Looking for someone to talk to

[Indy_Star]

Hi I am 40 have had depression since I was a teenager. I have never taken antidepressants because I’m scared of the physical effects because I’ve also had a lot of health problems and I’m super into natural therapies. I just had a terrible weekend I came to visit my family and bc of my depression I was horrible to be around and just made them all feel sad and bad like a toxic explosion. I love them and hate that this happened. I think if I could have someone who I could be honest with about my feelings and thoughts even though I know they are negative and crazy right when they arise that that could help me? Instead of it getting stuck inside and just escalating till I want to die.

[Ggrand]

Hello Indy,

Welcome to the BB Forums.

Im so really sorry your struggling so hard with depression.

Depression makes as feel sad and not really wanting company at times, and I think when someone friends or family see a loved one sad, they tend to start feeling the same..

Indy, I heard that you don't like AD meds, and that's fine, but I was wondering if you have thought of professional councilling with a psychologist, in my opinion, depression is very hard to fix on your own, if you had someone away from the family to talk things over with it might help you start on your wellness journey..

When I start with negative thoughts, I find a way to distract them, by doing something that I like doing..umm internet games, like jigsaws, solitaire,crosswords,sudoku, someith that needs you to concerntrate on, to take your thoughts away from the negative ones ..

I think that unless people have had depression or anxiety and other mental health issues, they just don't understand, and it is hard for them..

This is your thread now Indy, you can use it anytime you feel to, to vent or just to talk to some of the wonderful people here. Also if you feel to have a look around the forums if you want to join in a conversation on another thread.

I hope Ive helped a little, I'm not far away today if you feel to talk..also a few more lovely people are likely to join in this conversation with their insight and suggestions..

I hope the rest of your day will be good.

Warm and caring thoughts,

Grandy..

[quirkywords]

Indy Star,

I too wish to welcome you to the forum. This is a caring, friendly and supportive place with people like Grandy who has some helpful suggestions.

I think talking to a doctor or a counsellor about how you feel and learn about different strategies you can use, may help. Also on the Beyond Blue website there is information about different treatments for depression.

This is the place that you can be honest with your thoughts and people here will support you.

Also if you look at other threads you may find posts that may help you and you may also be able to help others as well. Just by writing here, other people will read what you have written and will relate to your posts.

I find writing down my thoughts in a journal also helps. Have you tried that?

It is hard when being around family, I used to pretend I was ok, but this just made me worse.

Does your family know about your depression?

Feel free to post whenever you like.

Thanks so much for being honest and sharing your post.

Quirky

[Indy_Star]

Thank you so much for taking the time to write to me - I am very touched and moved that a stranger would do that and especially be so understanding. I am seeing a transpersonal psychotherapist and she is really helpful but I can only get into see her once a month. My family knows about my depression but they don't really understand it. They just get sad because I am sad and then I feel guilty because I am spreading the badness. They tell me just to smile and think positive. I am not depressed all the time, in between times I am a postive person who has a really good life. It comes on me like a fever with strong feeling of despondency that then just escalate until I feel totally crazy. Anyway I am so much better today - thanks again so much for responding - really helped.

[Indy_Star]

Thanks so much for taking the time to write to me. My family knows but doesn't really understand - they think I can control it and it just makes them feel bad. I'm glad I found this site and will use it to reach out in the future. I feel 100x better today - It's so strange how my system just seems to go into meltdown and I can't stop it. But I have a great therapist and am going to try really hard to catch it early and reach out for help next time.

Thanks again

Dale

[Ggrand]

Hello Indy,

I loved reading your last post here,mit was so uplifting for all the readers out there. thank you very much for sharing that depression can change and it is only a phase that we go through..

Indy I really think that unless you have struggled with mental health you just don't understand it ..That's why imo that others just don't understand our journeys...

Im never far away from these forums or your thread, I'll be keeping an eye out for your next post...

Warm and caring thoughts,

Grandy..