Feeling completely lost

[south4th]

Hi everyone, I came here today because I don’t know who to talk to. I’ve been seeing a psychologist for depression but the appointments are few and far between. This week I discovered my ex boyfriend is getting married (while I am still single, and have been for what feels like forever). This set off, to my surprise, some real feelings of worthlessness and what I can only describe as grief, despite the fact I haven’t seen this man for years and he’s in the US anyway, but I guess I had never really gotten over him. On top of that, despite having been successful overseas, now that I’m home in Australia I can’t get a job. I feel lonely, useless, and worthless. All I want to do is sleep or cry. The only thing keeping me going is my dog. I can’t talk to my mum and sister about this as they just wouldn’t understand or at least wouldn’t know what to say to help. I would have talked to my dad but he passed away suddenly a few years ago which makes everything even worse. I just don’t know what to do - I’ve been trying to stay positive, I’ve been looking for jobs, I’ve been going to the psychologist and doing all the things you’re supposed to do, but nothing has really helped and I feel exhausted with the trying and like there’s nothing to look forward to and I’m afraid of the future. Any advice on trying to get through this?? 

[Sophie_M]

Hi south4th,  We are so glad that you've taken a big step in sharing here. It sounds like you’re managing many different feelings and emotions right now which must be very overwhelming. We hope you find some comfort in sharing here, and in hearing from the lovely community members, many of whom will be able to relate to what you’re going through right now.   It can be really good to reflect on why we might be feeling how we’re feeling. Maybe having a look at other’s experiences of self-criticism and negative thinking might be useful. There’s an article on that topic on the Beyond Blue site, here: When your inner critic is giving you a tough time  Remember you can always call our support line to talk this through, on 1300 22 4636, or via webchat 24/7: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/get-immediate-support  Thank you for sharing this and giving this community a chance to offer you their understanding and advice.   Kind regards,   Sophie M 

[HelloGail]

Hi south4th

Last week I had a peak at an ex's FB page from long ago 1984-85; I gave up a great job and a great unit including my two cats for him and then he dumped me but this guy has won money and life looks it's going great for him. I shouldn't had sticky-beaked but I am telling you this south4th as I have a pretty good idea how you're feeling. There is hope, as once you are settled back into Oz someone special just may come along, like blind-sight you and you will soon forget about the man in US. Well, it is easy to say but treasure your dog, develop a good bond as they are so healing. I miss my dogs and would love to have one or two again but it is not affordable for me at present. I am sorry about your dad passing, it sounds like he must have been a great man as you said you could only open up to him. Trust your instincts, and keep up with the psychologist I need to call mine so as having a financial break from them. I call Lifeline occasionally but usually when things are really bad; Lifeline are great people and just hearing a voice at the end of the phone can be soothing. Thank you for your post.