I've decided that hope is the real killer.

[Jimmy6789]

I really don't see the point anymore hey, nothing goes right for me ever which is how I'm a 29 year old bartender with crippling depression and no hopes of a better job.

I've done 2 degrees in boring business, am way too old to go back to uni and keep kidding myself that life gets better.

On top of the no hope for future career prospects, I'm 29 and haven't had a relationship for a decade - women just do not find my hideous face appealing, or even interesting.

And I get it, we all try to punch upwards in the dating game - but I'm dyyying for a human connection that I find mentally and physically attractive, and can feel that reciprocated.

This whole "he needs a car, a 6 figure job, looks like a Hemsworth, has a 6 pack of abs and has time to take me nice places" mentality is killing me.

Anyway, I've done some thinking - and have decided that the "feeling" that it will all work out is just part of the fabrication that we as a society tell ourselves.

Hope is the lie. There is no point to anything. Nothing gets better.

Help me see otherwise please, I am sliding towards the self harm section with every thought.

Ps. Therapy is expensive 

[Sophie_M]

Hey Jimmy, 

Thanks for reaching out here,
 
We're sorry to hear how hopeless you feel. We empathise with your feelings of frustration and understand the pressure placed on us to succeed. Please know you aren't alone in these feelings and we hope we can explore them more a bit more with you here. 

If you feel up to it, we'd also encourage you to reach out to our Beyond Blue Support Service, which is available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 3pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport. One of our friendly counsellors will be able to talk through these feelings with you and can offer support, advice and referrals. 
 

[Succulent Queen]

Yep, $100 after rebate is utterly ridiculous I agree. And so are Hemsworth muscles. Can I ask what type of girls youre going for? Car, six figures and a six pack sounds fairly demanding,like something a soulless twerking Kardashian might aspire to in a man. Are those standards set by your social circle or by you? There are plenty of normal women wandering around out there who dont care about those kinds of things. Youre pretty hard on yourself too, hideous face no job prospects etc. Bartenders are pretty good talkers and great with people arent they? Im guessing from the way you write youve got that going for you too. Most women really only want someone monogamous who can make them laugh and looks become more irelevant as people age and mature emotionally. I think it has also become more appealing to have a flashy bicycle over a merc these days especially if you live in the inner northern suburbs of Melbs:)

Hope isnt the lie here, its depression that lies. You sound like a good person, I really want you to take it easy and look after yourself tonight.