I am unlovable

[alexis123]

I am completely unlovable, due to my anxiety and depression i feel like no one will ever want to love someone who is as broken and anxious as me, i just want to be loved, i am so lonely all the time, I wish people could love me for my personality and not my looks. I now think i will grow old by myself and never feel any real or good love.

[geoff]

Hello Alexis, this is, unfortunately, what this illness makes us believe, that no one will love us, but people do, although perhaps it's not shown and the only reason is that they may not know how to help you, but love is such a strong word and saying this to someone who is suffering from depression and anxiety won't actually register to them, because their mind is elsewhere.

Looks suddenly attract people, it always has and certainly won't stop, but family and friends only want you to get better but are unable to provide this closeness for reasons you might be unaware of.

If you would like to get back to us, we are here to talk some more.

Geoff.

[quirkywords]

AlexisThanks for expressing yourself so clearly. Many reading your post will relate to you and not feel do alone. Geoff has written a supportive response.

I have bipolar and I used to think I could not burden someone with my illness. I found my moods robbed me of confidence.
I can understand you may feel this way and I wonder have you had an exoerience recently that made you feel this way.

Depression and anxiety can trick us into feeling we are not worthy of love.

Feel free to post more here we are listening.

[missep123]

alexis123,

I hope that you find the love you are looking for, you sound like an incredibly deep and compassionate person.

I can relate to how you are feeling though, as Geoff has mentioned ruminating negative thoughts make us believe a certain way.

What helped me was to realise how I was 'speaking' to myself and what kind of thoughts I was having.

We are here for you whenever you need

[Baljit]

Hi Alexis,

Thank you, for sharing your thoughts and I am sorry that you are feeling this way.

Sadly, one of the symptoms of depression/anxiety is that it makes you feel that you are not worthy of receiving or giving love.

Loving myself first, before others was one of the toughest and hardest parts of my journey, it just felt so unnatural to me.

However it was one of the most powerful and rewarding parts of my recovery and once I started to love myself again it really helped me to realise my self worth and more importantly that there truly were people out there who cared about me and they just wanted the best for me.

With the support and love from your family and friends, you will also start to see a natural growth in both your self-belief and confidence.

Take care and all the best.