Hi Sunflower,
Thats great you are bringing the emotions to light.
I once experienced something similar. The person was very dear to me and together we had moments of fun, sadness and bliss.
When we had to separate the days just stopped being nicer. I lost faith that things will ever get better. I lost all the energy even to be slightly functional to take care of my health or work. It was really difficult to sleep and I hated the morning where I had nothing to look forward. People would tell me that it would get better but I didn’t have any ability to believe or even comprehend it.
Today, 5 years Later I don’t feel that pain. I stopped feeling hopeless even after 3rd year. It was extremely gradual but I finally got recovered from the loss.
I now know happiness which is very different from what I used to experience. I feel self-worth rather than self-pity and I am using my time effectively to bring happiness and joy in others and myself.
I shared the above experience in a hope that you might get something out of it. Even though you won’t be able to believe that things could ever get better , it does.
Time is the real healer. If possible rely on a support group and stay close to the people who you would give some considerations.
I wish you good luck and speedy recovery.
