Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[demonblaster]

Hey there Mrs beautiful 👩‍❤️‍👩 and lovely people 👋

I hope todays been a better one for you my lovely one 🤗

The other day I left you a 🎁 in a bubble. Good I see you've opened it and probably wondering what on Earth it is.

Okay so my precious friend they're a pair of earrings that I managed after only 15 yrs 47 hrs and 23.498 seconds to make.

So here we are a few Grey hairs later 🤤... or....😲

Now you joined the bubbles to make a lovely soft pillow from your bubble bath the other day ...well I sneakyily snuck some too but it took a considerable time to pick the perfect ones that don't burst open when I'm packing them.

Ah ha...I can here you wondering how anything could possibly be inside these deflated dear little transparent bubbles. 3 per earring but they look so limp and lifeless 🤔 mmm maybe Deebis been on the slops I 👂you saying...

So to help you relax all you have to do is gently break away each bubble and breathe deeply into it and stop blowing when it turns into a psychedelic puffy little gorgeous water drip shape. Some turn different colours. I like the Sapphire and Cerise colours. The Purples metallic it's amazing and the glittery bottle Green sparkles and flickers

They fill the room with magnificent colour. So beautiful it's like a soft tranquil mist.

So my beautiful lovely when you're feeling that you need some company just squeeze the bottom one gently while in your mind thinking of a happy time with that person and you'll feel their presence and love in your heart for hours.

If you're cold gently does it darlin squeezing the top one and the most glorious sun rise appears before your eyes warming you from the soul out giving you the perfect body temperature and security.

Ok so you'll need to blow those back up before I can pack the others so I'll see you tomoz.

Love you very much dear loving friend.

Hope you have beautiful warmth in your dreams and wake feeling completely refreshed wanting to get up and feel peace within your beautiful soul.

Nigh nite everyone ☺👋

👩‍❤️‍👩💜🎁🤝👀💗💤

[Hanna3]

Hi Grandy (waves to Deebi, Paws, everyone)

Gosh it is terribly hot isn't it? How are you managing? These fibro houses are awful in this sort of weather...

Your new gardens sound lovely! What a nice thing to do.

I'm sorry about your volunteer work, but everything goes quiet over Christmas and New Year, so maybe you can make this a "rest and recover" time and next year something might come up that you feel you would like to do and can manage?

Just a thought - I've had an email from an organisation that is asking people to write a nice card to elderly people in aged care who don't have anyone to care about them at Christmas. I can do mine online as it's through an organisation I know, but what if you wrote a couple of nice cards and drew something nice or painted something nice and just gave them to a nursing home for anyone who needed them? So the staff could give them to a lonely resident who had nobody? Just a thought. The organisation I am with is just asking you to say a bit about yourself (nothing that reveals who/where exactly you are? and about your pets or family or garden.. anything that might brighten someone's day reading it. Just an idea.

Sending cooling thoughts your way oxoxoxo

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩, Hanna, Paws and everyone...🤗..

Deebi That was so beautiful..it really helped me to get out of my head...and not so alone..you have a sense of the right time to post and take me away on a fantasy trip...I read it again last night before sleeping, with some soft music playing...Thank you precious friend..

Hanna....wow yesterday was hot..it was still 35 deg in my house at 11pm....I do have an air conditioner but avoid using it if I can..,because I seem to get into an asthma coughing fit when I use it and can’t stop coughing to get enough air in my lungs....I haven’t used the lounge room one yet..but put the little portable one an hour befbed then switch it off....it helps for a while..

Thats a lovely idea about the Christmas cards...not sure if they do that here or not..probably have to ring the council here to find out...The nearest town to me W is still classified as a small town and doesn’t really have much going on...

Paws..Thank you for telling me about geraniums and snakes...Just about every house here has them...Its okay though..I like them as they seem to survive the hash climate out here....I do get concerned about next door with her chickens and ducks...She has so many since the chickens hatched and she has 14 duck eggs ready to hatch anytime now...She did have a snake in her yard once she told me..that was before I moved in here...

Howz everyone doing..keeping cool I hope..

Deebi..nice weather for you to soak your feet in the fresh cold water at the beach..I know you like water and the medicinal compounds of the water might help them..Much love to you precious bbff..💜🐻🤗..Sorry about your poor feet😢...I wish so much that they will heal quickly..

Its blowing a hot wind gale at mine today..saying indoors I think...When I woke this morning half my things on my back veranda where all over my back yard..😁..

My kindest thoughts everyone with my love and hugs..💜🤗.

Grandy..

[demonblaster]

Well Hellooo Mrs sweetyheart 👩‍❤️‍👩 and all you other sweetys 😊

Darlin I'm so glad to time our 🦄 (unicorn for magic) fantasys at the right time.

So forgot to mention why you have to blow the drip 💧shaped magic thingies is because that's your deep breathing relaxing routine. Sneaky huh.

So I see you've only managed to blow one up so far, that's just dandy love because this particular ones an absolute gem of drips 😆

Okelly dokelly ... So my besty of besties 👩‍❤️‍👩...the top one on your left ear happens to be .651 of a mm larger to the trained eye 👁... 👩‍🔬 (single eye & girl with microscope) ... because it's a boom of a surprise... ok are you sitting down.... drumroll please 🎻 oops not the violin...🥁...are there tis...

So we waited... quite a long time .... 😲 mouth wide open for yawn but anticipating choccy to her absolute pleasure Grandy lovely ever so gently squeezes her drip and the tiniest ever seen by mankind 🍫 choccy bar falls out...oh ... standing ovation from the crowd... Grandy it's deafening...but oh no... 😲 open mouthed shock this time...its no bigger than a grain of rice...😭...ohh darlin your bawling your head off ...come here sweety love to Aunty Deebi...🏃‍♀️...no darling run this way lovey... 😂...I'm so sorry that crumb must've fallen out of my sleeve and landed on your drip 💧when I hugged you..oops... got caught eating choccy before seeing you...how truly embarrassing I do say 😶....

So my dear friend your super special 🦄 treat today not yesterday soz is if you're feeling lonely and want to see your bbff and Mr 😍 Deebi and our 2 virtual puddy tat kittens 🦊🐶 oh look at them the little precious darlings...come on you know you want lots of cuddles 🤗...to come and stay... when our picture falls out of your extra big drip you very carefully have to get your furs and all dance around the piccy 3 times going up hands high... bending down hands and paws low... hopping when the bad hip hurts chanting Romper Bomper Stompa Do ...come come... come to me you... dear loving family...then out to the veranda...piccy in hand....look afar past the great Gum...here on their priceless hotted up vroom 🏍 ...comes the Deebi clan ...oh..um...awkward moment no: 6,337 ...darlin can you very quickly open your window...one of the furs is chewing at the throttle...💨...😨...😲

Love you heaps beautiful catch ya soon huns 👩‍❤️‍👩💜🤝👀🍫🏍💧

Hi Hannah and everyone ☺

[Hanna3]

Hi Grandy (waves to Deebi, Paws)

How are you going? Gosh we had hot weather, cooler today thank goodness then very hot tomorrow. Little Sam had a walk by the river this morning and a quick swim - a nice couple walking told me a snake was across the path further along...I have to take care of little Sam because of the snakes now... at least he had a walk and swim before the heat sets in again...

We live very quietly, not much you can do in the hot weather but rest... my neighbour has put up her Xmas lights all through her garden, very pretty at night - and inside the house lovely Xmas tree and nativity scene... little Sam had a play with her little fur Molly - they're friends...

Rather lonely otherwise... wish we had a friend to meet up with but nope... and everything stopping for Christmas soon anyway..

Just wanted to send waves hello and soft fluffy hugs..

I have a portable aircon in my bedroom too but it makes me cough too, I think they must get dust or mould in them... but it keeps us going in the afternoon while we have a rest on the bed..

Lots of best wishes oxoxo

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩, Hanna and everyone...🤗.

Oh I loved the end of the story Deebi...Thank you so very much..I have copied and pasted them into my notes so I don’t loose them..then they are easier to read when I am thinking of you 💚..which is everyday with much love and care..💚💜🤗🕊🐻🤗...bbff...yadimh 4 eva...l

It has been very hot here...both days and nights..it’s yucky the heat...moreso for our little fur babies I think....I gave them a haircut a few weeks ago..I’m now thinking I might try to shave them....idk I’ll see how I feel about doing that..I know I will have shaking hands...

My VS appointment is tomorrow...My usual WW supporter hasn’t counted me now for over 3 weeks....I don’t know why..since I told her I left work I haven’t heard from her...A new WW supporter is taking me tomorrow...I get anxious around new people...I am scared my usual supporter has moved away from me...I want to ring her and ask her..but I can’t...

I spent Tuesday at the hospital with Betty for over an hour before the nurse finally came out and told us there are no Drs at the hospital...She was stung by 4 bees on Monday and was looking and feeling so sick....So I then took her to her Drs..small medical centre...only one Dr there...I was getting quite stressed...then the Dr walked into the waiting room..saw her and took her straight in...a antihistamine injection and a prescription for more antihistamines...then I took her home...She is feeling much better today..

Other then Tuesday I haven’t been out or done anything..my motivation is asleep...All I seem to be doing is sleeping, one day is running into another day..with no meaning to any day..I need to get me up and find something that holds my interest for more then 5 minutes...(sigh)...

Today is cooler then it has been for a while...Thing have gone missing from Betty’s back shed and I’m sure others as well...this happens a few weeks before Christmas every year..one year it was those solas lights...Another was year was clothes from the clothes line...another year was plants and pots..this year it looks like garden tools...I keep my front gate locked now...It’s not to high that they can’t jump it...but maybe it will be too much trouble for them to jump it...

I hope everyone has a nice day today and enjoying the cooler weather if your lucky to have it...like I do..

Sending my love, hugs and care to you all..💜🤗🌹..

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy..🕊🌱💭🕷🐉

[Hanna3]

Hi Grandy (waves to Deebi)

I replied to you on my thread before I had read your post here.. I am sorry you are feeling blah .... I am the same, in the hot weather what can we do? It's too hot to do anything..

I don't understand why your support person hasn't visited you. You were kind to help Betty, ouch four bee stings would be nasty.. you're nice to help her...

I am sorry you're lonely... we are too.. little Sam lonely for other dogs to play with...

Just know that we do care about you here, you're among friends, and you sound like a lovely person that shouldn't be so lonely.. I don't think Sam and me should be either... it's such a shame we're so alone.. I wish little Sam and your furs could play together... sending waves and hugs dear lady xooxox

[Paw Prints]

Hello Grandy, wave to everyone,

Oh poor Betty, that must have been terrible for her. I'm appalled the hospital made her wait an hour before telling her there were no doctors. I know country hospitals often don't have a doctor, but it shouldn't have taken them that long. No wonder you were getting worried for her.

Lass do you think it might be helpful if you mention to your VS lass about how you feel with the ww people not being reliable?

I definitely understand your concern about trying to shave your furs. I used to have to cut my dad's hair using the electric clippers. Having to do the old short back & sides keeping the top longer, but not too long. I was especially worried about keeping everything even & not nicking him when I shaved his neck at the back.

I'm glad you have some cooler weather, hopefully that means you can sit on your verandah & soak up all the loveliness of the nature around you. Are the cows back?

Huggliest of hugs

Paws

[demonblaster]

Hi there Mrs beautiful 👩‍❤️‍👩 lovely Hannah Paws and everyone ☺

Dear Grandy I'm so glad you liked the story,GooD idea sweetyheart I'll do same cause I miss some bits at times,

Yuk your weather I tell ya my lovely if we ever get to rl contact god I wish. it'll happen.. we'd have to go at normal times if youse actually have normal there 😆. Either 🔥 or ❄ pretty hot here too but not to your degree blaghh.
It's nice the cooler break isn't it.
I smiled when Paws asked if you've been on the veranda cause you saying you probs look like a statue. 😅 some things catch you at the right times. Love your humour.

I'm winking while posting. My eyes watering like billyO. Does that at times. Just the one. I tell people I'm crying out of one eye 👁

The furs would appreciate another hair cut I reckon yip but hard you'd be worried to hurt the honeys aye lovey.

I think about your VS appts actually today again was wondering how you're managing darlin they I'd think be so draining and highly emotional. You poor love and alone geez I wish it was different for you
So glad you're getting the help you need 🤗 that's for now and this is for tomoz 🤗..that's a spare.

Wow what the heck with ww worker. Geez be decent to communicate. Do people forget they're dealing with very damaged sensitive souls. That can do no end of damage. Geez. If she's unwell they still could communicate pfftt

Sweet love I know it's hard with a new. She was once too. Hey this one might take you walking and be not so full on chatty.
Breathe beautiful darling.
I know you'll handle it all. Maybe you could explain how hard it is.
What about a text to her honey. (Usual one)
Possible she's been laid off? Or family troubles

You're both very good friends to eachother sweetygirl. You're a kind caring soul. Poor darling Betty sounded rough. Great the Doc sorted her. Big relief. Poor form at the hospital.

Yip hearing you about motivation. Easy in mania.

Been meaning to tell you we're loving channell 9life they have house buying renovations etc very interesting. It's on often daily I think. U might like too

The swines flogging stuff.
Smart girl making it harder for them. Often they're lazy and need to be quick.

Hope your physical healths ok Grandy ... do I need to be concerned lovely? Sorry but need to know out of love and care soul sisbbff 🤗

Love you very deeply Grandy. You're in my thoughts all the time starting on waking dearest friend. You mean so much darlin 😚🤗👩‍❤️‍👩💜

[Paw Prints]

Hello Grandy,

Lass I've popped over to yours to give you the biggest...gentlest...most comforting hug I can.

I'm guessing you're not feeling the best & I know beasty has been telling you fibs.

How do I know about beasty? I saw on Croix's joke thread that when Not Batman [NB] said "Thats pretty bad Grandy. as bad as..." beasty made you believe NB meant you had done wrong. Honestly lass NB didn't mean that at all. He meant "bad" in the same way the "worst" in the title of the thread is meant... Lass it was actually a compliment not a criticism.

Lass here is another hug... this one is to squish you until beasty pops out of your ears & runs away from all the love & good stuff hugs make us feel...

Woofa sends doggy snuffles

Paws