Hi,
Now I understand why 2020 is the worst. at the beginning of the year I was living a normal life as a 15 yr old and I continued on to do so. I came across many friends who just hated this yr so bad because of remote learning and stuff. for me that wasn't that bad because I loved staying home and avoid seeing people.
things were going good until July where my mum had her hands turned purple. she went to the hospital and came back being diagnosed with TNBC (triple negative breast cancer). My mum is the type who hides her pain VERY well with her smile. I had really high hopes that she would heal. but as days passed on, her condition got worse. Her death is not what scarred me and made me painfully sad. It is the amount of pain she went through and me just sitting there not knowing what to do just broke me into tears.
every time I go home from school, the first thing I do was to always go see my mum, she would always be there in the kitchen cooking food for us.
And now I go home with no scent of her cooking, no sound, just complete silence. The light that used to lit up the house is gone. the warmth of her hug has disappeared. she never cared or spent money on herself. she needed new clothes but she wanted to spend her money on us and other people.
People with the kindest heart leaves the best memory and at the same time the worst pain.
I hope I can find someone who can relate to me because it is hard. Grief is something that will never heal completely. I don't want to feel alone anymore.
Thank you for reading this.
