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I feel like I’m wasting my teen years

Ofosol_4
Community Member

I am 16 years old and I’m scared to go out and not because of social anxiety. My parents start huge arguments over petty things I do when I am out. For example last night I was out at my best friends house and didn’t answer my phone for one hour because I was watching tv. My parents have made a big deal out of it and yelled at me over dinner saying I would never be able to sleep out again. I feel like it’s not worth going out sometimes because of these arguments so I’m waiting 18 months till I’m 18 and I can do what I want even if they hate me for it. But I feel sad that lm wishing away what’s supposed to be some of the funnest and carefree times of my life. 

3 Replies 3

Eevier
Community Member

Hugs and love to you Ofosol_4. Sounds like the communication is a bit strained there and you're feeling unfairly treated. Hang in there you're not alone xx

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Hello Ofosol_4, at your age of 16, parents are trying to balance you from being a kid but now almost an adult and try to raffle between the two, as you can now get your learners to drive a car, but now is the time for them to expect you as almost an adult, where you can do whatever you like.

You are entitled to go to your friends place, unless legally you aren't allowed to, which is not the case here, as you can see a doctor on your own etc., and can move in with your auntie/uncle, so your parents need to respect whether or not you answer your phone.

You are not necessarily under their control, enjoy your time, you can only be 16 once in your life.

Geoff.

Life Member.

Fern42
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi Ofosol_4 

It can be very difficult to assert boundaries with parents around this age. I remember struggling with this myself, I believe they struggle with the change in control that they use to having when you were younger. Hang in there and I hope you don't feel like you need to pull back just because it's not worth the argument, you are entitled to have boundaries, especially once you turn 18. I think it's important to look at this as even though they are having a negative reaction doesn't mean you should give in on that boundary. However, it is important to communicate with them still, assure them that you are safe and you will get back to them as soon. This is important because this stage of life is a transition for both of you, I hope you can preserve through this.