I need to hear encouragement

[Chris D]

Even though i have been told that i have given some inspirational msgs, i need them said to me please. As i cannot recognise them myself. I feel unappreciated, i feel i put out more than what comes back to me so it makes me feel very flat, very down and lacking energy. I don't know why i bother trying to help people. If people want me to stay on here, be there for them  and be there light for them, then i need alot of encouragement as i can't do it on my own. I fee llike i'm dragging a massive pile of boulders up a mountain and they are trying to pull me back down. I need to hear supporting msgs otherwise i can't be strong for people including myself, i can't give inspirational msgs to help others pick themselves up. I wonder sometimes who is going to pick me up when i'm down. I just feel so alone, lost in a dark cold forest.

Kind Regards

Chris

[Jo3]

Chris,

I am so pleased to see your name on here today.  I'm glad that you haven't left here for good.

You know, when I read your very first post here you were in a very dark place.  But after a few chats and what you have written back to me especially I can see that you have changed.  And changed for the better.  You are making progress, even though you may not see it. 

I can see it, you reply to a lot of us with the most beautiful messages of inspiration and courage and strength. 

Please stay on here and we can all help each other.

Please take care, hope to chat again soon

 Jo

[geoff]

dear Chris, from being suicidal to where you are now has been a great step forward, but this doesn't mean that your out of the woods.

It's been a terrific that you have been able to support and advice so many people on this forum, and you wouldn't be able to do any of this unless you had some strength building up, but this doesn't happen over night, it's a progressive person who wants to improve, and a determination to be able to achieve any of this, and it's slowly beginning to happen to you.

Depression will never be overcome by a click of the finger, why, because it's such a horrible, mean, teasing illness, it wants everybody who has it to fight to the end, and it won't let go, so we fight and then fight some more, beating off it's darkness and cunning way.

So by you replying to other people is a way to tackle depression from a different angle, and depression hates this, it wants us to suffer, but by 'hook and by crook' you won't let this happen.

Stay strong Chris, it's in you and I can tell for sure. Geoff.

[Jo3]

Hey Chris,

How are you this morning?  Been thinking of you and hope you're okay.

What plans do you have for today?

Take care, chat soon

Jo

[Mares73]

Morning Chris, I too have been checking to see whether you've stayed with us on the forum. That's because I care not because I'm checking up on you. I'm really sort to hear that someone has upset you with their words or response to you. That can be very upsetting especially when you are feeling vulnerable and in need of positive support. I think I mentioned to you in a earlier message as to whether you could share what happened (without mentioning names) and then we could support you a bit more as we would know what is upsetting you and causing you to consider leaving the forum. We who care about you would listen to what happened to make you feel this wY-we wouldn't judge you, we would just support you by being here to help you get through this situation that is obviously upsetting you so much. Please know there are so many of us who care about you and would be upset you left the forum because of one persons comments. Please think about sharing the experience with us as it's always easier once it's shared with people who do genuinely care for you. You have shown so much strength & courage getting this far/I'd be very upset if one persons comments and attitude made you leave the forum. Don't give them that much power. Like you say to others "be strong" and we are hear and more than willing to listen to your experience which may help you feel less alone and isolated. Can you think about doing that? In meantime I'm thinking of you and hoping so much that you will open up & share the story of what's upset you so much. You have shown great courage to get to this point, please keep going-we all appreciate and value and care about you. Have a think and try get back to us. Mares x

[Neil_1]

Hi Chris

I’m sorry to hear that you’re in a low place at the moment … but then again, I guess for the most part, nearly all of us are in a similar situation.  Sometimes it’s hard to think beyond the boundaries of who you’re replying too, and you know you’ve got your own issues, but you get in and respond to another person, because they’ve sent out a message, a call for help, if you will and so that is what we do.  We try to assist and support others in their particular times of need.

You’re a brilliant and strong person Chris and you are definitely very much appreciated.  To be on here and to be thrusting out your support to others when you know you’re in a deep dark place and I’m really really glad that you’ve sent this message.  I guess what I’m trying to say from my opening paragraph is that we’re all here to support and help as much as we can to anyone … but I guess on the whole, we do it when we see messages for help.  What else I’m trying to say is, I’m now right beside you on that mountain and am helping you pull those boulders up.  To hell with it, let’s throw some out and lighten the load.   We also have Jo and Mares up on this mountain as well.  

And when I say you’re strong, I do mean it … as you being in a bad place, but still are able to assist so many others.

We care about you Chris.  

Cheers  

Neil

[Teejay]

Chris, I'm sorry I'm really awkward and never know what to say.  But from the bottom of my heart I wish for nothing but good things to come your way.  I send strength and serenity vibes.

[Stephen123]

Hi Chris, I will try and say something that might pick you up a bit.

I have been incredibly majorly depressed at times over the last 20 years. I have had to lie in bed with my guts churning and my mind telling me some pretty terrible things.

I have been terribly insane and been locked up for it. Something kept me going, sure I had thoughts of ending it all but all I did was kept saying to myself " keep going these bad feelings are not going to last forever and I WILL have good days"  

I got through some pretty tough times Chris and I,ve gotten rid of all the negative things in my life and I now live a fairly mentally healthy life. I spilled my guts to doctors and psychs and tried to act on the advice they gave me, thanks to them and my wife I,m still here.

Are you totally alone Chris? Do you have friends and family to support you? Can you search for a counsellor that gets you? Can you ring beyond blue and ask their advice?

I,m sorry for asking questions but there is an awful lot of help out there these days. I think you just need to identify what the major issue is and go to someone that specialises in that area, if you look around that cold dark forest Chris you,ll see a gap in the trees somewhere, that,s the light that you must follow.

But you must look for the light Chris. Then you must take a step toward it. Doesn't matter how you do it Chris, ringing beyond blue, typing it on this forum whatever way you feel comfortable, you just need to speak up Chris. We,re all behind you %100.

We have been posting our little hearts out for you Chris please keep going.  

[Chris D]

Hi All,

Thankyou for all of your supporting msgs, really apprecieate them all. I had to take a break from replying to you all, as i have been very up and down & there is only so much downess i can take. i have been here reading your msgs, so from the bottom of my heart i say thankyou to all of you. I am a very sensitive person, i take almost everything to heart.

I had some sad news yesterday morning, a family member has been diagnosed with a tumor. The operation is in Feb.

Sorry if i don't reply to each of your threads i do read what you all posts and threads but i'm just really lacking alot of energy and motivation and even just posting this is saping alot of energy from me. Even though i'm not having thought of harming myself i just feel sad and down, it's as if something is missing from inside. I have this massive hole in me and have tried different things including meeting new people to try and fulfill it but it still comes back. I hate it, i wish it would go away and stay away for gd.

Sorry everyone no inspirational msgs today, mayb sunday or at least bfore xmas. I'm up and down like a yoyo doesn't make sense i can't get my head around it. Oh well. Have more important things to think about.

Kind Regards

Chris

[Jo3]

Hi Chris,

I'm so sorry to read about your family member.  My thoughts and prayers are with you and the family member.  

These times are tough, I pray that you will be okay.  

Thinking of you, stay strong,

Jo