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I have no soul
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I have no soul. My feelings towards people are getting less and less...
I dont like myself and i dont expect any one to like me either! Nor do i want them too
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Hello Nosoul, welcome to the forums. I'm really glad you've posted here. I know that wasn't an easy thing to do and I hope you'll feel comfortable enough to talk to us more and share what's going on for you.
You say your feelings towards people are getting less and less. Can you tell me a bit more about that? Do you feel disconnected or distant when you're with others? Like there's a barrier or a gulf between you? Or is it that you have a dislike for people or that you don't feel you can trust them? Do you feel you're not worthy of them?
Sorry for so many questions, I'd just like to know more about you so we can chat more.
One thing I would suggest is have a read around the website, look at the resources we have on depression and see if they ring a bell with you. Maybe also look for some information on dissociation - that's when we develop a sense of distance from people and events. Like we don't feel present, emotionally or mentally, in a place or situation even though we are physically there.
And, if you want to talk with a professional, you can call our helpline on 1300 22 4636.
Have you spoken with your doctor about how you feel? It would be a good idea.
Things don't have to be this way Nosoul. But I think you need a bit of help right now.
Hope you come back to us, we're here for you.
Kaz
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Hi there Nosoul and welcome to the BB forums!
I think it would be great for you to elaborate on what you mean by your post but from what I can get, I feel that it's normal for people to sometimes be a little bit apathetic towards what other people are facing in their lives. Sometimes it's a result of selfishness which is not always a bad thing. I think that its good to put yourself first or otherwise you can get overwhelmed with everyone running to you to be their "emotional tampon" which is something that I have often faced in my life.
It's okay to not like every part of yourself, if anything, any flaws that we feel that we have can help us to move forward and develop our strengths to become the person we want to be. One thing that I don't like about myself is how I over think a lot of things and I have a hard time letting go of situations and constantly replay what other people have said or did to me in my head and what image I was projecting but I feel that it's something I definitely need to work on and that's okay.
From your post, what I can gather is maybe you have a protective shell around you and maybe don't want to get emotionally close to people out of fear or judgement maybe, that they won't invest in time and resources in you because maybe you feel that you are not worth it within yourself?
I think that with some small and simple steps, you can grow as an individual who likes who they are and develop a healthy self-esteem.
Talking to a GP would be a great place to start!
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Each and everyone of us has a soul...it is just that mental/emotional conditions can easily make us lose track of it. It doesn't mean it has stopped to exist.
Many of us can relate to this feeling of disconnection from others, situations and our own feelings. When Life has been unkind of us, this distancing can be a self protection mechanism.
You are obviously in a negative head space at the moment. The good thing is that it doesn't have to be a permanent residence. Neither do you need to struggle alone. With help and support, things can get better. Well done for making the decision to post here.
Please feel free to do it again, as much and as often as you feel comfortable with. This is a safe network to connect with caring, understanding people who find themselves in a dark place or have been there before. It is also a good outlet to just let steam of.
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Hi Nosoul, you're not the only one on the forums feeling like this - we have another member called interloper who has a thread below - some of our champions and Dr Kim have responded in there. It might be a helpful read for you:
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Hello yes you have a soul
I just had to refer to you like that,I hope that is okay? because the fact is you do have a soul.
Perhaps you have sort of hid it inside yourself or something, sort of like a protecting thing. Do you think that might be right?
I think that is what some of us do sometimes, myself included. Like protecting ourselves, by sort of unknowingly placing a wall around ourselves. So then we don't feel anything or something like that. We don't feel good stuff or painful stuff. A numbness I guess. It can be hard for us to receive love and give love out, because the wall blocks it. So maybe that is what you are doing, when you say the feelings you have for other people are less and less. You are slowly putting up the walls.
Anyway I wanted you to know I care about you. And also that you must be alive a little bit on the inside, because you have chosen to reach out to Beyond Blue. So good on you for doing that.
Bye now
Shelley
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I agree that a sensitive soul will recoil in horror at the negative side of "evolution". Conditions like depression blindfold us to the fact that the chaos of worldly affairs is only one side of the whole story. Civilizations have come and gone from times immemorial. The human world always had its heroes and its villains. My time here at BB has shown me that this space is crowded with many heroes, supporting each other to rise above distress and painful situations.
What do you think compelled you to reach out via these forums, if not the faint voice of a soul trapped under emotional rubble ? Kudos to you for listening. You have come to the right place, you are welcome with open hearts.
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