coles, so does Sam, they are great when it's hot and you want something cool.

I don't know if this new GP will prescribe a schedule 8 drug, it's one they have to phone up the govt and get approval for, I was put on it long long ago before they knew it was addictive, but the difference it made to my life was incredible - stopped the awful panic attacks and I was able to cope more or less. But they halved the dose when I moved here, with no supervision, and today it's occurred to me to wonder if my increasing anxiety and depression are at least partly related to the massive decrease in dose...

I'm staying in bed until around 11am to rest while it's cool and also because I can't face the day.. am so anxious and shaking. I'm finding this town too big to navigate around, I can't find parking, I get lost. Poor Sam only gets a short stroll in the park in the evening now when it's cooled down enough...

I have an old friend in the city who was my wonderful GP for years, he keeps in touch with me every couple of weeks or so by a quick phone call, I've just emailed him to ask his opinion whether the massive halving of my anti-anxiety drug is causing some of my problems - the GP here hasn't supervised me at all.

Yes I hate trying new doctors and so many of them are hopeless. I worked in hospitals most of my life and I used to work with trainee doctors and once of the things we emphasised was their way of greeting and talking to people - and they definitely shouldn't be rude and controlling like these doctors were.

I am missing the sea dreadfully and all our nice walks there. Poor Sam. It's great to have your support. I was trying to help greet a couple of people last night who were new, and had to contact a moderator as one sounded a bit suicidal and I didn't know how to cope, fortunately the moderator has posted to him. I was hoping someone more experienced would come on and help!

Great to hear you are OK there, I hope you are safe from all these fires. I think I am having a cup of tea with the friend who is going away this afternoon, it would be a nice visit except her two large frightening dogs try to eat Sam alive, so we have to lock them out the back and sit on the porch instead of inside in the aircon... take care xx

[Paw Prints]

Hello Hanna3,

I do wonder sometimes if some of the GPs out there got their qualifications out of a box of cereal. It makes no sense to me when they think it's ok to change our meds without first getting a detailed psych appraisal. Like you I'm on one med which needs them to make the phone call, I know I need it. It took time for my psych team in hospital & after to get a med regime which works for me. They closely monitored me with every change however small & I was surprised what a difference even a small change can make. I would not be surprised if the change to your meds is adding to your mh problems recently.

Getting your sleep when the day is cooler makes sense to me. If that means you don't get up til noon that's ok. Do what works for you in the here & now.

Just a suggestion, when I need to go to somewhere new (in the bigger town I go to for services), I usually google the town & check the google map to see the best way to get to the place & what parking there is nearby. I find it helps to reduce my anxiety at trying to find my way. Though if I'm honest I've been needing to go into town for the past week & my anxiety still isn't letting me go.

There are times when I'm so pleased Woofa isn't the best at problem solving. I took a big juicy bone out of the freezer last night & put it on a covered tray on top of the freezer to defrost over night. If he jumped up against the freezer he could probably still reach it, instead he kept going over to the freezer & sitting in front of it & staring up. I'm wondering if he was hoping it might leap off all by itself. He nearly wagged his tail off when I got it down this morning for him.

I learn't something new today. Apparently bees need to have a water supply to survive. I had thought they would get what moisture they need from the pollen & nectar, but an apiarist being interviewed on the ABC earlier said they need water sources as well. He said people could help by putting sticks & things in their birdbaths to let the bee reach the water without risk of drowning.

Oops I've waffled on long enough, I'm almost out of characters

Take care & pats to Sam

Paws

[Hanna3]

Hi Paws,

I had to laugh at your description of Woofa sitting in front of the freezer when he could have jumped up and got the food! Problem solving isn't Sam's strong suit either I'm afraid! He does try but he's only a little mutt.

Yes isn't it a pain when GPs are so reluctant to give you a drug that helps you because they're so worried you're addicted (at my age so what anyway...) - my last GP was perfectly happy with my dose and I had a full report from my old Psych saying I did well on that dose, was very good at keeping my dosage low, and had never abused drugs. Still they halved the dose which shot up my anxiety straight after moving to a new place!

I use the Google maps and directions too, usually I write out a list of which way to go, where to turn etc etc. It helps make me less anxious - I'm an anxious driver especially in places I don't know.

Did you find anything to eat? I hope so. You sounded like you needed a bit of a feed!

I started training as a nurse originally but got bullied out of it and have regretted not finishing ever since, as I went back as a volunteer nursing assistant in my 40's and absolutely loved it. Anyway I've worked with doctors most of my life so I don't like it when the GP's treat me like I'm a nut case because I've seen a Psych and am on some anti-anxiety meds! They should be more worried about the ones that need help and don't get it!

It's still over 40 degrees here at 8.15pm and the fans are blowing hot air. My friend in Queensland has been going mad with the heat in a weatherboard house and just purchased a portable aircon for the lounge and rang me today to say it had reduced the temperature in the room from over 40 to 25 after 30 minutes. I think I need one... she said her dog and cat sat down in front of it immediately and refuse to move!

Hope you're feeling a bit better. Take care, always nice to chat with you Katy. Pats to Woofa.

[Katyonthehamsterwheel]

Hi Hanna 🙂

It looks like there is a bit of a cross thread situation happening here. You've replied to Paws and I in the one post (which might have Paws a little confused), but we'll get there. Hi Paws - love the story about your Woofa and the bone hahaha

I actually took my staffy, Storm, for a quick fishing trip with my brother last night at the beach. She's never seen live fish before and we placed a couple we caught into a rock pool and she tried to eat one until it starting flopping about and scared the heck out of her! It was delightful. Gosh she makes me smile. Then there was a whole lot of joyful running in the whitewash, and I wished I felt that enthusiasm for life. Like kids they are.

Anyway my appetite is mostly back back, so that's nice. I'm feeling a little better mentally, which is why I was able to get out last night and this morning. Thank goodness.

Your studies sounds pretty interesting. What a shame you never got to do what you would have liked though. I imagine you'd be a great librarian! I thought about nursing but don't like blood and needles lol. So I've worked in nursing homes, which I really enjoyed until I couldnt' work anymore. Am absolutely loving my social work studies. The things we are learning are really diverse. There's been psychology, philosophy, human rights, etc and the unit I really enjoyed (unexpectedly!) was politics. There are times though when I've had to compulsorily attend campus and my anxiety has been a huge issue there. I failed a practical assessment due to nerves, and was lucky it only made up a percentage of the overall unit mark, or I wouldn't have been able to pass. So that's hard, and why I study off campus 🙂

Interesting to hear about your friend's portable aircon. I've always heard they are pretty rubbish and so have never bothered to purchase one. But that sounds amazing! Did she say it was very expensive? Do you think you could afford one? Maybe even on one of those payment plans? I imagine it would improve things for you immensely if you could.

Well... while I'm on a roll with feeling ok, I'm off to spectate at a local event that's taking place. I like things like that where you can just nick off if you're feeling overwhelmed, and you don't have to talk to anyone while you're there either if you don't want. Perfect for me 🙂

Chat later. Hugs and pats to the fur friends in the room x Katy

[Hanna3]

Sorry Paws sorry Katy looks like I got my replies mixed up! I think it was the heat last night... Oops!

[Hanna3]

Hi Katy, sorry for the mixup ( hi Paws & sorry too!) - it was so hot last night I got about two hours' sleep it was dreadful so I blame it on my brain overheating!

How did you find the quality of care giving in Aged Care Katy? I worked in palliative care as a volunteer nursing assistant and I absolutely loved it, but it's very sad at times too of course. But to make someone feel more comfortable made me feel wonderful.

I would enjoy social work I've looked at textbooks of it sometimes and it would be interesting. When I started Uni for the first semester they insisted we had to study anthropology, psychology and sociology, before deciding which one we would major in. Anthropology did fascinate me, and later bioethics because I was working in hospitals and it was very relevant. I thought of studying something here but the thought of days spent working on essays again put me off I'm afraid!

I'm glad you're having an outing you sound better, and sounds like you and your dog and your brother had a great time last night! Yes Sam loved the sea, a bit scared of the waves but as long as it was shallow he just loved it. Also digging holes in the sand and putting his head inside them - he'd come out with a face covered in sand, what a sight!

Went to my writing group today but it seems to be dominated by two men and we women can't get a word in. We are thinking of starting our own group. Oh well it was an outing. A bit cooler this evening thank goodness and Sam had a nice stroll in the park. Off to have a late dinner now. Hope you enjoy your outing!

[Hanna3]

Sorry Paws for my reply to you read my reply to Katy - oops major mistake sorry. Definite brain overheating in temperatures in the mid-40's last night. Please excuse me it was a complete accident!

[Paw Prints]

Hi Hannah3, wave to Katy,

That's ok, I was a bit bewildered at first with the end part until I saw it was for Katy. I have been following the chat in the cafe so the penny did drop. With the heat you've been having I'd be a puddle on floor unable to put one word together (forget two).

Pity the book group wasn't more inclusive. Sounds like starting a new group might be good idea. What book are you meant to read before the next meet up?

I love the image of Sam burying his head in the sand, that gave me a good chuckle. I think it very sensible of him being scared of the waves, they must look huge to him.

Paws