Moved from Melbourne to Fraser Coast & “really struggling……”

[daydreambeliever1967]

It’s been almost a month & I want to go back. My partner & I planned this move in 2017 - but I wasn’t ready to come now.

He was. He’s ecstatic & I am slowly falling apart internally. 
I left a job I loved of 14 years.

We are both at retirement age - but I wasn’t ready. I miss the seasons. I hate the heat & yes I have lived in QLD before, but years ago - the humidity is BEYOND & we are on the coast.

I am constantly on the verge of tears & not being honest with friends & family when they ask “how are you settling in?”

My partner is golf mad which has always suited me, but now I feel so very isolated.

I want to flee. My anxiety is thru the roof.

I am shaky & teary all the time.

He is caring & concerned but has no idea just how bad I am.

Is there anyone out there that has been through this? Will it pass? I’m not feeling up to joining “clubs” of any sort atm.

I don’t want to break down in front of strangers etc
All ideas, thoughts & advice welcome x

[daydreambeliever1967]

Hi - thanks for checking in. Struggling along one day at a time. Clearly the same as you have been doing for years.

Sending postive vibes right back to you from Horrible Fraser Coast XX

[daydreambeliever1967]

Just wanted to check in on you for Christmas - I do hope you are doing okay today on the GC 🙏 Things are the same on the FC - I don’t think I can keep doing this for much longer 😔 Anyway, sending wishes to you.

Sally x

[daydreambeliever1967]

How are you holding up atm?

Sending positive vibes X Sally

[bayblue]

You poor lady. Yes, I am going thru a very similar situation as yourself. I hate the heat & despise the humidity. When I get all sweaty, my anxiety goes up etc. It's horrible. All I can suggest for you - and I do hope you have aircond - is to find an indoor hobby that you can lose yourself in. It's childish to some; but I thoroughly enjoy colouring-in. I am also learning to channel my inner artist by dabbling in some painting and resin art. I also bought myself a small motor scooter to get around on - I LOVE IT. You never know, you could be a whiz at bonsai, terrariums, tile mosaics, wood-working, oil painting, water colours, embroidery, yoga. Have a think about what you enjoyed as a child or young adult, and re-visit. Don't be afraid or embarrassed to have a go at something new. And indoors to boot. And you really should open up to your husband. He needs to know how much you're struggling. Perhaps he can even help you get going on your new indoor hobby. There WILL be days when it's not so humid and you can get out and about to enjoy the area. Learn about the local weather/climate so you can plan ahead for outdoor activities. Good luck😘😍

[daydreambeliever1967]

Thank you for your response & kind suggestions. Yes have air conditioning - thank god. I’ll try & find something to do indoors as you suggest - but the Summer looms long & depressing in front of me right now & all I can think about is getting the hell out of QLD. I will keep trying though. Again, thank you x

[daydreambeliever1967]

• Just checking in on you & wanted to let you know that I am done with Queensland & am moving back to Melbourne on Friday. I’ve tried so hard since the start of November but I cannot stay here. My partner is happy & entrenched & he will stay here.
• i can hardly wait to feel the seasons but it is also very sad as we still love each other - but I can’t imagine ever living here again. I do hope you’re doing okay. Sally x

[Real-Struggler]

Hi Sally

Things have been so bad with me.  I am do depressed and hate my life. I simply don’t know how I am going to live here any longer. I am seeing a psychiatric but that is not helping at all. I am hating GC so much so I said to my family if I die then I don’t want to be buried here. Yes this is how much I am hating life here. I hate the people and the struggle is real. My relationship with my husband and my kids is deteriorating. I always end the day with shouting at them and they cry before they do to sleep every night. 
I wish I could talk to you since you can relate to my experience and what I am going through.
I am so happy for you that you have moved back to the place where you feel belong. I hope you are happy and settled now. I would definitely have left this place but my kids are so young (12 & 10) and they are very attached to their father. So I can’t move away and leave them alone. 
I am so happy for you. Sending you love x

[Real-Struggler]

Hi Sally

I am so happy for you. Well done on taking the decision and to put yourself first.

I am not doing well at all. If fact, things have gotten so so bad. My Christmas was horrible and so is the last 3 months. I am even thinking of  t a k i n g  m y  o w n . It is really bad here. I wish I could talk to you as you can relate. Sending you lots of positive vibes and love

[daydreambeliever1967]

Please know you can contact me anytime. Please try & stay sane. Hopefully the weather will be passable for the next 6 months. Yes I went home & it was wonderful for a few weeks. I eventually had to come back as my belongings are still here on the coast (furniture etc) I need to plan a lot more & left in a huge rush. So I’ll stay on whilst the weather is cooler & plan better for the final move. Text me your number please so we can talk. It may help both of us & we are only a few hours apart by car btw.

Sending strength & hugs. Sally x 

[daydreambeliever1967]

I tried to send my ph no but it was removed as apparently it is not allowed:( But know I am thinking of you & here if you need anytime.

With the cooler weather over the next 6 months it’s probably time to sit down with your husband & the kids & say it’s finally your turn to have a choice? At least without the disgusting Summer heat you may be able to articulate clearly but firmly.

You should be able to have as much say as they do. Reach out anytime you need. Sally x